OTF 6190 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 (edited) Couldn't resist after Stevie mentioned he'd have Dani Alves in his. If you had to name a full side of absolute twats, who would be in it? The great thing about this category is that the reason why they are cvnts is entirely in the eye of the beholder, so feel free to justify it in any way you like. I'll get started on mine. Dida - The reaction from this complete bell-end to a tap from a Celtic supporter was cringe worthy. John Terry - True definition of wanker. So completely full of himself that I could see him having a larger than life photograph of himself in the entry of his house. Robert Huth - Dirty dirty cheat, who I can't forgive for his stomp on Shearer's groin (Shearer's Mrs may have an alternate take). Ashely Cole - Need I go on? Phil Neville - Despite not being a particularly good footballer thinks he is great. If he was at a smaller club he'd be just another slow fullback. Nigel de Jong - High Fiving team mates after breaking someones leg with a bad tackle. CVNT. Steven Gerrard - Absolute cock, diving prick, wears his shorts too high, thinks way too highly of himself. The most cvntworthy thing about him by far is the way in which he attempts to influence the referee by getting in their face. Ashley Young - Calling him a soft touch complaining bitch would be putting it nicely. There's worse divers out there, but the way this guy reacts moves him into this makeshift side. Cristiano Ronaldo - Possibly the only person in the world who could make John Terry appear humble. El Hadji Diouf - Possibly the most hateable player in world football. Dirty, spitting, cheating grub of a human being. Didier Drogba - Blatant cheat, not afraid to have a sulk if things aren't going his way. Still pisses me off to this day the way he moved a free-kick against us and consequently scored the match winning goal. Bench: Michael Owen - Not good enough to be in the first team, but playing 25 minutes in this side is better than earning your money elsewhere. The worst kind of cvnt, smug little injury prone bastard. Robbie Savage - Too shit to make the starting 11, but an absolute cvnt nonetheless. Chris Morgan - Sheffield United defender also too shit to make the starting side. Complete and utter dick, dirty as they come and just looks like an absolute cvnt. Kevin Muscat - See above, except an even bigger cvnt. Rivaldo - That dive clutching his face in the World Cup was a complete and utter embarrassment takes the cake in terms of simulation particularly when you consider the stage upon which it was enacted. Wayne Rooney - Self obsessed ugly ginger troll. Edited April 28, 2011 by OzToonFan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McFaul 35 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 (edited) Jens Lehmann Dani Alves John Terry Gerard Pique Mick-ea Grayuh Robert Pires Roy Keane Robbie Savage That scruffy mackem little bastard who plays for Ipswich what a rodent looking fuckin nob that kid is, forget his name Rivaldo Michael Owen © Edited April 28, 2011 by McFaul Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom 13883 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Lee Cattermole x 11 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38829 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Sorensen Lee Dixon Gary Pallister Micky Grayuh ©Stevie Ricardo Carvalho Dennis Wise Robbie Savage Paul Ince Kevin Ball Andy Gray Stan Collymore. Subs; Jens Lehman Kevin Kilbane Julian Dicks C. Ronaldo Dennis Bergkamp Manager; A. Wenger Cunts, every one of them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toonotl 2431 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Interesting... Cech - Anyone that wears a skullcap in football is an automatic cvnt. Kevin Muscat - The single biggest cunt in the history of football. Full Stop. John Terry * Samba - Honestly the guy looks like he belongs on deathrow. Chivu - Simply to justify Cech's inclusive for skullcap usage. Ashley Young - The worst whingy whiny little cvnt to ever grace a football pitch. Fletcher - Shit player who Fergie loves. Cunt. Gerrard * In'Somnia - Refusing to play because the gaffer mispronounces your name. Terriesque cuntiness. Rooney * Owen * * No explanation needed. Manager: Roy Keane Chairman: The Fat Cunt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barney 0 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Lehman Dixon-Keown-Terry-ACole VanBommel-Ball-Cattermole-DeJong CRon9-Fenton Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38829 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Interesting... Cech - Anyone that wears a skullcap in football is an automatic cvnt. Kevin Muscat - The single biggest cunt in the history of football. Full Stop. John Terry * Samba - Honestly the guy looks like he belongs on deathrow. Chivu - Simply to justify Cech's inclusive for skullcap usage. Ashley Young - The worst whingy whiny little cvnt to ever grace a football pitch. Fletcher - Shit player who Fergie loves. Cunt. Gerrard * In'Somnia - Refusing to play because the gaffer mispronounces your name. Terriesque cuntiness. Rooney * Owen * * No explanation needed. Manager: Roy Keane Chairman: The Fat Cunt Cech has no choice, the cap is to protect the weakened area of his skull man! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JawD 31 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 El Hadji Diouf has to be in there somewhere Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NobbySol 0 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Jens LehmannDani Alves John Terry Gerard Pique Mick-ea Grayuh Robert Pires Roy Keane Robbie Savage That scruffy mackem little bastard who plays for Ipswich what a rodent looking fuckin nob that kid is, forget his nameRivaldo Michael Owen © Leadbitter? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GeeForce 0 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Sorenson N Shorey - Julian Dicks - Terry - Bruce D. Murphy - J. Wilshere - K. Henry - E.H. Diouf Owen - D. Holdsworth Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carrolll40th 0 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 SorensenLee Dixon Gary Pallister Micky Grayuh ©Stevie Ricardo Carvalho Dennis Wise Robbie Savage Paul Ince Kevin Ball Andy Gray Stan Collymore. Subs; Jens Lehman Kevin Kilbane Julian Dicks C. Ronaldo Dennis Bergkamp Manager; A. Wenger Cunts, every one of them. y is bergkamp there? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carrolll40th 0 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 El Hadji Diouf has to be in there somewhere cant argue with that. surely gary neville has to be in there is well Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38829 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 SorensenLee Dixon Gary Pallister Micky Grayuh ©Stevie Ricardo Carvalho Dennis Wise Robbie Savage Paul Ince Kevin Ball Andy Gray Stan Collymore. Subs; Jens Lehman Kevin Kilbane Julian Dicks C. Ronaldo Dennis Bergkamp Manager; A. Wenger Cunts, every one of them. y is bergkamp there? Because he is a massive cunt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carrolll40th 0 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 SorensenLee Dixon Gary Pallister Micky Grayuh ©Stevie Ricardo Carvalho Dennis Wise Robbie Savage Paul Ince Kevin Ball Andy Gray Stan Collymore. Subs; Jens Lehman Kevin Kilbane Julian Dicks C. Ronaldo Dennis Bergkamp Manager; A. Wenger Cunts, every one of them. y is bergkamp there? Because he is a massive cunt i guess i had that one coming. ok, what has he done to make him a cunt? ( i always thought he was a bit like zola, a true professional and someone everyone liked) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holden McGroin 4894 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 I'd be tempted to put 1/2 the Barca team in after last nights events Puyol is a bell end of the highest order. Busquets is a slimey, diving cheating twat Pedro is a diving fairy. I could go on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Billy Whitehurst 790 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Off the top of my head, based on players currently playing or who have played this season. My all time list involves a lot of thought and too much rage before the long weekend. Boruc G Neville © Materazzi Lucio Terry Savage Henry De Jong Muscat Diouf Owen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McFaul 35 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Jens LehmannDani Alves John Terry Gerard Pique Mick-ea Grayuh Robert Pires Roy Keane Robbie Savage That scruffy mackem little bastard who plays for Ipswich what a rodent looking fuckin nob that kid is, forget his nameRivaldo Michael Owen © Leadbitter? i "Grant Leadbitter" thats him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McFaul 35 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 SorensenLee Dixon Gary Pallister Micky Grayuh ©Stevie Ricardo Carvalho Dennis Wise Robbie Savage Paul Ince Kevin Ball Andy Gray Stan Collymore. Subs; Jens Lehman Kevin Kilbane Julian Dicks C. Ronaldo Dennis Bergkamp Manager; A. Wenger Cunts, every one of them. y is bergkamp there? Because he is a massive cunt i guess i had that one coming. ok, what has he done to make him a cunt? ( i always thought he was a bit like zola, a true professional and someone everyone liked) Bergkamp would be on my bench, unbelievable player, but a sneaky dirty bastard. One of the dirtiest players in football but he always did it in a sly way, stamping on players feet etc... Always reminded me of a SS man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Billy Whitehurst 790 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Agree with the Bergkamp suggestion. Always thought he was a right sly fucker even if he was a cracking player. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StoneColdStephenIreland 74 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 I hate that Kyle Lafferty who plays for Rangers, he's is just a massive cockend! Anyone see it when he feigned getting slapped in a game and his robot celebration is absolutely twatful! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38829 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Agree with the Bergkamp suggestion. Always thought he was a right sly fucker even if he was a cracking player. Aye, sublimely talented, but a sly bastard. I've never forgiven the twat for getting Robert sent off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snakehips 0 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Unless I've missed it, that uber cunt David Speedie is in there without question. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luckyluke 1 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Stefan Kuntz. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McFaul 35 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 Stefan Kuntz. Reminds me of Motty's commentary in that game at Old Trafford against the Czech's "Moller and Sammer have been tremendous today, Germany bossing the midfield........KUNTZ" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Billy Castell 0 Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 SorensenLee Dixon Gary Pallister Micky Grayuh ©Stevie Ricardo Carvalho Dennis Wise Robbie Savage Paul Ince Kevin Ball Andy Gray Stan Collymore. Subs; Jens Lehman Kevin Kilbane Julian Dicks C. Ronaldo Dennis Bergkamp Manager; A. Wenger Cunts, every one of them. y is bergkamp there? Because he is a massive cunt i guess i had that one coming. ok, what has he done to make him a cunt? ( i always thought he was a bit like zola, a true professional and someone everyone liked) Bergkamp would be on my bench, unbelievable player, but a sneaky dirty bastard. One of the dirtiest players in football but he always did it in a sly way, stamping on players feet etc... Always reminded me of a SS man. Stamped on Nissa Johansson's ribs against Blackburn, and did a forearm smash in the face on the same player during another game. My team: Jason Brown Gary Neville John Terry David May Graeme Le Saux Joey Barton Steven Gerrard Dennis Wise Bergkamp Van Piersie Christiano Ronaldo Subs: Alan Fettis Ashley Cole Jamie Carragher Ledley King Lee Bowyer E-H Diouf Lee Hughes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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