The Fish 9032 Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 Guess she just wasn't feeling it, eh? I did actually doubt myself until a friend asked me about her sexual apathy. After that, I was back to my usual cocksure self. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 27072 Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 70% of those are made up, but some of them are corkers. I was having sex and was obviously doing it in a manly and vigorous fashion because apparently my nose started bleeding, I didn't notice at first until she said "Eww you're bleeding on me" and me being the gallant gentleman replied "Well you started it". Another time I was working my magic on top of a lass that was just laying there, dead fish, I asked her if she was ok and wanted to stop? She replied with a wan smile "No, I'm having a lovely time." Zzzzzip, see ya later, thank you and good night. One night stands are fun. "That's Magic!" "Not a fucking lot!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 9032 Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 27072 Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 This really needed KSA's soundtrack, to be fair. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38911 Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 I did actually doubt myself until a friend asked me about her sexual apathy. After that, I was back to my usual cocksure self. Confession- I've had the exact same scenario. Mine was a lass from that there Lahndahn, when I was 19. We were working in the Lake District, I had a crack at her one night, and stopped midway through and went for a beer, saying something along the lines of " Well, if you're not even going to try, Pet.." A two word conversation with a mate who'd also had the pleasure confirmed it. " Corpse?" "Corpse" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 27072 Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 " And then I say my spell..... Dave the 'Fish' Debbie McGee' Sexual magic Female apathy ..... And the pack of cards turns into a ..........Where you going, Babe? Where you going?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 9032 Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 Confession- I've had the exact same scenario. Mine was a lass from that there Lahndahn, when I was 19. We were working in the Lake District, I had a crack at her one night, and stopped midway through and went for a beer, saying something along the lines of " Well, if you're not even going to try, Pet.." A two word conversation with a mate who'd also had the pleasure confirmed it. " Corpse?" "Corpse" Course I've had the opposite. A lass was so over-the-top, moaning, groaning wailing and screaming like I was as good as 3 John Holmeses. Only went back about a dozen times after that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 9032 Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 " And then I say my spell..... Dave the 'Fish' Debbie McGee' Sexual magic Female apathy ..... And the pack of cards turns into a ..........Where you going, Babe? Where you going?" Dunno why but of all that, it's the suggestion I'd say "Babe" that I'm most offended by Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 27072 Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 Dunno why but of all that, it's the suggestion I'd say "Babe" that I'm most offended by You mightn't say it, but 'Bravado' would. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 9032 Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 You mightn't say it, but 'Bravado' would. Thanks Babe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 14100 Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 http://metro.co.uk/2014/02/19/from-icelandic-tracksuits-to-latvian-lunacy-the-oddest-songs-aiming-to-compete-at-eurovision-2014-4305796/ Apparently there's a Eurovision fan working for Metro. I'm actually a little bit jealous. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 9032 Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 Sesame Stree Fighter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desmondTUTU 0 Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2563693/Baby-Ps-mother-denied-NHS-gastric-band-surgery-ballooning-24st-diet-crisps-cake-EIGHT-Double-Decker-bars-day.html Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 9032 Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 Daily Mai... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desmondTUTU 0 Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 Mail* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 34792 Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 How is that newsworthy ffs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 9032 Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desmondTUTU 0 Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 How is that newsworthy ffs. she eats (up to) 8 double deckers a day* *double deckers can be bought in bundles of 4 for one pound from your local aldi. maybe she has been hit by the cuts? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 14100 Posted February 21, 2014 Share Posted February 21, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Dynamite 5945 Posted February 21, 2014 Share Posted February 21, 2014 Fair play to them. The government has agreed to a new election. In this country we would just have a bit moan on Facebook and then apathy would set in before we just have up and accepted whatever shafting the government was giving us. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 12775 Posted February 21, 2014 Share Posted February 21, 2014 Amazing that the left hand side is completely untouched by the rioting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 14100 Posted February 21, 2014 Share Posted February 21, 2014 It's a metaphor for the ideological split between West and East Ukraine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trophyshy 6441 Posted February 21, 2014 Share Posted February 21, 2014 Amazing that the left hand side is completely untouched by the rioting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38911 Posted February 21, 2014 Share Posted February 21, 2014 Bloody hell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happy Face 29 Posted February 21, 2014 Share Posted February 21, 2014 What's the score there like, I've not been following it. Are they all disgruntled Klitchko fans looking to get him a title fight? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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