Ayatollah Hermione

Ritchie can also fill a couple of positions further forward at a push. Could see him replacing Fraser in games where we need to launch it onto Wood’s napper

Manquillo’s 20 minutes against Leeds must have swung the 2nd choice berth in his favour

Who could we ring about and panic loan to play a more advanced role? Barkley?

I demand both Zupata and Alli. Go full on into it

We’re attempting to hijack the Dele Alli deal Get in

Mind, if anyone loses their nerve in the last couple of hours, we could well end up with some dodgy winger on loan

Trippier and Targett have great crosses on them which is of good use when your striker is 6’6 though

Aye. The amount of goals we drop from winning positions shows that it’s the back four that needed addressed. There’s still time for us to get somebody on loan as well. Ring about

NOT NOW, GRANT PRINGLE

Hijack the Ramsey deal for the crack

Pack of cunts running Man United, like

I’m pretty positive we’ll go back in again after that, like.

Oh, mate

Hugo soft-cock. Downie says attention is being turned elsewhere AND that we’re pushing for Lingard. 👀

Trippier isn’t an outstanding signing apparently Where do they find this lot

His Mam wants him out the house

Would be canny funny if, at about half 7, we just announced the signing of some other winger for about £3.5 million. The statement would read “We’ve signed this lad for the crack” or something along those lines

Get Lingard in and then Ekitike in the summer. Sounds good to me

Disregard. Send him a private jet big enough to hold his nads

Could well see Lingard choosing West Ham again tbh.

If Ekitike falls through, I’d smash the money down for a permanent deal for Lingard

I’m not going to be making any real judgements based on watching 10 minutes of YouTube highlights tbh

According to RTG, A 40 year old Defoe is a better striker than Ekitike or Wood btw

I could see Howe trusting Schar alongside Burn, just because the former can play out from the back

Aye, that’s why it’s close Relax