Ayatollah Hermione

Got to say, quite refreshing to see us all on the same page with no contrary bollocks about how she was the shining light of England. A lovely little den of cynicism we have here

Hope graft have got some overtime on, I’d rather be at bastard work

Ridiculous crack, that. Insane that we’re expected to just sit quietly for 2 weeks because 15% of the population convince themselves to be sad. Well, I’ll be getting pissed and they can’t stop me

That’s £1 million a month if you’re struggling, CT

Use Spotify’s web player with a good ad-blocker and you should be good to go. Lose a bit of functionality because the web player is shit but I did it for a few month when I was cutting back

Im sure the crown will match those charitable donations. Maybe they can siphon a bit from the SIX BILLION POUND funeral she’ll be having. Bit of a smaller spread at the wake

The Smiths should capitalise on this in a Kate Bush-esque moment of relevance and put The Queen is Dead out as a single.

Could have sworn he was in the TA or some other shite for a bit when he was younger Mandela effect

Prepare for both parties to engage in sickening POWER GRIEF. Starmer is ex-military, they’ll never top him. Those lot are the top of the pops when it comes to royal love-ins

Like a student reading out her homework in front of the class

Truss trying her best to come across as genuine and human and failing quite terribly

The Gone-arch, more like

Are they worried she’s going to rise like the undead?

I’m off for a Chinese tonight since they’ll be the only ones staying open. They simply do not care; the bombs could be falling and they’d still whip you some bait up

Could be an interesting night to be in Belfast, as I currently am. I will send what updates I can back to Tanland

Easiest job in the world. Even easier than third choice goalkeeper

Leave Buckingham Palace abandoned so we don’t have to pay the gas bill

Aye, I’m not sure Shearer would write all that forced grandiose bollocks off his own back just needed some posh boy forced swearing to complete the Caulkin bingo card

Have a feeling that the England job may be Steve Cooper’s lifeline out of Forest come January.

He’s better than Darlow but worse than Dubravka but the latter was probably never going to sit on the bench anyway. Happy enough with that as our back-up tbh

Could use the same theme song tbf

Howe wouldn’t even entertain it, I reckon. Just moved his family for a start but why would he go to a club with less resources smdh?

I do hope Potter doesn’t have his head turned. Would quite like to see Brighton give it a proper bash this season without instantly losing their players or manager to one of the “big boys”

Aye, the current implementation is absolutely great. Shame that we can only sign players with size 7 feet so you’re not offside by a toe.