Mac-Toon

He's been living off the back of TT for a few months now. Joey quotes Mac.

Flinging his own shit about to the delight of the crowd. You see who I mean? White top on with blue and red strike. It's definitely 'Big Davey C', like.

Wew, wew, wew. Bloke at front with his arms aloft next to the 2 boyfriends cuddling; Is that Davey Charlton from Strangeways behind him? I honestly believe it is.

The most embarrassing photograph in the public domain. Look at them two fat cunts cuddling each other at the front, the big red headed mong. Honestly, when they got relegated (numerous times) I couldn't care less. In fact, I was more disappointed than anything else that the best derby in English football wouldn't occur. These bunch on the photo, who've reached the vinegar strokes are embarrassing. MASSIVE CLUB. MASSIVE HEADS. MASSIVE BENEFIT PAYMENTS. MASSIVE MONGS.

Yeah, that's definitely more fitting. 'Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.'

"Imagination is more important than knowledge." I assume it'd be this one.

Of course he did, Nathan. You're used to watching fuckin' Titus.

Again, Kevin, we may well get beat but I never expect us to. What are you basing the 3-1 prediction on? Who's better; Mignolet or Krul? Colo or Wes Brown? Simpson or Bardsley (I'd take Bardsley) Saylor or The Rapist? Tiote or Clattermole? Cabaye or Sess? Larsson or Barton? Gyan or Ba? (I'd take Gyan, like) Shola/Mackem Slayer or Ginge? We're a better side front to back. Still, never shout about going to win, just don't expect us to get beat.

Nice to be quoted on 'Ready to Go (down)'. They're like the duck eggs at school who always set their lip up yet kept getting them burst. Absolute suckers for punishment. I gave a full accurate assessment of their squad. Ours is slightly better but we're in agreement we're wank, they believe they're 'on the cusp'. Dicks.

Clueless. If you actually seen the match then we were well worth a point. Your game against Arsenal was shite, you were turd but Arsenal were worse than turd. They've a poor team this year without Nasri and Fabregas, You's are shite, you haven't won a major trophy since the 50's and you haven't won a league title since the 20's. We won the Inter Cities Fairs Cup in '69. You absolute whopper.

Spot on. Even though we werent at our best yesterday and lets be honest it is going to take a few games fot the lads to gel and find a rhythm. Sunderland away is perfect fixture to ignite our season. They werent at their best yesterday neither but we have, by far a better team. Think Sunderland is the perfect game for Cabaye to show what he's all about. He'll love the battle with Cattermole in the middle. We need Simpson to close his man down quicker than he did at times yesterday. Can't see it being one of the classics due to fitness levels. We're desperate for this striker in. Someone who can get in behind and frighten defenders with his pace. Who has Graham Carr actually 'found' apart from Tiote (Who was at a top Dutch side playing for Ivory Coast)?

In any other game you're right, our strikeforce is piss poor at the minute but against you minnows Shola always steps up and Ba and Best have more about them than Tite-arse and Brown. I'm making nee predictions, bar the seats will be even pinker after a fine summer in sunderland.

Jury is still well and truly out for me. This, 'new style of play we'll enjoy' he talks about is all well and good but without the players to do it, he's talking shite. He looks more and more pissed off with each interview and think he's finally starting to understand that he's a pawn in Ashleys game. Still a cunt too for being in whilst Hughton was still manager of our club. He'll be lucky to see out the season, imo.

Quite impressed , would agree with a lot of this apart from Wes Brown one of the best debuts of all time in a Sunderland shirt , Bramble attacking women . and Tiote will end up in the dressing room if he tries to mark Sess for 90 minutes Aye, Brown's not actually that bad but always likely to pull his man back if he's half a yard behind. Always has done it, always will. It's going to be a tough game no doubt for both sides. our fitness looks pish. Nobody'll agree, but Barton looked fucked after 50 minutes yesterday then got a second wind when moved into the middle. We've got more class in the squad I'd say, yous probably have more fitness after a more structured pre-season.

Anyone heard from Antoine Sibierski recently? I'd take him. Seriously though, how can anyone believe we've even been active in the transfer market for a striker of pedigree? Daniel Sturridge is the man to go for. Never going to happen though due to his valuation. A valuation we should expect to be paid after 'Derek has assured me all the money will be reinvested'. The striker situation for me is just the tip of the iceberg. A second rate centre half for back up and a average left back are what we should expect. Shola was absolutely abysmal yesterday and Lovenkrands offers little in terms of goals nowadays. I think Ba will come good but needs to be given time to find his feet. Think it'll take him a while.

Class.

We've nothing to fear against these lot. Mignolet is dump; prone to clangers. Bardsley's decent on the break but inconsistent defensively. Wes Broon's average at best; nee pace and makes more fouls in and around the box than any other centre half I've seen. Bramble attacks women. Larsson's dangerous from freekicks and if given a chance to cross the ball; Simpson needs to keep close to him and not give him room. Cant play Raylor against him, he'll be tore a new backwheel. Hopefully have a new LB in by then. Clattermole will huff and puff all game until being on the verge of tears; nee goal threat. Sess is dangerous breaking from midfield but Tiote won't give him a sniff. Gyan looked off the pace yesterday and took a knock in the second half. Never fear those beneath you. A small club with a small mentality. I'd never expect us to get 'fucked' off a side like Sun'lun.

'Hmmmm, what's this on/off button do?'

I thought it was 3-4 weeks at the time of injury. This day just gets better and better. I'm still at a loss as to how we could sell our only LB without getting a replacement in. We don't owe Liverpool anything, we can make them wait and if Enrique got injured on Saturday then too bad. It was. I'm probably way off the mark but I honestly believe Ben Arfa's crocked for the duration of his career. One 50/50 away from injury at any time. He'll always be like this. I'd prefer the manager of my football club to tell the truth initially and be pissed off rather than feed us lip-service then back track and apologise when the inevitable lie is uncovered. As a manager, Pardew must think himself incapable of achieving anything. We were class under Keegan and Sir Bobby. Were the 2 teams great? IMO, No. But the manager knew about the size of the club and that passion and belief filtered down to the players who believed they were better than others. Pardew's got these lot in a state of 'happy to be also rans'. He, Ashley and Llambias are a disgrace to this fine football club. It's a shame Pardew couldn't be a man and stand up.

Idiots who get hung up on how much we've received for him. Have they been asleep for the past 3 years. Personally, I'd rather we got pennys for our leavers as it's not getting 'reinvested' in the playing staff so why should we care about Ashleys beer money.

'Ben Arfa 5 or 6 weeks away from comeback'. Alan Pardew There's our new striker signing.

Alan Pardew has confirmed '100%' that we'll have a left back and striker in by end of the window. What a bunch of fucktards. I've got no role at the club, obviously, but even I know that if I've got to drive down to London on saturday; that it's batshit mental to sell my Alfa today on the outside chance I can import an Audi R8 from Germany in time for travelling. The man who 'expected' a striker in by USA trip. He's a mere pawn with a voice in the game that Ashley and Llambias are playing. I'd rather have mugged the dippers off until we have someone signed before selling Jose. Am I mistaken in thinking Pardew complained about how thin our squad was last season? It's fucking anorexic now.

I see Fulham's been put back until sunday 28th August at 1pm to help them recover from Europa League exploits.