Howmanheyman

Phil Jones.

0-1 to Liverpool at half time. Gerrard pen.

They might as well be against the likes of Palace at home because they just cannot beat them when the pressure is on and couldn't score in a brothel. (One of those games in hand is Man City away for definite).

I'm 41 this year, look at least 5 years younger. This is PL relaxing in the bath after a hard shift sitting in the canteen ignoring phone calls from harassed shipyard workers wanting a trip reset in the Pompey docks.......

"PARKY!! YOU MUST USE YOUR LIFE INTELLIGENCE FROM HERE IN AND CAREFULLY AVOID BUYING STAINED GLASS WINDOWS, THAT WAY LIES PREMATURE MIDDLE AGED LIFE, SHOPPING AT MARKSIES AND WEARING BARBOUR JACKETS. WATCH OUT FOR REMOTE CONTROLLED HOOVERS, THAT IS THEIR FOOT IN THE DOOR AND THE BEGINNING OF THE END."

A big test for Liverpool as well, Man U will be desperate.

I once saw a deputy head knocked clean out for asking a crestfallen kid if he 'was one of the idiots on the pitch?' (put this one in the 'class if true' category for the benefit of Rayvin).

Man U are playing Liverpool today and I'm sure it's the North London derby as well. Glad I chucked Sky sports in as the hyperbole will be off the map today in the sky studio and it wouldn't surprise me if presenter man turned round to the window looking on to the pitch, dropped his pants and starting pumping his swan's neck furiously whilst muttering 'super sunday judgement day clash of the titans, millions worldwide watching, wibble wibble' repeatedly. Probably.

Honestly, the exams were a piece of piss, but I lived in Walker, played football all the time, went to away games from 14 years old and knew nobody whatsoever who had been to university. Stay in and do homework? Why the fuck would you do that when we had a game at Wallsend Boys Club? I knew I wasn't an idiot and would easy get a job. What I didn't twig was that I'd be stuck doing shiftwork for the next twenty odd years.

The deputy head was a Mackem, he was on the doors as we traipsed in for one of the exams. His only comment was, 'Were you one of those idiots on the pitch, Dunny?'

1990. Would have much preferred O levels as I did fuck all course work which IIRC was 60% of my marks. I'd have pissed it if it was made up 100% of your actual exams. I honestly could have a severe word to that 16 year old kid if I could.

I had to write about the Weimar Republic in my GCSE exams. Put that in your fucking pipe and smoke it.

Watched Gravity on Monday, aye it was ok but nothing more. Re-watched 'Volver' last night, it's a decent film worth watching if you've never seen it but to be honest I only put it on again through boredom and a fancy to see Penelope Cruz's lovely visage.

Are you Nigel?Are you Nigel? Are you Nigel Farage in disguise? Are you Nigel Farage in disguise? Love being in Europe, me. Tell me Ma, me Ma! I won't be home for tea, We're going to Italy! Tell me Ma, me Ma!

Desmond, change your name to 'Martin Thomas' shinpads' as a conciliatory gesture and maybe have your avatar as Kevin Carr's successor who had a tache just like his predecessor.

Yep, I think they're fucked regardless but it boils my piss we've gave them a hand with their two wins.

Goals are so important in the PL and this has to be the big worry if/when Remy moves on. We need a masterstroke in the summer or it could be a long season next year.

They have the hardest away fixtures by a mile, they cannot win at home in 'winnable' games as the players and support collectively shit their pants.

One of those games is at Man City.

Had us down for a defeat the minute I found out he was ref coupled with Remy and Debuchy out. Also had the Mackems as a 0-0 on the super 6.

93rd min winner for Everton.

West Brom winning 2-1 at Swansea, Cardiff drawing away at Goodison.

Armstrong on for Frank Pingel.

Next year be afraid, be very afraid.

Shit by Krul, really shit.