ewerk

I mean I’m not a big fan of their genocide but you have to hand it to them, that was ingenious.

Last season we were in the CL. That was the time to come out with the dodgy deals and try to explain everything away by saying we're a CL club now. Instead it looks like we're far to scared to even test the associated party rules and the taps of untold wealth. For example, why are our shirt deals worth nearly half of Tottenham's?

Where's @trooper at these days?

Well that’s your own fault. Having picked Newcastle as your English side no one would have begrudged you choosing Bayern as your German team.

We didn't make Isak into a £100m player. He joined us after the season had already started and was a one in two striker for us immediately. Likewise Bruno and Botman took no time to adjust. We paid less for them than their true value. The transfer market is the very definition of an imperfect market otherwise there would be no point in trying to get the best scouts.

The Coutinho transfer was the deal of the century for Liverpool. It's like someone offering us £180m for Bruno. You wouldn't want to see him go but you'd snap their hands off for the money.

You can underpay for a player just as you can overpay for a player. You're not just buying a player on current form but on potential, which is what we have done and of course it takes coaching to see those players fulfil that potential.

You've got the wrong bog trotter, I'm strictly a 4x4 man. It was Ant that drove the Mazda MX5.

See this is why you're a so called accountant and I work in business. You can't just look at the outgoings and say 'we're spending too much'. The person we should all be turning our attention to is Peter Silverstone, the man with what should be the easiest job in the world: commercial director for Newcastle United. Man City can reach down the back of the sofa and come up with a few commercial deals worth tens of millions yet he hasn't been able to replicate that even though our owner is literally the dictator of one of the world's wealthiest countries.

Oh so now we shouldn't have signed Isak? Honest to god, some of you deserved Mike Ashley. It's time to take your picture of Lee Charnley down off the wall. We signed Isak for £60m and he's now worth at least £100m. That means we got a £100m player for much less than his true value. That is good business. The same goes with Gordon, Bruno and Botman. If we were bidding nearly £70m for Guehi then clearly we did have money to spend this summer, it just wasn't spent. I've been saying for years that we need to become like Liverpool and Man City where we bring through young players and even if they don't make the first team then we sell them for good money. That isn't rocket science but no one can expect that system to be implemented and start showing results in two years.

Also, while I'm taking you to school, who have we bought at peak age and peak price? Look at our most expensive transfers, they were all at the age where they can improve and most of them have increased in value and the others definitely have the potential to do so.

The first paragraph is mostly nonsense. Of course the first team is going to be the priority given the complete lack of quality that the new regime inherited. The plan was never to be a Brighton and build slowly over seven or eight years. We have signed plenty of young players but it is rare to see a return on that investment within just a couple of years, Minteh being the exception. If this cunt wants us to be another Spurs where he was happy to see their best players sold off for big money then he's at the wrong club. That sort of strategy will never bring success.

Read this again and tell me where I'm wrong. "'I think it's difficult coming into a predefined strategy,' he said. 'Should our scouting and recruitment be driven more extensively with a wider reaching net? It definitely should, because this is becoming a really nuanced space now, when you can't just capitally fund everything every year and buy loads of players at peak age and peak price. Of course it needs to be, and that's the responsibility of me, the scouting team and Eddie. 'Is it fit for purpose? Not last winter gone, the winter before that. Is it fit for purpose in the modern game? Because other clubs that have adopted a different approach over time, with more intelligence, more data-informed than we are, actually prospered in this window. That's where we have to grow to be now. 'You look at the money we have invested up to this point, £250 million net over the last two-and-a-half years. Was our model in place to be able to spend more to the levels we would have liked to enhance the team? I don't think it was, because we haven't sold a player during that time, barring what we were forced to do through PSR. 'We didn't have the sales window we thought we would have – and we have to look at that strategy as well, was that right? It was all aligned with the head coach. There definitely has to be a more strategic approach that we haven't had the last two-and-a-half years. I'll know whether we've done a good job in five years' time.' Mitchell did not refer to Guehi by name, but said that Howe did not want to pursue other targets. 'We had a player as the key, core target,' he said. 'We were still in dialogue (with Palace) all the way through, but Eddie was very clear, and it's not up to me after seven weeks to say, "We'll do this and that", because I'm in a supporting role. 'There were (other) targets. Could there have been more? I would say potentially. But Eddie was very clear that he had to feel comfortable that the person added value, because we have really good players. That's why we ended up where we did. 'And he's smart, he was engaged in all the conversations about PSR, spend, cost, cash-flow, he's a smart head coach that has the capacity to be kept updated on those conversations. And that was the decision he took - it was that player, or he felt that he was comfortable with the quality that we have."

In that case he should have been specific in that he meant the system pre-takeover. Because he sounded like he was saying everything was shit before he arrived and he was going to fix Howe’s mistakes.

Yeah, I was agreeing with you about that.

The car has a 75kwh battery. A screen uses maybe 10 watts max so you could basically run the screen for nearly a year from that battery. Maybe ask your joiner if he knows any decent sparks to explain it to you.

Also, I see the bastards are doing away with the free road tax for electric cars and applying the VED supplement from next year. So much for a move to net zero.

Given the size of the battery a small screen playing is negligble.

Nah, salary sacrifice is deducted before tax so you're paying less income tax. Your point about the pension contributions stands though.

Ah a fellow Celebrity Catchphrase fan. You’re a man of fine taste.

Never seen it.

Fucking hell.