Dr Gloom

the king grants your wish, for he is gracious and humble

done

3-1 to us. Goals shared among Ambrose, Dyer and Bramble

The Dolphin is bouncing. Proper Christmas party atmosphere. We can all thank @Howmanheymanfor this. May his job be long and prosperous

man of the match? He barely touched the ball didn’t he, the game was played in their half

he went over looking for contact before the defender made contact. But contact was definitely made. Six of one and half a dozen of the other. It would have been a soft one but I think it’s one of those that stays with the ref’s decision if he gives it on the field

i like him as a rotation option and he's clearly a great lad worth keeping around the squad but these inconsistencies should mean he is a player to bring in when the squad is stretched or in the league cup etc. he's not reliable enough to be our first choice RW, which is the current state of affairs. not if we want to compete for top 4 at least

He’ll bag a few more than he managed last season if he continues in the more advanced midfield role

3-0 to us. Hattrick from Toney

They were fucking dogshit like. Nothing wrong with stating the obvious. Turns out there are some easy games in the PL. However, we’ve dropped points against teams just as bad this season - Everton spring to mind. Today we took our chances. Missed a fair few as well mind but there was only ever one team in it. I loved our first goal. Sweet move from a corner right off the training ground. Tonali was a beast. He has to keep his place at DM. Gordon was back to his scintillating best. Hall was class, yet again. And I was impressed by Osula’s cameo. He should get more minutes off the bench. We’re going to need him now Wilson is crocked.

Nice to see Father Christmas make the effort at this time of year

One of the most dominant halves I’ve seen this season. Can’t believe we’re only one up. We’ve contrived to drop points in so many games like this already this season. Get the second early in the second half and we could win by four or five. Concede a sucker punch and we’ll crumble we’re that brittle. Gordon is playing out of his skin. Chasing down everything and so threatening

Our home record is pretty awesome despite our recent form. What is it - two or three defeats at sjp this calendar year?

does it? i find this type of chat on a football forum so absurd, it’s actually quite amusing

it is if the alternative is Dubravka. Our form massively dipped when he came in last season and we suddenly developed this massive gap between our back four and midfield when our defenders dropped back 10-15 yards because they didn’t trust him to sweep up behind them. He’s had enough chances for me. I’d put in one of the other keepers but Dubs is the one who has been on the bench all season so i expect him to start if pope is crocked for tomorrow’s game

He could be the big one to go in Jan along with Miggy and maybe Trippier. I’d rather not sell him but if the rumours are true and we have to sell to me of our better players to buy, and we get the money back for him to finance a move for a right winger, it wouldn’t be the end of the world. It hasn’t really worked out for him here and we have loads of players who can do a job on the left and fuck all down the right.

I’d be gutted to lose Bruno but if we fail to qualify for Europe I wouldn’t be surprised if we cash in. He’s almost 28 now and good enough to be playing champions league football. If Man City came calling, you could hardly blame him for leaving

I heard he was going to launch a new career as a gardener

pipe down, Tarquin

the stained glass window and now this. renton is never pulling it back from here

Wheel spoke wanker

A cautionary tale