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Materialism: The "What have you bought?" Thread

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rub the fruit on your bell-end, if it starts to sting then they are ready to eat.

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44, sold my house in Monkseaton 8 years ago, taken me a while to get on the ladder down here.

8 years! Must have been hard not to spend the proceeds on bong in that time.

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I'm still in the paperwork stage of buying my house, my side was done in 2 days, 3 weeks later still waiting on the other parties. I feel like telling them to stick the house up their arse but it would probably be just the same if I found somewhere else.

 

Since me and our lass split up I've got a fair bit more money saved from not paying for meals out and that so I have systematically bought pretty much an entire new wardrobe and about 7 pairs of trainers. Feels good.

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A chilli plant. There's already some chillies on it, how are you supposed to know when they're ready to pick? And how long does it take them to re-fruit?

rub the fruit on your bell-end, if it starts to sting then they are ready to eat.

There's obviously something am missing here :lol:

:whistle:

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A mate of mine, whilst living in Oz, once got started on in the middle of trying to have sex with a girl. She was a bit mental apparently and very odd but he was still interested because tits. Anyway, he was cooking a curry when she came over and before they had a chance to have drinks or eat they were all over each other. He is getting on with the job and slips his fingers in and within seconds she screamed at him and started punching the fuck out of him. He had no idea what was going on, she was repeatedly calling him a cunt, gathered up her stuff and stormed off. Took him about 20 minutes to realise that he had chilli all over his fingers which he had stuffed up her flange.

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A mate of mine, whilst living in Oz, once got started on in the middle of trying to have sex with a girl. She was a bit mental apparently and very odd but he was still interested because tits. Anyway, he was cooking a curry when she came over and before they had a chance to have drinks or eat they were all over each other. He is getting on with the job and slips his fingers in and within seconds she screamed at him and started punching the fuck out of him. He had no idea what was going on, she was repeatedly calling him a cunt, gathered up her stuff and stormed off. Took him about 20 minutes to realise that he had chilli all over his fingers which he had stuffed up her flange.

 

I may be guilty of having done that :blush2: She wasnt imprssed, nor at the suggestion of soaking her minge in milk :blush2:

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I may be guilty of having done that :blush2: She wasnt imprssed, nor at the suggestion of soaking her minge in milk :blush2:

"Stand on tha head, a'll fetch t'cow juice."

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I may be guilty of having done that :blush2: She wasnt imprssed, nor at the suggestion of soaking her minge in milk :blush2:

Who was this? Your lass or Amanda from the payroll dept you fucking fiend?

 

 

 

 

;)

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