Howmanheyman

If Burnley can hold out Wolves and Everton get at least a three goal scudding that would be canny.

Looks like Southampton are on the beach, even Burnley beat them.

Leyzus for me, marra. FTM.

I still think Burnley are going down rather than Everton but it'll be because Burnley have played more and are still shite rather than anything Everton do.

'lopsided stadiums' as a thread.

Worked with a lad in the 90s who got nicknamed 'Turkish Delight' as he was well in with a gaffer and would even meet up and get the metro back to Gateshead after the game. The gaffer's name was Easton so the lad was obviously 'full of Easton promise'. (He got the job he was after).

Was about to post similar, the mail basically saying that the bloke is honey trap waiting to happen. Imagine if he was at a party in Italy hosted by Russians with links to the Kremlin when he was foreign secretary and then imagine if he went there without any security and got pissed? I'm sure he'd have been scrupulously professional.

I don't know which is more tragic, Murphy's one-on-ones or wykiki texting with his gaffer on a Saturday night? I was just laughing at Bruno watching motd last night, he's the real deal and you just knew that one-on-one with Krul was going nowhere but the back of the net, the only question was which way he was going to go about it?

Happy to confirm our superiority.

Bruno is pure sex, like. That through ball to Jigsaw Murphy was sublime but not as sublime as his finish. I was actually laughing as he approached Krul as you just knew he wasn't going to fuck it up, the complete opposite feeling to when Murphy is one on one. Right, two things are obvious by now, one, VAR are fucking DYING to find something against us, that was fucking ridiculous, about five passes before the goal, it's onside and they're still having a good fucking look, you just don't see that in other games to the same extent. Two, If you want ASM to pass on tap simply inform the supporters to olé every pass. Right, I'm off to crack on with Gemma on the DAZN party line........

I can see why he's rotated for freshness tbh but I'm not convinced with the lineup and hate not having a CF in the side. Home win is what I thought could happen and I'm probably leaning more towards that now than before I saw the team. Up to them to show me I'm wrong.

'There's a North East team that's going to need a bigger stadium of sixty five thousand, Chris Kamara, which one is it?"

Wtf?

Have a feeling we'll get beat today as Norwich can sometimes play a bit and can take advantage if we're knackered from Wednesday night. If we're on it and nullify them in the middle and the legs are still there then I fancy us. (Just not 5-0).

Lose we bad, win we good. 5-0.

KCG's tale reminds me of a joke about a former soldier going for a job interview with Newcastle City council. The manager tells him that he's going to be offered the job as they like to support ex-armed servicemen. He asks if he has any medical conditions they should know about? The former squaddie says he lost his testicles in the Falklands and also has a caffeine allergy. The manager replies, "Ok, that shouldn't be a massive problem for you here. We start at nine and finish at five but you can start at eleven instead." The squaddie asks why? The manager says, "Well here at the council we just sit around drinking coffee and scratching our balls for the first couple of hours so pointless you coming in to be honest."

Not a limbs disability but I do remember a former manager who was a guide for the brewery tours who apparently had a colostomy bag in his side. His nickname was 'The Northumbrian Piper'.

+1 I honestly think any therapist I would see would either slap me or need to see their own therapist afterwards like Dr Melfi.

Heard about a bloke with one leg a little bit shorter than his other leg from someone who worked with them. His head would bobble slightly from one side to the other as he walked. His nickname was 'Sniper's Nightmare'.

You're a very naughty boy!

Howay the Hinnies!

I really hope we get our youth set up as strong as we can as apart from it being a no brainer financially it would be funny as fuck if we drew the mackems again in the Papa John's Sherpa van full members trophy and our U 23 team beat their first team.

Totally get that he might not be player of the season but the difference and balance he's brought to the side has been massive, there's no doubt in my mind that opposition managers targeted our left side but they've had very little joy since Targett arrived and I give him massive kudos for our last minute winner v Leicester.

Can't argue with a few players which is testament to the players themselves and the manager and coaches who've obviously pressed the right buttons. (Can't discount the fact that some players will be knowing the tossing it off days are gone and have refocused their attitudes). Anyway, it's been a bugbear of mine for ages and it's happened in other seasons but under Ashley we've sometimes decided that left backs are a subject that divides football, 99.9% reckon a team should have one and NUFC think we'll be ok without. Our left side absolutely killed us up till Howe coming in and Targett has been solid just about every game at the very least, struggling to think of a time I've got really nervous when he's on the ball and he's a knack of winning possession with tackles out of nowhere. Others will have just as good claims and I wouldn't dispute it really but he's made an absolute difference especially when he's sometimes had ASM in front of him not always being on the ball for helping out.

One of the comments.....'He's wearing Barry Taylor's shorts'