Alex

You could say the same about virtually everything he says though. All his commentary is predicated on what he’d do / what would happen knowing full well he’s never going to be in a position to deliver or even influence policy. Even the Brexit stuff is always later given the caveat it wasn’t the right kind of Brexit, opportunities have been squandered etc.

Funniest comment I’ve seen related to him is a reply about his being 16 - when’s his birthday? 29th February?

I heard Bayern Munich were alerted to his brilliance after the best winger in Europe was shackled by him at the stadium of light a couple of weeks back

Including me

Soz, missed that bit. I may be slightly tipsy

And we’ve already signed his long term replacement

Get a fucking grip, you absolute fannies. You’re middle aged men, ffs. If he leaves he’s been a massive part of this team’s transformation to take us from being absolute shite nobodies to PL ‘playas’. So fair play and thanks a lot. But he came here for the money and cause it suited his career. Even if his weekly wage was lower his contract was bigger. If he wants to go, fine. It’s business. He’s towards the end of his career and we’re at the start of being so big we’ll need three wheelbarrows for each testicle. It’s not like the owners are going to pocket the money and not re-invest it

I have to agree with molthemackem here. It’s of no surprise at all that they ignored Exile

Went missing due to it being wedding season

Guaranteed that’s bullshit too. About the waiting list coming down that much. That’ll be the amount of appointments in that period, or something like that.

Trump’s handling of Covid was a good example. With that getting loads of coverage at the time, with a blind eye being turned to the utter fucking shambles ensuing at no. 10. With the BBC’s political editor being briefed directly by Dominic Cummings too

Imagine the UK press reaction to another head of state paying £10m hush money to keep their nonce son out of bother.

Genuinely don’t understand anyone who gives two fucks about either her or Charles. When I read shit like that or recall the coronation coverage it feels a bit like I’ve entered some sort of parallel universe. Although I agree the so-called journalist is playing to the crowd, there really are people who care about these parasites and think they’re wonderful people.

Honestly think he knows it’s a hopeless cause. So the mask is off and he’s not even pretending to care

My favourite one is still the English civil war thing. I.e. a minor skirmish which involved hardly any, if any at all, locals. At a time when Sunderland didn’t even exist in any meaningful sense. Which was actually related to the Bishops War, which was a part of the civil war where the Scots wanted religious freedom. So they allied with the parliamentarians in a ‘the enemy of my enemy is my friend arrangement. You’ll be lucky to find it mentioned in any academic texts. They’ve created a Wikipedia page which references a a website that mentions it in passing. Off the back of that they’ve created a mythical story about its significance and how it’s the root of the rivalry between us and them. It makes the Athletic Bilbao stuff look credible.

They targeted Jonsigns after the derby carry on with the black cats bar. Which would’ve been pathetic enough, but even more so, seeing as the company in question weren’t involved at all

Well he’s a shocking advert for journalists so it’s not surprising

There used to be kids yoghurts called ‘Fiendish Feet’ and the bottom of the pots were shaped like two feet. I’m sure one of the varieties was called ‘Pharaoh Nuff’. Jesus wept at the absolutely useless shite I’ve got stored in my long term memory

Technically half the bridge is in Gateshead which was in County Durham 50 years ago and therefore belongs to Sunderland. So why don’t they make a start on it?

The rest of his money, did he just waste it?

Along with petty jealousy his main motivation seems to be likes for his tweets. Which get virtually no traction despite him linking to them on a very popular message board where he’s preaching to the converted. I.e. even most of them lot see through him / recognise what a sad, boring cunt he is. That said, I find him to be very entertaining

He might fancy the move too in the ‘one last big contract’ sense

Not to mention it would’ve gone relatively unnoticed for most people. Although the amount of time she and most Tory MPs spend on Twitter would’ve skewed that view

Can’t get divorced if you never got married in the first place