Monkeys Fist 47070 Posted June 13 Share Posted June 13 On 12/06/2025 at 13:10, ewerk said: Sam Fender playing tonight. Young Ms. Fist went to this. She’s been recovering from a serious illness and this was one of her milestones so she was over the moon to be able to go. I asked her what the highlight of the gig was and she said it was afterwards in the Metro station. They were on the platform, the place was packed with everyone singing when it suddenly went quiet, and a strong tang of stale sweat and dirty kegs drifted through the place. She turned around and saw a pathway open up through the crowd, and two lads in sunderland tops making their way confidently towards the platform, handing out slices of Pocket Cheeyse as they went. Everyone gratefully received their slice , until they got to two lads stood next to my daughter. She said they were both 7ft tall and over twenty stone with muscles on their fingers. No sooner had they refused The Cheeyse when, KABLAAM, KAPOOOW! The pair of them were one-punched by the givers of The Cheeyse- sparked out cold. Everyone looked at their feet, and the atmosphere was briefly uncertain, but then some international students, 5 Japanese lasses, reverently approached the two lads and requested Cheeyse. As soon as they got their slices, they started hopping up and down, clapping their hands and squeaking, ” We hate the mags anarl, Mallas!” Our two heroes got on their train, and as it pulled away and headed south, Ms. Fist thought she heard an Elvis song come over the station PA, but she’s not sure because at that very same moment EVERY SINGLE PERSON in that station broke out in spontaneous applause and cheering as our heroes left the station. I’ve just snuck in to check on her now, and she’s slept with The Slice under her pillow, and has replaced her poster of Mohammed bin Salman Al Saud with this one of Eric Gates Marras, I’ve never been so proud of her. True story 14 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 13208 Posted June 13 Share Posted June 13 1 hour ago, Monkeys Fist said: Young Ms. Fist went to this. She’s been recovering from a serious illness and this was one of her milestones so she was over the moon to be able to go. I asked her what the highlight of the gig was and she said it was afterwards in the Metro station. They were on the platform, the place was packed with everyone singing when it suddenly went quiet, and a strong tang of stale sweat and dirty kegs drifted through the place. She turned around and saw a pathway open up through the crowd, and two lads in sunderland tops making their way confidently towards the platform, handing out slices of Pocket Cheeyse as they went. Everyone gratefully received their slice , until they got to two lads stood next to my daughter. She said they were both 7ft tall and over twenty stone with muscles on their fingers. No sooner had they refused The Cheeyse when, KABLAAM, KAPOOOW! The pair of them were one-punched by the givers of The Cheeyse- sparked out cold. Everyone looked at their feet, and the atmosphere was briefly uncertain, but then some international students, 5 Japanese lasses, reverently approached the two lads and requested Cheeyse. As soon as they got their slices, they started hopping up and down, clapping their hands and squeaking, ” We hate the mags snarl, Mallas!” Our two heroes got on their train, and as it pulled away and headed south, Ms. Fist thought she heard an Elvis song come over the station PA, but she’s not sure because at that very same moment EVERY SINGLE PERSON in that station broke out in spontaneous applause and cheering as our heroes left the station. I’ve just snuck in to check on her now, and she’s slept with The Slice under her pillow, and has replaced her poster of Mohammed bin Salman Al Saud with this one of Eric Gates Marras, I’ve never been so proud of her. True story FTM 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzler 13077 Posted June 13 Share Posted June 13 11 hours ago, Monkeys Fist said: Young Ms. Fist went to this. She’s been recovering from a serious illness and this was one of her milestones so she was over the moon to be able to go. I asked her what the highlight of the gig was and she said it was afterwards in the Metro station. They were on the platform, the place was packed with everyone singing when it suddenly went quiet, and a strong tang of stale sweat and dirty kegs drifted through the place. She turned around and saw a pathway open up through the crowd, and two lads in sunderland tops making their way confidently towards the platform, handing out slices of Pocket Cheeyse as they went. Everyone gratefully received their slice , until they got to two lads stood next to my daughter. She said they were both 7ft tall and over twenty stone with muscles on their fingers. No sooner had they refused The Cheeyse when, KABLAAM, KAPOOOW! The pair of them were one-punched by the givers of The Cheeyse- sparked out cold. Everyone looked at their feet, and the atmosphere was briefly uncertain, but then some international students, 5 Japanese lasses, reverently approached the two lads and requested Cheeyse. As soon as they got their slices, they started hopping up and down, clapping their hands and squeaking, ” We hate the mags anarl, Mallas!” Our two heroes got on their train, and as it pulled away and headed south, Ms. Fist thought she heard an Elvis song come over the station PA, but she’s not sure because at that very same moment EVERY SINGLE PERSON in that station broke out in spontaneous applause and cheering as our heroes left the station. I’ve just snuck in to check on her now, and she’s slept with The Slice under her pillow, and has replaced her poster of Mohammed bin Salman Al Saud with this one of Eric Gates Marras, I’ve never been so proud of her. True story I heard this from Newbiggin Hall. It sounded shite. Fender, not the obviously true story about the two rock hard mackem gladiators. Praise be upon them, 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 15430 Posted June 13 Share Posted June 13 “Mallas” 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 38709 Posted June 13 Share Posted June 13 In a galaxy not too far away..... STAR WARS A brand no hope..... Lewk Bullknaka and his fwends are in a battle with North Shields star, Sam Fender and the eehval Saudi empire, Fender alongside the feared Darth Beheadie Eddeh will try and crush the rebels without a clew forever. May the force of their 104 football alliances be with them!! "Stay classy, marra" 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 38709 Posted June 13 Share Posted June 13 (edited) "I'm your father, Lewk." "NOOOOOooooooo! Mam said me dad is Mr Jenkins who keyps coming around to fix mam's washing machine every weyk." Edited June 13 by Howmanheyman 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 38322 Posted June 13 Share Posted June 13 20 minutes ago, Howmanheyman said: Lewk Bullknaka 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dougle 3942 Posted June 14 Share Posted June 14 (edited) https://www.nytimes.com/athletic/football/team/newcastle-united/ from .com knack me if links to them is not allowed Edited June 14 by Dougle 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 47070 Posted June 14 Share Posted June 14 6 hours ago, Dougle said: https://www.nytimes.com/athletic/football/team/newcastle-united/ from .com knack me if links to them is not allowed Im just so grateful his parents christened him William and not Phillip. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzler 13077 Posted June 14 Share Posted June 14 1 hour ago, Monkeys Fist said: Im just so grateful his parents christened him William and not Phillip. Bill McCracken. That poor platypus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 53517 Posted Sunday at 05:19 Share Posted Sunday at 05:19 Don't get too excited lads, just a quick two week check in to make sure you're all OK. It's probably felt like about 6 weeks for you, I imagine. Hope Toonpack has been keeping you all entertained with his great jokes. Anyway, I haven't bothered to catch up but I'm assuming there's blind panic at the fact we haven't signed anyone yet, and of the players we are linked with, the forum's player valuation experts have ruled them all "not worth that much". How did I do? 1 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 12583 Posted Sunday at 05:40 Share Posted Sunday at 05:40 Rent free 😂😂😂 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 53517 Posted Sunday at 05:46 Share Posted Sunday at 05:46 Oh dear, patter still desperate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonpack 12583 Posted Sunday at 05:55 Share Posted Sunday at 05:55 You need to search out some PL posts, he said you'd been destroyed by KCG and Dougle and had flounced off in the huff and he was very concerned about your wellbeing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 53517 Posted Sunday at 05:58 Share Posted Sunday at 05:58 Too many drugs in the 90s for that one. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 24284 Posted Sunday at 06:57 Author Share Posted Sunday at 06:57 Hope you're well Gemmill. No panic in here there but other social media fuck me. Spaniel and Tory are pissing their knickers. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaddockLad 20165 Posted Sunday at 07:14 Share Posted Sunday at 07:14 Stop unplugging the server every few days Gemmill you rotten bastard 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dougle 3942 Posted Sunday at 15:22 Share Posted Sunday at 15:22 22 hours ago, Monkeys Fist said: Im just so grateful his parents christened him William and not Phillip. Dan McCafferty highly agrees with this sentiment. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 47070 Posted Sunday at 15:27 Share Posted Sunday at 15:27 4 minutes ago, Dougle said: Dan McCafferty highly agrees with this sentiment. Not any more, he doesn’t. ( was the above pic taken in 2023?) 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaddockLad 20165 Posted Sunday at 17:04 Share Posted Sunday at 17:04 Your first in what may turn into an occasional summer series of Mad Dog updates This being the said aforementioned M. Redknapp esq.... https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7570999/Harry-Redknapps-eldest-son-49-court-accused-drug-driving.html 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
acrossthepond 1039 Posted Sunday at 19:49 Share Posted Sunday at 19:49 12 hours ago, PaddockLad said: Stop unplugging the server every few days Gemmill you rotten bastard 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wykikitoon 24284 Posted Monday at 07:20 Author Share Posted Monday at 07:20 14 hours ago, PaddockLad said: Your first in what may turn into an occasional summer series of Mad Dog updates This being the said aforementioned M. Redknapp esq.... https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7570999/Harry-Redknapps-eldest-son-49-court-accused-drug-driving.html 'Fat Jamie Redknapp, you're just a fat Jamie Reeeeeeeeedknapp' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzler 13077 Posted Tuesday at 15:23 Share Posted Tuesday at 15:23 On 16/06/2025 at 08:20, wykikitoon said: 'Fat Jamie Redknapp, you're just a fat Jamie Reeeeeeeeedknapp' Would it be too harsh to say he looks like a Down’s syndrome Danny Dyer? 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chaser 1466 Posted Tuesday at 15:50 Share Posted Tuesday at 15:50 25 minutes ago, Dazzler said: Would it be too harsh to say he looks like a Down’s syndrome Danny Dyer? Looking at the pic of his Mrs, his surname must be doing some heavy lifting. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzler 13077 Posted Tuesday at 16:06 Share Posted Tuesday at 16:06 15 minutes ago, Chaser said: Looking at the pic of his Mrs, his surname must be doing some heavy lifting. "Jamie Redknapp's lookalike brother" - I bet Jamie would be thrilled reading that. Good job he can't. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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