strawb 5433 Posted November 5 Share Posted November 5 7 hours ago, Monkeys Fist said: Had to do a safety refresher today. Apparently the answer to “ What steps would you take if the trailer became detached unexpectedly whilst you were parked.” is not “fucking big ones”. Box ticking, pointless shit like this is what gives safety a bad name. As well as the Keith Lard cunts who populate it. Really annoys me but it is changing slowly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Craig 12386 Posted November 5 Share Posted November 5 5 hours ago, RobinRobin said: Teacher and her 3 boy students Teacher: “Why did you laugh?” Boy 1: “I saw a strap of your bra.” Teacher: “You are punished to stay out of school for one week.” Boy 2 laughed… Teacher: “Why did you laugh?” Boy 2: “I saw your bra straps.” Teacher: “You are punished to stay out of school for one month.” Teacher bent down to pickup a chalk. Boy 3 started walking out of the class… Teacher: “Why are you leaving?” Boy 3: “I think my school days are over.” I think boy 3 may have been @Monkeys Fist There's absolutely no way MF would have overlooked that opportunity. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 6699 Posted November 21 Share Posted November 21 My wife Lorraine dumped me when she found out I was also seeing Claire–Lee On the bright side, I can see Claire-Lee now Lorraine has gone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 43945 Posted November 21 Share Posted November 21 (edited) Deleted picture Edited December 1 by Howmanheyman 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 14510 Posted November 22 Share Posted November 22 3 hours ago, Christmas Tree said: My wife Lorraine dumped me when she found out I was also seeing Claire–Lee On the bright side, I can see Claire-Lee now Lorraine has gone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 18039 Posted November 22 Share Posted November 22 Little bit of Eurovision humour for you there, lads 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Craig 12386 Posted November 25 Share Posted November 25 On 21/11/2025 at 22:09, Christmas Tree said: My wife Lorraine dumped me when she found out I was also seeing Claire–Lee On the bright side, I can see Claire-Lee now Lorraine has gone My missus is called Lorraine. She suggests you go look for some original material and that if you'd used a Blue Pearl track, it might have been funny Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 6699 Posted November 25 Share Posted November 25 3 minutes ago, Craig said: My missus is called Lorraine. She suggests you go look for some original material and that if you'd used a Blue Pearl track, it might have been funny Did your stolen joke fall flat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Craig 12386 Posted November 25 Share Posted November 25 Just now, Christmas Tree said: Did your stolen joke fall flat I used the 'Naked In the Rain' track when I first met her, to which she replied "Well at least it's original, unlike all the sad fucks who think they've made up the joke about the Johnny Nash track." She got your number several years in advance, I'm well impressed with her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 6699 Posted November 25 Share Posted November 25 3 minutes ago, Craig said: She got your number several years in advance, I'm well impressed with her. And she’s never off the phone. “Could have ended up in CT towers rather than stuck here with Jay from the inbetweeners”. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 63248 Posted November 25 Share Posted November 25 Sorry Craig, when you first met this lass you told her you were looking forward to being naked in Lorraine? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Craig 12386 Posted November 25 Share Posted November 25 32 minutes ago, Gemmill said: Sorry Craig, when you first met this lass you told her you were looking forward to being naked in Lorraine? Aye Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 43945 Posted November 25 Share Posted November 25 I told wor lass her baps passed the test because I'm a.... 🎵Smooth operator..... Smoooooth mackem hater.🎶 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 63248 Posted November 25 Share Posted November 25 The 90s were a different time. Craig's doing this post #metoo. Greg Wallace lost his job for what Craig did. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Craig 12386 Posted November 25 Share Posted November 25 9 minutes ago, Gemmill said: The 90s were a different time. Craig's doing this post #metoo. Greg Wallace lost his job for what Craig did. Gemmill’s just jealous that we’re both pushing 50, I’m getting it and he isn’t Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 63248 Posted November 25 Share Posted November 25 You're getting CANCELLED is what you're getting. Wallace thought he was getting away with it too. THE NET IS CLOSING! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Craig 12386 Posted November 25 Share Posted November 25 1 minute ago, Gemmill said: You're getting CANCELLED is what you're getting. Wallace thought he was getting away with it too. THE NET IS CLOSING! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 43945 Posted November 25 Share Posted November 25 8 minutes ago, Craig said: Gemmill’s just jealous that we’re both pushing 50, I’m getting it and he isn’t Kamagra? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 28558 Posted December 1 Share Posted December 1 I sent my son to his room for saying Jim Morrison was a terrible musician Sorry but we do not slam The Doors in this house! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 63248 Posted December 1 Share Posted December 1 Quite right too. A man's got to have rules. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aimaad22 6003 Posted December 1 Share Posted December 1 How does a dead pirate take a piss? RRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr IP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 14510 Posted December 2 Share Posted December 2 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 28558 Posted December 3 Share Posted December 3 I was robbed by 6 dwarfs today Not Happy 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 63248 Posted December 3 Share Posted December 3 Totally understandable mate, hope they didn't take anything of too much value. 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 43945 Posted December 3 Share Posted December 3 9 minutes ago, wykikitoon said: I was robbed by 6 dwarfs today Not Happy I'd be foaming too, like. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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