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Paul the Octopus


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Guy walks into a bar with an octopus. He sits the octopus down on a stool and tells everyone in the bar that this is a very talented octopus. He can play any instrument in the world. He will bet £50 on it.

 

A guy walks up with a guitar and sits it beside the octopus. The octopus starts playing better than Jimi Hendrix. So the man pays his £50.

 

Another guy walks up with a trumpet. The octopus plays the trumpet better than Dizzy Gillespie. So the man pays his £50.

 

A third guy walks up with bagpipes. He sits them down and the octopus fumbles with it for a minute and sets it down with a confused look. "Ha!" the man says, "Can't you play it?" The octopus looks up at the man and says, "Play it? I'm going to fuck it as soon as I get those pajamas off."

 

:D

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Guy walks into a bar with an octopus. He sits the octopus down on a stool and tells everyone in the bar that this is a very talented octopus. He can play any instrument in the world. He will bet £50 on it.

 

A guy walks up with a guitar and sits it beside the octopus. The octopus starts playing better than Jimi Hendrix. So the man pays his £50.

 

Another guy walks up with a trumpet. The octopus plays the trumpet better than Dizzy Gillespie. So the man pays his £50.

 

A third guy walks up with bagpipes. He sits them down and the octopus fumbles with it for a minute and sets it down with a confused look. "Ha!" the man says, "Can't you play it?" The octopus looks up at the man and says, "Play it? I'm going to fuck it as soon as I get those pajamas off."

 

:D

 

:rimshot:

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I hear he will be preserved..................

 

Pity really - better looking than Lauro, more communicative than Shearer and not as arrogant as that Scots b******

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I mollusc point out that Paul was not a fish, technically speaking. I apologise for knocking you off your perch Kevin, but I can be a sitckleback for such details. I'll stop carping on now before you get so annoyed with me, you'll want to stick my head on a pike.

 

 

And another thing, Paul was born in the same town as my wife-Weymouth. But my wife is not a mermaid or Manitee.

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The death of World Cup oracle Paul the Octopus has sparked a rash of conspiracy theories claiming that the octopus was already long dead before his demise was reported on Tuesday.

 

Paul became a global phenomenon after successfully predicting eight consecutive results during this summer's World Cup in South Africa.

 

Chinese film director Jiang Xiao had been making a film about the cephalopod seer's exploits, but during her research became convinced that the real Paul had died during the tournament.

 

She told The Guardian that she believes Paul actually died two days before the World Cup final - and was quickly replaced by an impostor.

 

"I am 60 to 70 per cent sure that Paul died on July 9 and the Germans have been covering up his death and fooling us for a long time," said Jiang, who is making a film about her claims entitled 'Who killed Paul the Octopus?'.

 

"We have been keeping in touch with the German aquarium ever since the beginning (of production) but it seemed to me that they were afraid," she added. "The movie is about unveiling the inside story behind the octopus miracle, so they felt nervous."

 

As for pulling off the switch, Jiang insisted that such subterfuge would be simple.

 

"They all look the same. It is impossible to tell the difference," she said.

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The death of World Cup oracle Paul the Octopus has sparked a rash of conspiracy theories claiming that the octopus was already long dead before his demise was reported on Tuesday.

 

Paul became a global phenomenon after successfully predicting eight consecutive results during this summer's World Cup in South Africa.

 

Chinese film director Jiang Xiao had been making a film about the cephalopod seer's exploits, but during her research became convinced that the real Paul had died during the tournament.

 

She told The Guardian that she believes Paul actually died two days before the World Cup final - and was quickly replaced by an impostor.

 

"I am 60 to 70 per cent sure that Paul died on July 9 and the Germans have been covering up his death and fooling us for a long time," said Jiang, who is making a film about her claims entitled 'Who killed Paul the Octopus?'.

 

"We have been keeping in touch with the German aquarium ever since the beginning (of production) but it seemed to me that they were afraid," she added. "The movie is about unveiling the inside story behind the octopus miracle, so they felt nervous."

 

As for pulling off the switch, Jiang insisted that such subterfuge would be simple.

"They all look the same. It is impossible to tell the difference," she said.

 

And therefore her evidence for believing him to be dead was...? :D

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The death of World Cup oracle Paul the Octopus has sparked a rash of conspiracy theories claiming that the octopus was already long dead before his demise was reported on Tuesday.

 

Paul became a global phenomenon after successfully predicting eight consecutive results during this summer's World Cup in South Africa.

 

Chinese film director Jiang Xiao had been making a film about the cephalopod seer's exploits, but during her research became convinced that the real Paul had died during the tournament.

 

She told The Guardian that she believes Paul actually died two days before the World Cup final - and was quickly replaced by an impostor.

 

"I am 60 to 70 per cent sure that Paul died on July 9 and the Germans have been covering up his death and fooling us for a long time," said Jiang, who is making a film about her claims entitled 'Who killed Paul the Octopus?'.

 

"We have been keeping in touch with the German aquarium ever since the beginning (of production) but it seemed to me that they were afraid," she added. "The movie is about unveiling the inside story behind the octopus miracle, so they felt nervous."

 

As for pulling off the switch, Jiang insisted that such subterfuge would be simple.

 

"They all look the same. It is impossible to tell the difference," she said.

 

racist scum

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