Jimbo

Best of luck, hope you enjoy the place more than I did.

I'm not sure which thread is funnier, this or the Sinatra.

Excellent choice Brock, seen series 2 yet ?

I wonder who the 57th will be ?

Liverpool fan, isn't he? Thaksin's a Geordie !

Disturbia Mildly entertaining rip off of The Burbs.

Fucking working this weekend so that's as far as my plans go.

This time the Top Gear producers had gone too far with Richard Hammond's challenges.

2-0 England so far.

Well done ! did you find out what was wrong with the old one ?

Martins Returns To Inter Newcastle United striker Obafemi Martins dropped in to say hello at former club Inter Milan this afternoon. The 23-year-old scored 28 goals in 88 appearances for the Nerazzurri between 2002 and 2006, before his €15m move to Newcastle. With the Premiership season now over, Martins has travelled to Italy on holiday for five days, and he popped in at Inter’s training ground today to say hello to some of his old team-mates. "I'll be here in Italy for five days," the Nigerian told Inter Channel. "I'm still an Interista and I couldn't not come here to say hello to everybody in Appiano. "I'm very busy with my team [Newcastle], but I have been following Inter's matches from England for the whole year." Martins also passed comment on teenage sensation Mario Balotelli. "I saw him and we spoke a bit. I told him that he's good and that he has to keep playing like he's playing," said the forward, who was once an explosive young prospect in his teenage years.

Gareth Rules Out Smith Swoop GARETH SOUTHGATE this afternoon dismissed reports linking Boro with a renewed interest in Newcastle United striker Alan Smith. The 27-year-old England international has failed to pin down a regular place in the Magpies' first team since his £6m move from Manchester United last summer and only managed three goals all season. Boro did make an approach for Smith before he left Old Trafford and reports surfaced in the Tyneside press this week claiming Southgate was poised to make a fresh move. But the Boro boss says he is happy with his current strikeforce and believes that players like a fully fit Mido, Tuncay, Jeremie Aliadiere and Afonso Alves will increase his side's goal output next season. "My view of Alan Smith is he's a striker and we're quite happy with the srtikers we've got," Southgate told mfc.co.uk. "I would not foresee bringing in another striker this summer.

Muse - Unintended

This one ??

BREAKING GOSSIP Arsenal midfielder Cesc Fabregas has called for Spain team-mate David Villa to join him at Arsenal. (Epping Forest Guardian, 1025 BST) Valencia defender Marco Caneira has admitted he could be tempted into leaving the club after Aston Villa were linked with a move for the player. (skysports.com, 1012 BST) Portuguese giants Benfica have said that they have given up trying to lure Manchester City manager Sven Goran Eriksson to Lisbon. (AFP, 1004 BST) Portsmouth chief executive Peter Storrie calls newspaper reports suggesting manager Harry Redknapp may quit as: "An unbelievable load of rubbish, complete and utter make believe." (The Portsmouth News, 0944 BST) Barcelona will offer AC Milan a package of Ronaldinho, Deco and £16m in return for midfield star Kaka. (Italian sports paper Gazzetta dello Sport, 0834 BST). TRANSFER RUMOURS Liverpool are lining up a £10m move for Chelsea winger Florent Malouda. (The Sun) Aston Villa manager Martin O'Neill is considering a £5m bid for Chelsea midfielder Steve Sidwell. (The Guardian) Liverpool striker Andriy Voronin is wanted by German outfit Bayer Leverkusen. (The Sun) Chelsea misfit Andriy Shevchenko is a target for Turkish side Fenerbache. (Daily Mirror) Aston Villa are the latest club to be linked to a move for Blackburn winger David Bentley. (Daily Express) Manchester United defender Jonny Evans is hopeful of securing a £5m move to Sunderland following a loan spell with the Black Cats. (Daily Express) Charles N'Zogbia's bust-up with team-mate Abdoulaye Faye has thrown his future at Newcastle into doubt. (Daily Telegraph) Tottenham have moved a step closer to signing Espanyol keeper Carlos Kameni after the Spanish club themselves signed Cristian Alvarez. (Daily Express) Sheffield United hope to hijack Robert Earnshaw's £2.5m move to Nottingham Forest. (The Sun) Following their relegation to the Championship, Reading could lose Stephen Hunt, Nicky Shorey, Kevin Doyle and James Harper. (The Sun) Aston Villa are hopeful of signing free-agent Stephen Carr who was released by Newcastle last week. (Daily Mail) Villa have also been linked with Brazilian playmaker Diego and German international Bernd Schneider. (The Guardian) West Ham look set to land Palermo midfielder Mark Bresciano for £4m. (Daily Mail) Paris St Germain's £6m-rated striker Amara Diane has spoken of his desire to join Newcastle. (The Sun) Derby manager Paul Jewell is hoping to make Plymouth right-back Paul Connolly his second new signing. (The Independent) Portsmouth midfielder Lassana Diarra has confirmed that he will be at the club next season, ending speculation of a possible summer transfer. (Daily Express) Cardiff City are hopeful of re-signing Sunderland striker Michael Chopra who they sold to the Premier League club last season. (Daily Mirror) Middlesbrough are set to step up their efforts to sign Sheffield United striker James Beattie. (The Star) Back to top OTHER GOSSIP Portsmouth manager Harry Redknapp has revealed he may quit football after Saturday's FA Cup final. (Various) Didier Drogba personally spoke to Lyon and AC Milan about transfers away from Stamford Bridge earlier in his Chelsea career. (Daily Express) Barcelona striker Samuel Eto'o has spoken of his desire to play in the Premier League. (Daily Express) Michael Laudrup is in line to take over from Sven-Goran Eriksson, should the Manchester City manager leave the club. (The Sun) Newcastle are in talks with former England under-21 boss Peter Taylor about a coaching role at the club. (The Sun) Back to top AND FINALLY Chelsea manager Avram Grant has accused referee Steve Bennett of handing the title to Manchester United. (Various) Lord Coe has called for Manchester United manager Sir Alex Ferguson to coach the Great Britain football team at the 2012 London Olympics. "I would love to see Alex coach the team," Lord Coe said. (Daily Telegraph) Proud Welshman Mike Price will net £58,000 if Cardiff City win the FA Cup on Saturday. Price placed a double bet of £25 on Wales to win the Grand Slam (28/1) and the Bluebirds to win the FA Cup (80/1).

RIP

I've been on nights this week so I'll probably be up late tonight, but usually my bed time varies, if I'm on early shifts I'll be in bed by 11pm if I'm off I'm usually up until about 1am.

Peter Reid's England Vs Souness's Scotland. Jesus wept.

Stunning. http://www.worldwidetelescope.org/

QPR have appointed Iain Dowie as their new first-team coach following last week's departure of Luigi de Canio. Dowie spent three years with the club as a player and had stints as caretaker boss and assistant manager. The 43-year-old, who was sacked as Coventry boss in February, has signed a two-year contract. "I'm privileged to have been given the opportunity under the new ownership to return to the club where I served my managerial apprenticeship," said Dowie. "This is a very exciting long-term project." He added: "I've been thoroughly impressed by the new investors and their fresh, aggressive and innovative approach to all sporting matters, as well as the marketing and commercial aspect of this football club. "QPR is a fantastic club, with a successful history and I'm going to relish the challenge that lies ahead." Dowie, who has had spells as manager of Charlton, Crystal Palace, Oldham and Coventry has moved to potentially one of the richest clubs in England. Lakshmi Mittal, the wealthiest person in Britain, has a stake in the west London club, along with Formula One head Bernie Ecclestone and Renault team managing director Flavio Briatore. Italian Briatore has already stated his intention to turn QPR into a world wide brand. Last month he told BBC London 94.9: "I want to create an international brand and I believe we have the possibility. "QPR is a very nice story, you start from the bottom and reorganise the club. It's much more sexy to take a Championship club up [to the top]." Already QPR have signed goalkeeper Radek Cerny and Newcastle defender Peter Ramage in the close season and it is likely the club will bring in more players over the coming months.

Talk to me.

Newcastle fans' Premier League season review By Mark Jensen, editor of The Mag fanzine Last Updated: 11:57pm BST 13/05/2008 How was it for you? We won matches in the first half of the season, but it was pretty desperate stuff at times. If it hadn't been for the change in manager with Kevin Keegan succeeding Sam Allardyce, there wouldn't have been much to laugh about. Verdict: 5/10 The manager - "good job" or "time to go"? There's no doubt in my mind that Kevin Keegan is the person who can take Newcastle forward, so he has to stay. Any manager who comes in mid-season inherits the problems left by the previous one. It took time, but he found a system to get the best out of the players. Best player / worst player: Without doubt Habib Beye has been the most consistent player and shown himself to be a real class act. At the other end of the scale, at 37 appearances and no goals, the flop would be Alan Smith. When you're looking for him to score and create, it's a bit of a damning statistic. Finest hour - the moment of the season: I think the best performance would be the 4-1 win at Tottenham but, in the obvious absence of any real success, then beating Sunderland always gives people here the most pleasure. Big issue: Probably it's going to be whether Newcastle will attract players to take the club forward this summer. Part of that is how much money is available. We have half a team who are good enough. It's a case of buying those four or five to form the other half of the team.

Toon stars pulled apart in pay row By SHAUN CUSTIS Published: 14 May 2008 NEWCASTLE stars Charles N’Zogbia and Abdoulaye Faye had to be dragged apart hours before the final game of the season at Everton. The pair got into a furious row about wages. A Toon source said: “There has been a lot of bickering about wages. "Charles can be a wind-up merchant and Abdoulaye didn’t take very kindly to it. “It was incredibly heated but the other players calmed them down.” Resentment is simmering over huge disparities in contracts between players brought in during the regime of previous chairman Freddy Shepherd and those signed under new owner Mike Ashley.

Aye what a rocket that was !