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Holidays 2022


McFaul
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8 minutes ago, Howmanheyman said:

Generally speaking my holiday wankers/nemesis are usually cockney wankers. 

 

latest?cb=20200529211127

 

I was extremely annoyed on the Eurostar the other day when a fat Essex family sat down opposite me, the kid started playing as West Ham on FM2022, they cracked open a few beers - and then started loudly laying into Boris and slagging off Brexit and the Tories to all and sundry. What am I supposed to do with my stereotypes now?! :panic: 

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13 minutes ago, Ayatollah Hermione said:


The English who go abroad and will hunt high and low for things they can get at home boil my piss. Was in a beach bar the other day and some grim as fuck Scousers walked in and one ordered a pie and chips with gravy ffs. All I could think was “Fuck off to Benidorm”

 

"Forgive them, for they have literally never eaten anything that isn't pie and chips with gravy"

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48 minutes ago, Renton said:

 

I need alcohol before I get on a plane. Or diazepam if its work related. Coffee would be my idea of hell, just increase my anxiety. Don't see anything wrong with medicating like this as long as you don't overdo it obviously. And yeah, for me the holiday starts once I'm through security. 

 

When my kids were young, flying back from Italy they were right pains in the arse kicking the seats in front etc. Not a lot I could do apart from distraction etc. Next day in the Supermarket, an older couple came up to me and said do you remember us? I was fairly scoobied as to who they were, until they said really pissed off " We remember you and your kids from the flight". Miserable old cunts, careful wykiki, don't let this be you! 


I have serious sympathy for people with bairns on flights, especially long distance.  I don't have kids but have travelled with my nephew and it's hard!  When it comes to nippers I have patience.  It's the thick as fuck adults who cannot follow simple common sense. 

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2 hours ago, Renton said:

 

I need alcohol before I get on a plane. Or diazepam if its work related. Coffee would be my idea of hell, just increase my anxiety. Don't see anything wrong with medicating like this as long as you don't overdo it obviously. And yeah, for me the holiday starts once I'm through security. 

 

When my kids were young, flying back from Italy they were right pains in the arse kicking the seats in front etc. Not a lot I could do apart from distraction etc. Next day in the Supermarket, an older couple came up to me and said do you remember us? I was fairly scoobied as to who they were, until they said really pissed off " We remember you and your kids from the flight". Miserable old cunts, careful wykiki, don't let this be you! 

 

got a midnight flight from zurich to bangkok enroute to sydney when me lad was 6. in the departure lounge he demanded a drink so I took him to the shop and told him to choose what he wanted out the fridge. he opted for red bull and being knackered I never even give it a thought, just bought it.

he was like the tasmanian devil on coke still by the time we were crossing india.

wife never spoke to me for about 3 days.

:(

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All my 6 year old did when we arrived in Melbourne was throw up all over me. Must have been the dog nuggets at Maccas on the stopover in Singapore. team america vomit GIF

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38 minutes ago, RobinRobin said:

All my 6 year old did when we arrived in Melbourne was throw up all over me. Must have been the dog nuggets at Maccas on the stopover in Singapore. team america vomit GIF


i was flying into SF after a 10 hour flight with my one year old. She spewed up all over me as we were coming into land. She was too little to have her own seat and I had her on my lap and wasn’t allowed to remove her. We were then stuck on the runway for 45 minutes before spending a couple of hours getting through security. Fucking hell, I stunk like a tramp. By the time I got to the front of the queue at the car rental place I wasn’t confident they’d give me a motor - I looked and smelt worse than Bill Storey

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2 hours ago, Renton said:

 

I once had a romantic gondola ride in Venice and the gondolier was like a fucking fascist racist version of CT, wouldn't keep his mouth shut. Kept on singing the praises of Burlesconi and making thrusting actions at the wife. As an English coward, I just politely smiled. 


That’s just made me spit my coffee out all over Costa’s fake mahogany table  you’ve painted a scene worthy of any carry on film :lol:

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13 hours ago, Dr Gloom said:


i was flying into SF after a 10 hour flight with my one year old. She spewed up all over me as we were coming into land. She was too little to have her own seat and I had her on my lap and wasn’t allowed to remove her. We were then stuck on the runway for 45 minutes before spending a couple of hours getting through security. Fucking hell, I stunk like a tramp. By the time I got to the front of the queue at the car rental place I wasn’t confident they’d give me a motor - I looked and smelt worse than Bill Storey

The only top I had readily available to change into was the jersey I had needed in the snow in Newcastle before we left. It was 40 degrees in Melbourne! 

Sweating Patrick Star GIF by SpongeBob SquarePants

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Just been in a restaurant in Milan. The walls had graffiti on from customers. Two couples near us, Mackems. 

 

'Mate you got a marker pen?' 

 

 I bet you can't guess what hashtag they wrote. 

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I took some Italian lessons years ago then been doing duo lingo last year or so. Tried to speak today in a shop and the women spoke so fast she saw how shocked I was and said 'English?' 🤣

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There was an Italian wedding in our hotel yesterday. Total opposite to a standard brit wedding. All good looking all well dressed. A decent disco but I didnt see anyone absolutely smashed at all. 

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1 hour ago, wykikitoon said:

There was an Italian wedding in our hotel yesterday. Total opposite to a standard brit wedding. All good looking all well dressed. A decent disco but I didnt see anyone absolutely smashed at all. 


Tim And Eric Smile GIF

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