bobbyshinton

Should that not be great business SBR and Sourmess?

theiving bastards, was not even smutty Do I need to repost or have I breached regulations?

Shocking that I named one of my cats Keegan.

The strange person who takes photos of total strangers. Why don't all take a photo now and post it. Mine is going to be from my office window.

An old man, Mr. Goldstein, was living the last of his life in a nursing home. One day he appeared to be very sad and depressed. Nurse Tracy asked if there was anything wrong. "Yes, Nurse Tracy," said Mr. Goldstein, my Private Part died today, and I am very sad." Knowing her patients were forgetful and sometimes a little crazy, she replied, "Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Goldstein, please accept my condolences." The following day, Mr. Goldstein was walking down the hall with his Private Part hanging out his pajamas, when he met Nurse Tracy. "Mr. Goldstein," she said, "You shouldn't be walking down the hall like that.. Please put your Private Part back inside your pajamas." But, Nurse Tracy," replied Mr. Goldstein, " I told you yesterday that my Private Part died." "Yes, you did tell me that, but why is it hanging out of your pajamas?" . . . . . . . . . . "Well," he replied, "Today's the viewing."

But I take pics of peoples' tattoos in the street. Do you ask them if you can? you're the bastard

apartments

From BBC site Sisters arrested for abusing fans A twin sister pop duo were arrested for launching a foul-mouthed tirade at football fans during a derby match at Sheffield's Hillsborough stadium. Francine and Nicola Gleadall, 18, hit back at away fans who jeered as they performed at half-time in Saturday's Sheffield Wednesday-Barnsley match. One of the singers shouted obscenities which were amplified around the ground, while the other flicked V-signs. The pair were arrested and issued with £80 fixed penalties, police confirmed. The identical twins were at Hillsborough to sing their single - a cover of Slade's 1970s hit Cum on Feel the Noize - in front of the 28,687 crowd. 'Threatening behaviour' But Barnsley supporters began hurling abuse after the stadium announcer introduced them as "two girls from Sheffield". A South Yorkshire police spokeswoman said: "Two 18-year-old local women entertainers were arrested by police during a Championship football match in Sheffield on Saturday. "Both received £80 fixed penalties for public order offences." A joint statement from Sheffield Wednesday and South Yorkshire police said: "We operate a policy of enforcement against threatening behaviour in the ground to prevent escalation into more serious offending." The rest of game, which Sheffield Wednesday won 2-1, passed without incident, police added.

I agree it just not worth it, You lose out on thousands as soon as you take the bastard thing out of the showroom...best to wait for depreciation I always do, never bought a new car like... Joy-rides and hub-cap removal, on the other hand... ha ha how did you guess? BTW Im not one of those scallies I know. Scallies, Andy McNab Andy Mcnab, what's he got to do with scousers?? Nicholls

I'm here

In the Old days Sunday was a dead day, no shops open, restricted drinking. Is there places in Wales and Scotland for example still like that and do you live in a place like that. Me Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalsend never closes, it's a modern day Vegas

A bit rude / offensive A little boy goes shopping with his mother and is waiting right outside of the dressing room door. While waiting the little boy gets bored and just when his Mom comes walking out, she sees her son sliding his hand up a mannequin's skirt. "Get your hand out of there!" she shouts. "Don't you know that women have teeth down there?" The little boy quickly snatches his hand away and thanks his lucky stars he didn't get bitten. For the next ten years, this little boy grows up believing all women have teeth between their legs. When he's 16, he gets a girlfriend. One night, while her parents are out of town, she invites him over for a little action. After an hour of making out and grinding on the sofa, she says," You know, you could go a little further if you want." "What do you mean?" he asks. "Well, why don't you put your hand down there?" she says, pointing to her crotch. "HELL NO," he cries, "you've got teeth down there!" "Don't be ridiculous," she responds, "there's no such thing as teeth down there!" "Yes, there are," he says, "my Mom told me so." "No, there aren't," she insists. "Here, look for yourself." With that, she pulls down her pants and gives him a little peek. "No, I'm sorry" he says. "My Mom already told me that all women have teeth down there." "Oh for crying out loud!" she cries. She whips off her panties, throws her legs behind her head and says, "LOOK,I DON'T have any teeth down there." The boy takes a good long look and replies, . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . "Well, after seeing the condition of those gums, I'm not surprised!" that's a bit rude

I agree it just not worth it, You lose out on thousands as soon as you take the bastard thing out of the showroom...best to wait for depreciation I always do, never bought a new car like... Joy-rides and hub-cap removal, on the other hand... ha ha how did you guess? BTW Im not one of those scallies I know. Scallies, Andy McNab

I havn't, whats it like.

That's Gemmill in about 30 years time! 5

already had a few, waiting for woor lass ganin to have a few more

Two old age pensioners are having a 69. After 5 minutes he says "Sorry luv the smell's too bad down there - I can't carry on." "That'll be my athritis" she says. "What? I never heard of anyone having arthritis in thier fanny before." No she says . . . . . . . . . . . . . . "It's in my arms and hands... and I can't wipe me arse."

Shut it Augustus Gloop! Christ, 3 unprovoked insults from Alex alone today and it's not 10 o'clock yet! Rento me man, say mmmmmmmmmmmmm Betty I think I found a new spot for you

Friday 13th

Would I have to do that with my jokes? I could imagine very loud bouts of laughter could get you sacked along with fuck me thats brill, well done Bobby at the top of your voice. Think before you post G man

As you know I'm a comic genius, vast ammounts of material. So I have decided to do a sit com, using what I know of people on here I have provisionally casted a few for roles. Here goes Jim Royle type character .... Rob W Arkwright, tight with money, grumpy always trying to get into the nurses kit. .......... The G man Nurse Emanuel ......... Sorry Cat Joey Boswell type, stylish always got money on the hip .........Chez Granville, plagued and abused by Arkwright................Renton Nigel Planer type charachter in the young ones................Tkeith I need some more any suggestions? Later I will be casting for a soap opera

is that in North East? We might work with you

TT NO .Com sky sports BBC news

Lets go. Coach leaves at 10.00 should get there by 10.0000000000001

Drop your abucus?