Monkeys Fist

Aye- Chippies that charge for batter scraps…

It’s because we just don’t want to believe that England’s Rose fucked two ginger blokes.

No, because that would then confirm that they’re a pack of lying bastards. Which we know already since they claim Hewitt didn’t tup Our Queen of Hearts until after the ginger cuckoo showed up.…

Longstaff is 27.

Tam, Sam and Becks Sounds like a bar order in Coldstream.

At least one date worked- hence young Harold. People claiming “they never met before he was born” are as naive as the daft fuckers who turn out on Christmas Day to cheer the cunts in to church. She and her husband were rattling the piss out of other people from the minute they got back from the honeymoon we paid for. How can you look at the picture I posted and genuinely say “ Aye, that’s his Dad on the right”?

There is DEFINITELY a pink shell suit top lurking somewhere in PL’s sartorial history. 100%.

Also, she was buckling the bodyguards.

Fist Jnr. has scored a freebie to this one- one of his mate’s parents can’t go so he slid in like Gemmill in a taxi queue. He’s only ever seen us win, 6-0 With that in mind, I’m going to break from tradition and say 5-0.

Hedge porn was the lifeblood of most teenage lads. That, and nicking your old man’s unimaginatively hidden* Hustlers. * under his side of the mattress- what a surprise

Tubby Fuckers ✅

Typo for authenticity

The brunette lass was like catnip to me

Should get a different Saudi company to sponsor each one of his dog leashes. £10 million each per annum.

Nope Yes he would. He’s the Royal Cuckoo. Wouldn’t mind a shot on his Mrs, like, and her Chapel Hat Pegs, naturally. edit; Aye, of course it’s NSFW!

Wouldn’t say no to it hurrying the fuck up a bit, mind.

Agreed. Should be four cowies.

innit blud, y’getme fam?

Tbf, Manure have been the underdogs for a while. Long may it continue.

are these the same MLFs that did the Poznan in the SoL to Manure back in 2012 when Aguero nicked the title in extra time, or was that their great-grandfathers?

Yorkshired YP.

Awful to hear that Strawb mate, you and your loved ones have my sincere condolences. You might be surprised with your Mam- when we lost my little brother* we were very worried about her, as she was nearly 70 at the time and living alone. After the initial grieving and loss, she coped way better than any of us thought she would. People can be remarkably resilient, and hopefully your Mam will be too - look at yourself, you’ve dealt with a ridiculous amount of loss recently and you’re solid. Once again, my sympathy mate, and as Rayvin said, make time to let yourself grieve and process it all. * it’s his birthday today, and I heard his killer is up for release imminently- it’s been a shite day, but nothing compared to your day.

Scene. Gemmill’s living room, he plonks a bucket of sauerkraut and 6 sourdough flatbreads down and throws the Mrs. her matching Mr. Blobby onesie, (he’s already kitted up). “ Settle in pet, I’ve got seasons 1-10 of Neighbours lined up for us. You’ll never guess what Daphne looks like now …” Mrs. G, putting her coat on as she heads for the door … “ Sorry love, my Dad’s coming round for a shite or two, I’m off to the pub!” Gemmill- “ Oh…Throw my tiger feet slippers over, would you?”

You can keep Charlene and Daphne, I only ever tuned in if this minx was going to be on… Straight in to the High Interest Account, along with Mariella Hurdy Gurdy Hassenfassen