BigWalrus

It was on Radio 2 the other night, so presumably it has some basis in fact.

Must be a piss take. But it's brilliant nonetheless. Reminds me of a story a mate told me, about a lad who rang up Babestation and discussed Shearer's receding hairline with the lass on the screen.

Looks like a dog version of Max Clifford

Most centre backs would as good strikers tend to be pacier. We were caught out (on both occasions) playing too high up the pitch. The Suarez goal was more down to a brilliant first touch from Suarez. Last night's was just raw pace. I don't think any of our other defenders would have fared better unfortunately.

http://www.chroniclelive.co.uk/newcastle-united/nufc-news/2012/11/08/dutch-league-ace-admits-newcastle-united-interest-72703-32192301/ Normally would ignore such an article, but it does appear to have quotes from the bloke himself.

Douglas is talking up his availability too. Available to discuss a pre-contract agreement in January and mentions us.

Snap.

That's a frightening statistic, if you're a mackem. It's unbelievable.

Carroll would love to score against us. However, Coloccini being out isn't necessarily too bad against these lot, as their aerial approach should be a piece of piss for Taylor and Williamson to deal with. Williamson did a decent job against Carroll at Anfield last season, considering the number of crosses they put in for him.

Fucking hell, some of those are horrendous!

All true - but we've also been without Tiote and Coloccini for much of the start this year, we've been without Krul for a canny few games and we've had the burden of extra Europa League games to contend with. Once Tiote and Coloccini have finished their self inflicted bans, I'd hope we will be able to get a bit of a run going. Our first XI is superb, but we've had a real issue in getting them all together at any point so far this season.

To put some meat on the bones, have a look at our games in the first few months of last season. For West Brom at home this season - read Wigan at home last season. Mackems away was similar last year except we held out last season, but otherwise a fairly similar performance. QPR away was awful last season. Wolves had a perfectly good goal disallowed in the last minute which would have denied us all three points. All I'm saying is that the performances aren't really that different from last season's first few months. Take off a couple of jammy moments in those games (like QPR missing sitter after sitter, Wolves having a goal chalked off, Rodalegga missing 3 one on ones at home Wigan) and the points aren't even that far off. Things went our way in the first few months of the season - big style.

Not in terms of points, in terms of general playing style. We weren't playing well. We were scraping results.

I'm not panicking. We started poorly last season too. All we need to do is ensure we're firmly in the chasing pack (behind Man Utd and Man City) meaning that if we hit form, we can pull away. Once we get something resembling our first choice XI together and also manage to coax some form out of Cisse, I'm convinced that we'll hit form. The rest of the league are all drawing with each other / taking turns to beat each other. Despite our iffy form, we're still in a canny position in the league. We're still on course for a finish between 4th and 8th, which is within my expectations. As an added bonus, we're not doing too shabbily in the Europa League either.

Very true. Plus, the game has moved on from having wingers belting up and down whipping crosses in. Very few top sides will play with two wingers consistently, as it’s so easy to then over run them in midfield.

Ferguson at left back (against Man Utd) was possibly the weakest defensive performance since Danny Simpson at Anfield last season.

'a dry area of land between rivers and marshland' That's what I would refer to as the gooch.

Dunno about that like. I've watched three of four of their games this season, and their tactics consisted of passing the ball back to James Collins, who would then lump it up to Carroll for a flick on. They're quick at closing people down in midfield mind, I'll give them that.

Newcastle is named as such because there is a castle in the city. Where is the corresponding ham from which West Ham gets its name?

I wish Coloccini had broken Suarez's legs. Waste of a perfectly good red card!

Fair, and spot on.

I love the auto links - someone mentions that Cattermole was head and shoulders above anyone else, and you are provided with a link to anti-dandruff shampoo. Not saying the combat of unsightly dandruff is a bad thing, but it's going off on something of a tangent.

Serves you right for wearing revealing clothing.

Wor lass's mam was talking about a bloke she used to work with when she was a 17 year old (in the early 70s). She said that whenever they were alone in the lift, he'd stick his hand up her skirt and have a go. She'd push him away, but it did nothing to stem the tide. He was known for being like this amongst the rest of the staff, but people would just laugh it off. She reckons it was "just like that" back then. Seems like they could pretty much pick names out of hats at the minute.

Seems to have taken everyone by surprise, judging by the people who they interviewed on Look North.