Dr Kenneth Noisewater

The thieves out of the title race due to a deflection off a beachball. Beatiful. Just the thought of what Phil Thompsons reaction might have been gives me a warm fuzzy feeling.

Gallows humour has long been a coping mechanism in this emotionally repressed old country of ours. You must occasionally use it yourself in your profession?

I'm thinking of applying for government funding to find out if bears shit in the woods.

I think you're on to something there. The Scottish have made some of the greatest inventions in history. And their diet largely consists of deep fried beef dripping, apparently Much of made of the deep-fried Mars Bar but the deep-fried pizza is far more excessive iyam. They also do something up there which is called a stobie or a stogie I think: A chip shop sausage, wrapped in donner meat, dipped in batter, then deep-fried. Heart attack on a stick tbh.

The dad wants invoicing for the emergency services costs, fucking idiot.

I was raping a woman last night and she cried "Please, think of my children!" Kinky bitch.

Publicity stunt I reckon.

This just gets better and better.... log into Facebook and what message do I have? What a spastic that lad is.

What's the best method of downloading flash video?

Fight The Power A Kind of Magic Simply The Best The One And Only Walking on the Moon Personal Jesus Epic Bittersweet Symphony I Want You Back Unbelievable Livin La Vida Loca Missing You I Will Always Love You Nothing Compares To You Baby One More Time

Do you still have your Vauxhall Astra 'sports car' Thompers?

Pulmonary oedema was mentioned on the BBC News, possibly caused by breathing something in. Could Poppers do that?

They've put the toll up recently as well haven't they? The Humber Bridge hasn't paid for itself after nearly 30 years btw.

I don't have the disease but I've had the syndrome before. I'd been bodyboarding in Cornwall and it got a bit chilly. Hands went so white they were almost translucent, combined with quite a painful pins & needles / numb sensation. I've had it when scraping ice off the windscreen then holding a cold steering wheel on winter mornings too.

What's pink and goes round & round on a carousel? Steven Gately's suitcase.

It's matt and perfectly functional. Just read a review on the new NC20 which apparently has a superb screen. It's supposed to be a good compromise between netbook and laptop, costs about £370. Good, can't abide glossy reflect-o-rama screens. Oh, Doctor, the shiny ones are the best Even the worst news is much better on a shiny screen. As long as you haven't got your back to the window. Or the light on.

The bit about having to sing "I'm a gaylord" to the tune of "Like a Virgin" was funny.

Leazes will know I think, gets the stuff for his currys there iirc.

Full credit to him for beating AIDS.

Drugs 6/5 AIDS 9/4

Was it this: windows live photo gallery ?

Just found out Stewart Francis is supporting him, superb gag-teller and pun artist:

It's like the uefa cup experiment of having two extra linesmen: How do they think they can cut out human error by including two extra humans?

Disappointing last night after the previous two episodes. At least The Johnson and Big Suze made a re-appearance.

The ones from around 7:40 that peel back must leave a nasty exit wound.