Ayatollah Hermione

Did Bobby Robson not say if he got his hands on him, he'd strangle him? Or was that Zenden when he said he'd sign for us and went to Chelsea? Chelsea: Attracting Bellends since 1905.

throw a "Motherfucker!" on the end of that for me.

Peter The Oven had to stop five miles earlier for a family emergency sadly.

I'm amazed people think we might sneak a point from this. We'll play the same team that rolled over and got beat 4-0 last season, set up in the exact same way and it'll happen again.

Good game at Arsenal. There's been two penalties, one wrongly given and Koscielny has been sent off for two yellows and Arsenal have no more fit centre halves. Football is back, I see.

Aye, if I was a Stoke fan, I'd have been cringing. Didn't Adam take them at Blackpool and have a good scoring rate?

Big fat horrible Jonathan Walters ruining my point AGAIN.

Can't wait to be the Newcastle Zeebras.

The man's kept it from being 5-0 and Stoke could still yet get a point.

Also, Begovic is comfortably among the best keepers in the league. He'd be my first choice if/when Krul leaves.

There has been a solid decade of piss-taking happening by the top bollocks at this football club. I'd say getting sick of it is a more logical response than turning up every week and hoping that, this summer, we just MIGHT put it all together and rocket up the league. I'm in the latter btw but that's because I'm thick.

The way they're set-up would be perfect for us this season IMO. Ben Arfa, Cisse, Remy across the front, Cabaye, Anita and Sissoko behind them with Debuchy and Santon pushing up regularly and Colo and Yanga-Mbwia at centre half.

The only habit my lass has got is biting her nails. Nails dirty with the grime of a hard day's manual labour.

I wear Geordie Jumpers tbh. I'm definitely not middle class like but being on here is good practice for when I'm in my 30s and my high-ranking lawyer wife is invited to dinner parties. I know to talk about body fat, where to buy organic meat and the right ale to have with seafood.

If you are expecting big transfers, a top 8 finish and Alan Pardew to steer the ship to land, you need to check yourself into a mental ward tbh.

Just googled them there and you could barely keep your rollies and phone in some of them. And lasses like to say they're not lunatics.

If that table was glass, you could sell it on to the sex industry.

Glad to hear it stays consistent but this could put me right off as I can't stand that kind of dialogue. Though, I did just watch an entire season of New Girl but at least that was funny. I'll see you in 156 episodes time.

At what point does West Wing go to shit?

:lol: Game over, man, game over.

Fucking hell, look at this. Just boarded a plane and using his phone to tell us despite it completely destroying every vital piece of electronic equipment on board, sending everyone to a fiery death.

There's a thread for this, honey x

What WAS your house like before you got on here?

This ignoring of Commando must stop.

Return of the King?