Kitman

They'd have nothing to print if he didn't provide the material. I get the impression his life is like a rolling version of Geordie Shore.

I believe this. Wings. The Frog Chorus. Say no more.

Kevin, don't sell your body to get holiday cash. Even at that price. What would your mam say?

Hope you have fun Kevin. Pacing yourself is the key thing. That way you'll wake up with your money, passport and anus intact.

Likewise mate

Big Mick was obviously relentless

“Next season? He will play a central role in our attacking line. I want to use him as a playmaker, a number 10, just behind one forward. “I am convinced he is able to score between 10 and 15 goals a season.” Pardew in april 2011

He's claiming Ben Arfa wants the number 9 shirt and he's going to be played a second striker I recall pardew saying last season he intended to play Ben arfa as a support striker so that's just recycling old news. The no 9 shirt sounds like shizzle to me

Go on admit it. You're a massive Return of the Jedi fan and the ewoks are your favourite characters

I assumed you were on the secret forum. Good to see you back btw.

Give him a chance.… He'll still be getting split in half by Big Gay Mick that he met last night. . Big Mick may have misunderstood when Kevin said he liked a bit of sausage in his mcmuffin....

Thanks lads. King sized hangover today, woke on the sofa at 3 in the morning cricket on and large unfinished drink nearby. Mrs k not impressed with cut of my gib today.

Have a large whisky Mr P and your symptoms will magically disappear

Not really. I've given it a break but I've always sloped back innit

For some reason I always assumed it was a shortened Geordie Jon. That or a resemblance to fish gujons

if absolutely no one else left then I would be fairly happy. I think I could bear to lose Alan Smith

All the best Kevin. Breith la sona duit. Slainte agus saol chugat.

Thanks folks. Went out, got pissed, spent most of the evening talking to a lovely from Costa Rica. Sometimes the Lord is kind.

Thanks mate. I can see you're a young whippersnapper yerself!

billionaire hes a complete compass arsehole prick cunt faced fat twat lol and breath Fact is he's still a billionare I like your river, but I'm not a fan of your Hawk And your rock's in a terrible state.....

Yeah I agree with that, we're definitely shopping for bargains. I guess that's OK if they turn out to improve the team; the risk is being stuck with an Alan Smith type for 4 years who'll just sit tight and take the money (was it Winston Bogarde for Chelsea a few years back who wouldn't move on even though he was rotting in the reserves?). The worry is they're cheap for a reason.....

Now there's an offer you can't refuse Kevin.....

Sounds like you're nearly ready to run amok before being taken down by a police marksman A definite danger to himself and others iyam "...and finally he turned the gun on himself" Yes. Once he starts bench pressing weights the size of a small country and talking about himself in the third person, he'll be ready, and then THEY'LL PAY. On the upside his muscles will be so pumped he'll be incapable of moving his arms and legs normally and so will be easy to pick off from a helicopter.

Sounds like you're nearly ready to run amok before being taken down by a police marksman

Just occurred to me. Sounds sort of peripheral so suited an OOT