Ayatollah Hermione

That Carlos asking to leave is about the only way we’re going to get him, fucking hell. How much do those cunts actually want?

Rules that the silly cunt himself put in place, remember. Beyond belief

Paco Wento, more like

Ant, I’m proposing 12 hour bans for Wyki every time he mentions a Twitter fantasist. I expect this to be pushed through fairly sharpish

It’s nervous enough watching us atm without Eriksen coming into the mix, fucking hell

Anyone watched the latest Around the World in 80 Days adaptation? I’m about 3 episodes in. David Tennant puts in another good performance and it all seems very well written and acted up to now.

Their problem doesn’t seem to be scoring goals tbh

I’ll start a Toontastic one. First guest is Fop and the run time is 9 and a half hours

Everton seem to be plumping for Martinez again so that’s hilarious. Rooney has done a fucking brilliant job at Derby this season, under a massive points deduction and an insane transfer embargo. If not for the deduction, they’d be top half, I believe. The fact that they’re not down and he’s conjuring up those performances out of those players makes me want him nowhere near the Everton job tbh. They can stick with the brown shoe baldy fraudy.

Leicester had Cambiasso in midfield ffs He’d walk into our side now. And I mean him now.

I’m at the point where I’d give Matty a game. At least he can move

Glad to read the bit about how they were shocked at how little the club staff were on. If anything, in the long line of things that do, sums Ashley up, it’s that.

Is he actually good or is he just one of those players who gets better the longer they sit on the bench. AKA Marveaux Syndrome

For all Longstaff was offering, even Hendrick had to have been an improvement. Even if you just told him to come on and track their runners and just drop it off to the nearest black and white shirt when he got the ball

Some party at Oh Yeah’s gaff last night like. Few sore heads in the morning, hey

This Carlos had better be fucking good, like. He wants to have a Van Dijk type transformation on our back four for all we’ve been chasing him

The penny has to have dropped that we need to piss some money away to stay up. I think we’re about to find out just how deep PIFs pockets go as far as their football team are concerned

Mind, I don’t envy Howe having to come into a team where Lascelles of all players is captain, fucking hell. Won’t be easy sitting that lump down and telling him he’s dropped. As for centre halves, if Rodon is available from Spurs on loan, get in tomorrow and get it done. He’s an improvement, even if he’s not this wonderful first choice signing

I think Willock didn’t get on because of his attitude and general performance against Cambridge tbh. It was appalling. As for Howe, I reckon there’s probably an understanding and school of thought that says he needs some actually quality with him before he’s judged properly. I think it’s fair to say that these players are beyond help

That’s it, come into the fold. Where the very mention of an Isaac Hayden Instagram post full of bullshit platitudes is enough to send you into a rage

I think these lads need to remember that Wigan, the best team in that shit league, have 5 games in hand on Sunderland and are only 3 points behind. If they’re struggling, winning all five of those games would leave them just the 12 points ahead.

Did Wood lose a header? Couldn’t have been many if he did. Canny hard being a target man when none of the midfield have the legs to get anywhere near you

Also, fair to say that ASMs performances are largely borne from his (correct) belief that no fucker else can make anything happen. A bit more flair and pace wouldn’t go amiss in the slightest. Not to mention a midfielder who can run past Wood at a pace quicker than glacial

Two centre halves, a central midfielder with a proper engine, another wide player and another striker at the bare minimum. If you’re being more critical, it’s a left back, another keeper and yet another central midfielder as well

Not a chance that defence survives a Premier League campaign. Whatever needs to be paid, gets paid