Dazzler

Any excuse to bump this absolute classic:

Kompany announced as Bayern manager. SSN felt the need to point out that Alonso, Nagelsmann and Rangnick all knocked them back and that's the only reason he got the job

Fuck sake. There’s one relegation spot taken which protects Everton again.

I'd take boring and uninspiring over pathetic bullshit, shit, lie idiots any day of the week

Dummett, Ritchie, Hendrick, Kell Watts and Karius all leaving. It's like a new signing.

Depends what his definition of a "couple" is tbf but aye hopefully he gets his head on straight.

I can’t wait for him to be visited by ghosts on Christmas Eve. His redemption arc is going to be fucking epic.

“Ah ca’al theyse jorts mackem jeyns, marra. Coz they’re geordey jeyns that have beyn cut off at tha kneys. D’ya get it, marra? Ah love owt like that, mey.”

Or befriend the token scouser and tell us how much toot he launches up his sniffer at the weekend since Wyki is letting the side down on that front recently.

Plus it’s not like the financial benefit of playing in the conference league would do anything to help their shitty financial performance since Abramovich left so it’s almost a lose / lose for them. Ah well, we’ll take that problem off their hands.

And go berserk when someone asks them if they are from Newcastle despite the accents sounding pretty similar to anyone not from the north east (or at least familiar with both). They’ll go full blown nuts at the notion they are a geordie instead of saying “hahaha na, mate…” which is the appropriate response to something so minor Luckily Newcastle is the famous part of the region so we never have to find out how we’d react to being asked if we’re from sun’lin. However, I think the laugh seems more likely.

His editor wouldn't allow "Man does job" as a headline in case people got confused when reading Ryder's un-spell checked drivel and sued the chron for false advertising.

Aye year 5 is 9-10 so right in the middle. I think before that age it's probably difficult to tell, but by around 8 kids start to pick up on social cues - when to keep your mouth shut to avoid saying anything mental in public that a parent may have to explain on your behalf, or may see you chinned at dinnertime as an example. This latest batch of youngins will be in secondary before they learn, because there will be a bunch of 14+ year olds that won't take kindly to a year 7 letting their mouth go.

I'd say she's bang on tbh. I think when you look at 8-10 year olds now compared to pre-covid they are stunted socially. They all seem to have a maturity a few years below their age bracket because they've missed that formative time at school and instead spent months on youtube getting an inexplicable american accent.

Because most seasons there are three teams promoted that are shitter than them, as well as one or two that survived that are equally as shit as them who have had less luck in terms of decisions or injuries. This season one of the teams coming up is better than them, the other is on equal footing IMO and Ipswich is a bit of a wild card but they seem pretty resilient. Everton are really relying on Wolves to stay in a state of financial ruin (and/or lose their manager to someone better), Forest to be equally as shit as this season (and also in financial ruin due to FFP), and one of Ipswich or Southampton to have a worse start to the season than them. They have it much harder this season than they did last. If they end up on the wrong side of FFP again or they make a shit start then I don't the league table will be as kind to them next season. That said, it's Everton and they could luck themselves to safety just as easy it they could fuck themselves early and often.

"Hamish De Bretton-Gordon" is the toryest of tory names I think I've ever heard. You just know he's shagged a farm animal to get into a secret society. One of my kids is on the SEN register because they missed out on two thirds of the reception year due to covid and they never caught up. Partially because it took the school 18 months to realise there were so many kids falling behind, due to a lack of teachers and teaching assistants because of tory budget cuts. Hamish should jump out of a third story building, ringpiece first, onto a cactus if he thinks a thank you is in order, the posh cunt.

Me upon reading the above:

I haven't banged the drum forever in my defence though I expected them to stay up this season because the quality of the teams promoted were pure shite. Got a bit more hopeful with the points deduction for a spell though. However, the luck has to run out at some point, and Southampton and Leicester have squads good enough to survive IMO, which takes the safety net away at least.

At least for a season to build his confidence/fitness and prove he can still do a job. Everton may well see their luck run out next season with Southampton and Leicester not exactly being pushovers, so joining them may see him getting championship football soon enough

Everton want Kalvin Phillips after that loan move

I wouldn't even say he smashed up the championship, they beat a plucky Ipswich by one point with a significantly better squad. They lost more games than Ipswich too - McKenna seems like the better manager to me based on the very little I've seen of both.

Same kind of people that would high five if some poor refugees drowned in the channel. About three teeth between them, fewer brain cells, never worked a day in their life (because of the immu'gints) but support tory because their bigotry matches. Wipe dopes like these out IMO - That'll sort out the NHS waiting lists.

Cleanest windows in the country, so long as they brushed their teeth after their coco pops.

Potato, what a fat useless cunt. Same thing.