Ayatollah Hermione

Too much of a mouthful. Get someone else.

Just sent a shiver down my spine. As for bollock shaving, I laser

I think about three different managers have tried to get a tune out of him to no success

Gan get Chris Benoit or whatever he’s called from Marseille, just get an actual real life centre half in

Is “focused minds” code for “loosened up the big man’s purse strings”?

I, for one, am amazed that a French lad doesn’t fancy a battle [/Brexit]

Had three shits today and I’ve drawn an ace every time. Has anyone ever come close to such consistency?

I was under the impression that Cantwell wasn’t getting a game due to personal issues but I could be wrong on that. Either way, he’s a definite improvement on the likes of Fraser and Almiron IMO and is the kind of player we should be rounding the squad out with. Wood would (lol) be an easy signing for me, like. He’s an improvement on the striker which we have now which is nobody but on a more serious tack, outside of this season, his record has been more than solid, he’s a real physical presence, can hold the ball up, good at attacking corners and will relish Trippier knocking crosses into the box for him. It makes perfect sense to me. He’s a far better player than that flat track bully Mitrovic, like

Not hard to be gracious when we were that shit tbf Would take mackem level delusion to say we deserved anything there

It’s nailed on to be for an inconsequential (to him) sum too

He’ll smell some payout somewhere with his shit signs being taken down

Obviously it takes it out of you but a lot of the lethargy is absolutely because you’re stuck in, lying about, doing fuck all except coughing and sweating. Hope you’re back fighting fit soon, mate

Jenas constantly talks about how players are in pain during any sort of congestion or extra time, things like that. No, dickhead. YOU were in pain because you were a massive soft shite with absolutely no heart.

Just back and fucking hell. Longstaff put in a performance barely above Sunday League level, £1m was about 500k too much. You could do a swap for him and say, Davies, with Everton and you’d end up with a much better side of the bargain. Enough has been said about ASM but the amount of loose touches and over hit passes was a complete embarrassment from everyone. At one point, Schar overhit a pass to Trippier by about 35 yards. Just basic stuff that is completely lacking in all of them. On the plus side, Trippier’s actual ability stood out like a sore thumb, he’s head and shoulders above this shower. It was like a Soccer Aid game and he was the one player playing who had only retired 6 weeks previous. As for the manager, I’m sorry like but if Steve Bruce sets that team up today, he’s getting pelters. Repeated crosses to nobody, players played wildly out of position, a left back brought on rather than your young striker at 0-1, all baffling decisions. Aside from Joelinton, he’s getting very little more out of this lot, if you ask me and I truly hope it’s because this lot are beyond help

Strong Colin Robinson vibes from Charnley now I think about it

Better not play Holding, it’ll look like the ghost of some Victorian clergyman is haunting the pitch

Apparently Lille are just wanting different, more immediate add-ones because they’re fucking skint so I say just give them £4 million extra instead of haggling over the 6 month of Apple Music that they’re after

At least Charnley will be back in work.

A lower league side playing a Premier League side on ITV? FIRE UP THE PATRONISING PATTER

Disaster capitalist strikes again. Something on the cheap that he can asset strip and flog on for a minor profit

Where do Watford sign these players? Are they just picking names out of a hat?

I’m going to my first game since COVID so expect calamity

They’re about to get a hard dose of reality with regards to nobody wanting to grace that shithole. Coutinho must be pissing his sides, he’s been coasting for years

Is this the first time we’ve got our first choices in a transfer window? A very strange feeling

was always my favourite