Renton

I mean, I quite like Danny Boyle films generally, but any plus for that is wiped out by the presence of Ed Sheeran. This film was just poor in both concept and implementation. IMDb agrees (6.8, a point too high imo). I made the point the owther week/month that film quality is just poor across the board now. I think Rom Coms, CT's favourite genre, probably more so than most.

Talking of poop, any tips on how to collect it for this colon screening test? The test specifically says do not let the sample be contaminated with toilet water. So I carefully laid down TP in order to catch it, but it was so strong and magnificant it just went straight through it. I'll need another 12 hours for another attempt. PLEASE DO NOT THINK OF THIS BEFORE YOU HAVE YOUR LUNCH BAIT. Just saying.

What's your position relative to him at work? I mean honestly, I'd suggest he should be dismissed. Why hasn't he? Is he amazing at what he does or soemthing?

Yeah, it's specific to our coastal location I think. The smart meters connect through some low frequency radio wave shit which doesn't reliably reach us, so they can't be commissioned. The engineer comes out, does his shit that doesn't work, sucks his teeth, and says he's had the same issue with everyone in our area. Then the next one comes out two months later, the same. So why fucking bother you dippits? (the provider admin, not the engineers). Last one said it could be fixed by attaching some huge aerial, but they never got back to us on that. I mean, I could understand this if we lived in Craster or somewhere, but we're smack in the middle of a conurbation here. Good thing is we're with Octopus now as well and they are much. much better than those french cunts EDF.

I see those brown envelopes still aren't doing the job, after all that effort we put into flooding the pitch at Wimbledon too.

In the parallel universe of Weardside, a MLF imagines it is NUFC who William Storey stalks and not SAFC*. * As well as create another multi-page thread full of the usual mysogny and racism.

I wonder how long it will be until they start upsetting themselves that this is true?

Funnily enough I was going to suggest cote dazure to young AH there. France is massively underrated imo, love it there. But they stopped the easyjet flight from NCL to Nice so it's not that accessible from here now. Bordeaux SW France the same. Haven't been for years myself but a colleague who does about 8 foreign jaunts a year goes to Bilbao loads. It's her favourite place despite all the locals hating Geordies. She's a massive foody. Flys from Edinburgh.

I'll sum up the mackem logic from that thread.

They win a few matches, and this mass delusion comes out. They are insane.

Andw what's more, Taylor Swift is going to take up residency at the SoL during the wedding season.

First, fuck you Fish. Second, this is just

Footballers are fucking pathetic nowadays. Cancelled the match because of a divot? I've heard it all now.

Alright, alright, calm down mate. You still sound ace.

Jesus Christ, just seen this from the boxing gig. Imagine paying hundreds of pounds to listen to this tone death cunt play in a stadium? He's fucking terrible.

Stranger things have happened.

Ahh, right. GLoom, you may proceed.

Eh? Is Tuesday's match off then?

Had on, tbd had a thread and when it was pointed out to him it wasn't the next match, he gracefully got it deleted or put in stasis (unsure which). Sorry Gloom, this is a code brown breach of protocol. Desist now.

A draw is good for us, it'll be tight at the top between us three come May won't it lads. Lads?

Roy Keane looks like a fucking psycho there.

Crazy stats for the losing side. I'm not that arsed. It's boring as fuck Man City and Pep winning the league all the time but like all sane people I like the play mobil about as much as standing barefoot on a well, play mobil. Basically bored by city and hate everyone else.

Yeah, done that, a completely pointless and shit experience. I will never understand the appeal of stadium gigs of any description. Maybe the exception is for an entire festival, involving free sex and drugs for the youngsters amongst us (hello, is anyone there?). Pay a fortune to watch a giant out of synch LCD telly with the added bonus of being charged ten quid for a pint of piss and being surrounded by coked up wankers. You would need to pay ME a fairly large sum of money to watch Oasis. Still, you get to tick it off your bucket list I suppose.

I'd watch it but so far it's just advertised as being shown at an iMax? Can hardly think of a film less suited to the big screen like. Each pixel. Will be 4 metres wide.

Good old fashioned jawdee Arabia punishment, I like it.