Gemmill

Once this is confirmed by multiple sources, it's time to fire up YouTube.

Too much is hockling in a lass's face. Too much is breaking into a stadium when you haven't got a ticket. Too much is getting every English team banned from Europe for years. A banner and a hostile atmosphere is normal. Dickhead.

Whoa.

It's Operation Market Garden all over again. We're all whistling the Great Escape theme.

Craig exposing himself again as a light theme user. An absolute war crime.

Barcelona (H) PSG (A) Leverkusen (A)

Barcelona coming to SJP.

Yeah was just coming on to ask the same thing. It must do.

Well then I look forward to being outbid by/outpreferred to Bayern in the coming days.

So you're telling me he could've gone to Bayern, but he said no fuck that?

Is he any good?

Why do they do all that shit? You can see the steam rising off it. Anyway, it looks like the draw might actually be about to start.

Given how the rest of the summer has gone, we probably could have done without Hope breaking this news until it was done and dusted.

This is the key section from his article re strikers: However, in a shock development in the past hour, sources in Germany have told Daily Mail Sport that Newcastle are closing in on a deal for Stuttgart striker Nick Woltemade, the 23-year-old Germany international who was linked with Bayern Munich earlier this summer. If so, that would be a huge coup. Two offers for Jorgen Strand Larsen have been rejected this week - the last of which was for £55million - and Wolves do not want to sell. Newcastle were led to believe a deal was possible, prompting those bids for the Norwegian. There has been encouragement from the player’s camp, but also from Jorge Mendes, the super-agent with influence over Wolves’ transfer activity. But in dealing with Mendes, Newcastle were talking to the wrong person, sources say. Because inside Wolves, with chairman Jeff Shi in charge, there is an absolute resolve not to sell the 25-year-old this window. Why? Because they do not have time to find a replacement but, more so, they see Strand Larsen as key to their chances of survival. A potential £40m profit on a player who cost them £23m to make his loan from Celta Vigo permanent this summer might be attractive to some, but against the cost of relegation, it is not so appealing. As Wolves boss Vito Pereira said this week, however, every player has their price. Then there is Yoane Wissa. The representative of the striker has flown into London and is waiting for the green light to travel with the player to Tyneside, such is the determination to get that deal done. For it to happen, sources say, Brentford must sign a replacement. After talking to Bees owner Matthew Benham this week, Wissa still believes his wish will be granted. He wants the No 9 jersey at Newcastle and wants to play in the Champions League under Eddie Howe.

This is the German lad from the kid's euros earlier in the summer. He looked decent tbf. But clearly, we are flailing.

He's got THE CL FEVER!

I've not got it on yet cos I was told it would be endless bullshit at the start. Here you all go btw.

PaddockLad sends his thanks.

Ian Wright, one of the snidest dirtiest cunts ever, going "yes" when Carragher says it went too far. Get fucked.

He could at least keep it open til the window shuts.

28. Scored a good few goals for Girona a couple of seasons back, and a decent return for Roma last season. Bit worrying how far down the list we are here, but needs must.

Our situation is different though cos Isak has 3 years left on his contract. So it's nice that some Liverpool fans think that one of the best strikers in the world should cost £5m less than they paid for Florian Wirtz, but they're objectively wrong.

Ornstein said the same. But that it's a second striker, not a Larsen replacement.

I'm happy to shoot Toonpack now, ask questions later.

His information is usually accurate tbf. He was right about Isak going on strike.