sweetleftpeg

I'd rather we got Madame Helga in to do it. If that's the case, rush the Bill through.

Like I say, nobody is actually complaining.

26843[/snapback] Just became my signature on there. I play 5-a-side with a mackem 'diehard' who was on the defensive the moment I saw him last night. He must have been practising his speech all day. I saw him and greeted him with a 'alreet mat..' before being cut off and getting a 5 minute lecture on how we were doomed and he thought the whole thing was great. I've never heard such an incoherent bitter rant in my life. After I'd picked myself off the floor, I curtailed my giggling, and wished him good luck at Stamford Bridge next week.

I'm surprised the inscription doesn't read 'Murdered by that bastard HRH The Duke of Edinburgh.'

Just imprison all 13-25 year old men then, simple. Oh, and bring back the birch. 26943[/snapback] I'm not 26 till Febuary, can we delay the Bill till the New Year?

Very strange, but very sad story.

Boro is NOT..I repeat...NOT a derby. I couldn't give a monkey's about them one way or the other, never have done. If anything, I dislike them for contiunally thinking we're a derby game and for giving us a tonking at Ayresome Park in 1990 when we needed to win. Even though the result didn't matter in the end, I still like to hold childhood grudges.

'No one likes us, we don't care'

"Man..I must have been REALLY pissed.' Either of them could have said that to be fair.

I remember when Marcotti said we'd be fucked if Given went as Harper is 'woefully bad.' I mean, Given is better than Harper but woefully bad? Just goes to show that he only watches the alleged big three and then whoever is playing them that week. He's an arrogant Sky TV placca football fan who is interested in how the big clubs are doing and no-one else, which imo makes his knowledge of football shite (which he's demonstrated on several occasions) Glad I'm not the only one who's piss is boiled by this overpaid bafoon.

Look, we're going to just have to deal with the fact that 99% of the media want this whole deal and situation to go tits up. We're far more entertaining when we get bad press, this is good press and it's confused the fuck out of them. Reading Anal Oliver is actually a bit of light relief for once.

Class! 26430[/snapback] What tune is that to? 26438[/snapback] You were an 80's boy shirley? Culture Club.

Probably, he's shit in his own nest twice now and Freddy won't take him back. 26097[/snapback] Aye, he's pissed on his chips as far as NUFC is concerned. 26175[/snapback] I don't want him back with no bladder or bowel control. Filthy bastard. 26406[/snapback] To be fair to the lad he was three sheets to the wind and staggering back from town when he pissed on his chips. Or was that me? 26413[/snapback] It depends, did you have a 16 year old lass in tow? Allegedly.

I always promise to do it for Lent then bottle it and go for giving up chocolate instead. Good luck anyway.

Apart from the porn and dogging threads? I'm not complaining by the way. Please, carry on.

Owen – the truth By Ian Notbitter Liverpool Echo..Echo..Echo…Chief Shitstirrer. Michael Owen sat in his hotel room in the greatest city in the world on Monday waiting for the phone call that would give him a little sex wee. Liverpool, Champions of Europe and not at all still living off the 80’s, were on the verge of giving him what he wanted, nay, longed for. Clutching a picture of Anfield our Michael has carried with him from birth, the tears flowing down his face as the sound of Ferry Cross the Mersey blasts around his room…sorry, can I have 5 minutes…. Suddenly, and without warning the door burst open. Enter Freddie Shepherd and several NUFC board members, each clutching automatic weapons. ‘Ve have your daughter Heir Michael.’ announces Evil Freddie. ‘You vill come vith us or she vill die. Muwahahah…muwhahaha.’ So began the disgusting transfer of Michael Mr Liverpool Owen to Newcastle. Bound and gagged, Michael was shoved in the boot of a Merc with the number plate ‘AS ENG1’, hot, miserable, with only the muffled sound of Barbra Streisand’s greatest hits for company. He awoke in the basement of the Evil fortress of St James, tied to a chair with a bright light shone in his face. For hours he was tortured, but he would not sign for the second rate team. It was at this point that Fat Fred wheeled out his secret weapon…Metal Mickey. A fully functioning Michael Owen Android, a Nazi invention programmed to smile, wave with a string of positive vocabulary about NUFC. In that basement he remains, with Rick Parry and Benitez expected to hatch an escape plan when Liverpool visits later in the season.

At the time we thought he was though.

No doubt the Liverpool Echo will report today that Solano was sitting by his phone in North Wales praying Rick Parry would call...

Couldn't agree more. Same goes for that arsehole on Talksport - the Italian who's name escapes me right now. 24467[/snapback] Gabrielle Marcotti, Italian bloke with an American accent and a particular dislike for us. Ruud Gullit was never wrong apparantly 24478[/snapback] Aye, sorry Sima, but the bloke is a twat with some sort of agenda with us. Another journalist who thinks the EPL consists of Chelsea, Arsenal, Manure and some other teams. EDIT: Bollocks, were you being sarcastic?

Shouldn't you be in the delivery room?

I like Paul Daniels. Not a lot.

It's not so bad when you're playing out. But when you play in goal...

Shhhhhhhh...

'Nobby Nob me.'