Meenzer

Just recovering from a healthy lunch of chocolate, chocolate and more chocolate. Roast dinner to follow.

I like my coffee like I don't like my men: big, black, strong and sugar-free. As for tea, stick one "normal" teabag and one Earl Grey in a mug and brew for five minutes minimum before adding a splash of milk but no sugar. What's the deal with office tarts in this country who think that sugary, milky water with 30 seconds' worth of tea infusion in any way constitutes an acceptable drink?

Schnelsen or Moorfleet? I've never known the former be anything but hellish. And I used to need about four U-Bahns and buses to get there from my old haunt. Should have just got a cab really. Cracking meatballs though. Mancy knows I'm a fan.

It's fine here - twatface

I can only imagine how much that euphemism is overdone in your South London loveshack. See, I just knew that would happen, it was only a question of who'd get there first. Wacky and Smoothie are obviously busy with a laundry list of domestic chores today.

You should try doing the "hurdy-gurdy-hurdy-gurdy" Swedish voice around my mother if you ever see her at the match. She'll embed a gin glass in your skull before you can say "lutefisk".

OK then, I'll revise that to "All sports should take advice consisting of ideas they've already come up with".

I shall be honouring the "fish on Good Friday" tradition by preparing a meal of Jansson's Temptation, a Swedish anchovy and potato bake. Served alongside a huge pile of Swedish meatballs, natch.

All sports should take advice from people who don't actually watch them.

Gosh. It's almost like the authorities got something right for once.

I'd rather have a vote on who will overtake anyone else more than 5 times in the entire season, it's more interesting. Takuma Sato, obviously.

Of course! Now if they can just take a couple of decades off Murray Walker and make an animatronic version of James Hunt, I can pretend I'm 8 years old again and F1 is still interesting and unpredictable, and all will be right with the world.

I could live without both of them, to be honest. But yep, should be good news. No more having to switch to RTL during the ad breaks

That's how they should have spun the whole "offering 125% mortgages to people with dodgy credit histories and properties worth 7x their annual income" thing IYAM.

Ok, thanks Martin. With Amazon I could only find VHS copies? Oh, right. Sorry. I didn't look that closely. I'm trying to think if I know any friendly Finns in my circle of Eurovision freaks who'd order it, send it on to you and accept a PayPal cash infusion in return...

Really wanna see those fingers Also a fine show.

That's your girlfriend, that is.

I keep purgin', keep keep purgin' love...

Yep, but the fact is she absolutely LOVES the all press coverage. If they did actually ignore her there'd be a spectacular "suicide" attempt within a month. She should taser herself for added effect.

He's in a battered plaice now.

The (clearly) cheapest one doesn't seem to have a Swedish version, and I think the second one on the list only ships to Finland. After that it starts getting pricier... Amazon.com appear to have plenty of used copies from US$4.41 upwards, not sure what postage to Oz would be like though.

Right, I'm off to the pub. Zywiec overdose ahoy! Howay the lads.

Keeghole Surgery. Keeg West. Maybe not.

34p for first, 24p for second. No idea if that's an increase since Christmas though. http://www.postoffice.co.uk/portal/po/jump...ediaId=19100177 is your friend. EDIT: Ah.

Happy Face's aunty will be gutted. But penalty-takers on the other two teams will be thrilled. Sorry to hear that though. I could resolve to speak German all weekend in an attempt to keep the Teutonic element intact. (Or we could all just consume insane amounts of Zywiec in lieu of invading Poland.) I should be there with my fella, anyway - count me in for the footie too, he'll stand on the balcony with Cath and point and laugh.