Christmas Top Tips

[ewerk 27147]

My top Christmas tip this year for males in or around Newcastle Upon Tyne is to pop into Hollisters in Eldon Square. I nipped in to get a couple of tops for daughter 2002 and the staff were very nice.

You fertile fucker.

[catmag 336]

Question for the parents out there - all gifts for the kids from Santa, a mix from Santa and mum and dad or all from mum and dad.... And perhaps more importantly why?

 

Parents send the money, the bairn leaves the Christmas list with the mince pie and milk/brandy/whatever-your-tipple-of-choice-is and Santa leaves the presents.

 

This is the first year that my son really 'gets it' and I have had to find the balance between making him excited and not freaking him out cos I HATED the fact a man let himself into my house when I was a kid. It terrified me.

[Monkeys Fist 39296]

You big puff.

[catmag 336]

Shut it!

 

I used to cry, refuse to put on my Christmas Eve jarmas and ask my mam to ring Santa and ask him to leave my presents at Grandma's cos I was terrified that he'd look through my window to check if I was asleep

[Christmas Tree 4005]

Question for the parents out there - all gifts for the kids from Santa, a mix from Santa and mum and dad or all from mum and dad.... And perhaps more importantly why?

My family tradition for at least the last 60 years is as follows.

 

Kids get up shit early and come Dow stairs to open presents off Santa in their stockings (bin bag size sacks).

 

All the presents from family, mam and dad, aunties etc have been building up under the tree for the last week or so.

 

After Christmas dinner one person is the giver and hands presents out randomly one at a time and there is a slight pause while the present is ripped open and thank you's and kisses given out. This usually takes about 90 minutes.

 

It was always great as kids having all the Santa stuff on a morning and then being able to get all excited again for the afternoon present giving. I loved it and my kids love it.

[The Fish 9340]

Shut it!

 

I used to cry, refuse to put on my Christmas Eve jarmas and ask my mam to ring Santa and ask him to leave my presents at Grandma's cos I was terrified that he'd look through my window to check if I was asleep

 

 

Filthbag

Edited December 23, 2013 by The Fish

[Christmas Tree 4005]

Shut it!

 

I used to cry, refuse to put on my Christmas Eve jarmas and ask my mam to ring Santa and ask him to leave my presents at Grandma's cos I was terrified that he'd look through my window to check if I was asleep

 

 

We also do the Xmas eve jim jams for the kids.

[Ayatollah Hermione 12944]

 

After Christmas dinner one person is the giver and hands presents out randomly one at a time and there is a slight pause while the present is ripped open and thank you's and kisses given out. This usually takes about 90 minutes.

 

 

Some proper Mafia, kiss the ring business that.

[The Fish 9340]

 

Some proper Mafia, kiss the ring business that.

He'll mackem an offer they can't refuse...

[Tom 13919]

Ooooof

[Tooj 17]

 

Some proper Mafia, kiss the ring business that.

[Gemmill 36207]

My family tradition for at least the last 60 years is as follows.

 

Kids get up shit early and come Dow stairs to open presents off Santa in their stockings (bin bag size sacks).

 

All the presents from family, mam and dad, aunties etc have been building up under the tree for the last week or so.

 

After Christmas dinner one person is the giver and hands presents out randomly one at a time and there is a slight pause while the present is ripped open and thank you's and kisses given out. This usually takes about 90 minutes.

 

It was always great as kids having all the Santa stuff on a morning and then being able to get all excited again for the afternoon present giving. I loved it and my kids love it.

90 minutes. Do you break for half time? That individual approach is a lot of pressure to put on people's present opening reactions. There's only so many times you can feign happiness before it starts to look like a rictus grin.

 

It's bizarre when you hear other people's Christmas rituals, cos you always just assume that the way you do things is the way everyone else does.

[Tooj 17]

It sounds like Christmas at Chevy Chase's.

[Howmanheyman 28068]

It sounds like Christmas at Chevy Chase's.

 

A couple of years ago when my two had been sent to bed on Christmas eve I waited about twenty minutes then tip toed in the hallway to see if I could hear if they were still awake which they were. I then played a YouTube clip on my phone of just bells jingling on a sleigh for about twenty seconds before fading then tip toed back in the living room. I could hear them loudly whispering about hearing Santa and it gave me a big cheesy grin all night and was great the next day when they brought it up.

[Kevin Carr's Gloves 3327]

My 2 year old boy (3 on January 1st) is getting a drumkit (real one) for xmas. What seemed like a good idea at the time is filling me with more and more dread as each minute passes and the day approaches.

[Howmanheyman 28068]

My youngest is getting a keyboard.

 

 

(Which has a 3.5mm jack for earphones.)

[Howmanheyman 28068]

90 minutes. Do you break for half time? That individual approach is a lot of pressure to put on people's present opening reactions. There's only so many times you can feign happiness before it starts to look like a rictus grin.

 

It's bizarre when you hear other people's Christmas rituals, cos you always just assume that the way you do things is the way everyone else does.

As long as he doesn't get pulled off at half time and settles for an orange instead.

[Ayatollah Hermione 12944]

My 2 year old boy (3 on January 1st) is getting a drumkit (real one) for xmas. What seemed like a good idea at the time is filling me with more and more dread as each minute passes and the day approaches.

 

Buy silencer pads immediately.

[Christmas Tree 4005]

Hours and hours of....., . Nice

 

[Ayatollah Hermione 12944]

He's shite. I'd be on there, obliterating toms with a flawless Bill Ward impression. My right foot would be so rapid that the bass pedal itself would burrow into the ground below it. There'd be bits of rogue cymbal everywhere caused by the sheer power of me hitting the crashes. Sheer bedlam basically.

 

My teaching starts from £40 a session.

[Monkeys Fist 39296]

If you had to guess who on this board was a drummer, it'd be you.

[The Fish 9340]

Got loads of traditions at my mam and dads' house.

 

Christmas Eve will see;

One of my sisters and my dad lay the table for the following day,

Me drunkenly wrapping presents at about 2am,

My dad sneaking about the place in his dressing gown and a Santa hat dropping off Christmas Stockings around 2-3am

In the morning we all open our stockings in my parents room

Me and my Dad have a wee dramof which ever whiskey he wants me to try this time

Then we all have lime marmalade on toast with a glass of champagne (tastes fucking weird together, but what can you do?)

My Dad will then begin handing out the presents from under the tree in order while we see off the champagne and then beers or whatever

After those are done, my sisters and I hand out our presents

then the "big presents"

Then food and more booze

Then one of my sisters and her husband and son will leave,

me and the other sister grumble about her while we finish the washing up while Mam and Dad listen to christmas albums

then me and dad will have some more whiskey as we put the world to rights and the women folk chip in with quaint naive opinions

me and him fall asleep as we bore each other into a coma

the girls seize control of the remote and watch the stuff they've recorded throughout the day.

 

 

Sorted.

[Gemmill 36207]

Lime marmalade is criminally underrated (Rose's, I trust -does anyone else make it?). Having it as a staple of your Christmas day routine is fucking bizarre though.

 

Edited December 24, 2013 by Gemmill

[The Fish 9340]

Lime marmalade is criminally underrated (Rose's, I trust -does anyone else make it?). Having it as a staple of your Christmas day routine is fucking bizarre though.

Definitely Rose's.

 

Once had to send sister to get some roses because we couldn't find it, she came back with a family tin of the chocolates. Shouldn't have been surprised, I suppose.

 

 

No idea how that tradition started, but there it is, every year.

 

Also, after everyone has finished off the mountain range of food my mam's made, we've finished off the bottles of wine at the table and we've finished whatever chat we were having, she'll sit back and say, "Well that was lovely, thank you everyone"

 

It's weird the things that become a tradition.

[Ayatollah Hermione 12944]

Think the only tradition we have is Baileys on Christmas Eve because we're a family of secret alcoholics. We used to put bowls of fruit and that out but that's been knocked on the head in recent times. We usually have sausage sandwiches on Christmas morning and we usually take presents one at a time but I think all that's fairly normal carry-on. We never get together as a family anyway like and I'm an only child.