acrossthepond

This is probably excess sentimentality that I'll feel silly about in the cold light of day tomorrow, but I would support Jonas being hired as manager. If we gave him an actual coaching staff to support him (unlike the current coaching staff of a slapheed chancer and Freddie Woodman's dad), I reckon he could be like Garry Monk at Swansea. It's not like our manager buys or sells players anyway so his expertise/lack thereof in that area doesn't matter, and it's very clear that he's up for a challenge, whether that be facing cancer or dragging our squad of mercenaries and total donkeys across the finish line.

Brilliant end to a dogshit season. More of the same to be served up next year. We might've been better served going down to be quite honest.

Get in!

Fuck off you fucking carthorse. Top scorer in Monaco my fucking arse.

Tough watching. We are terrible. I don't think Hull are going to beat Man U though, despite the obviously superior effort they're putting in. Jonas for man of the season tbh, I'm proud to say he plays for us. Not sure there's anyone else among the current gutless bunch of worms I would say the same for.

That is fucking abominable.

How about Marlon Harewood or Zurab Khizanishvili (sp)?

World's best player misses from 2 yards. We're fucked, aren't we? We've had it. Do you reckon Ferreyra can play right back?

Shocking challenge, that was fucking homicidal. What an utter scumbag.

Get Armstrong and Ameobi on because they're from the North East. Fuck me. Who is this turnip co-commentating?

What the fucking hell was Krul playing at there? Why am I still mad about this? That goal summed up everything about this club.

I support those who boycott. Those who choose to continue attending for their kids/dads/friends/because it's part of their life and fuck Ashley if he thinks he'll take it from them, I understand their position as well. But the truth is that he is taking it from us, little by little.

Only 12 on that one. Didn't know Carlton Cole played for Chelsea.

14/15. I got Reyes wrong, thought it was Julio Baptista. Total guess on "Gabriel Paletta", never heard of him.

The closest Carver is going to get at looking at any of those players is managing them on FIFA. He's already admitted his input into transfers is absolute zero and that'll not change if he stays on in the summer, God forbid.

"You're full of shit." "Are you saying you just didn't understand the nuances of the point I was trying to make?" "No."

He was also CabayeAye. Give him a week or two, he'll make a handful of low-key posts and think nobody knows it's him, and then he'll pick another target (maybe Ant, maybe Fish, it was Leazes before - someone he thinks isn't well loved) and it'll be all trolling all the time. Of course, considering how wretched the footballing side of things is right now, we almost need an agitator like him to keep the board from slipping into narcolepsy, so...don't know how I feel.

I had a player on the school team I coach tell me much the same last year and I hoyed him the fuck off the team on the spot. It was offensive enough hearing it from a 14-year-old; having a multi-million pound footballer tell you he can't be arsed is unacceptable and I reckon KK did the right thing. EDIT: But Cole's attitude is just a symptom of the ridiculous player power that's come about because of the ridiculous money in football. When you've assembled a team of 25m+, world-class stars, there's no question of dropping a player on that kind of money to the reserves, because the owner is going to want to see return for his money. It's easier to replace the manager than it is to replace a Torres or Bale.

If it ever gets to a point where nuclear weapons would be called upon, the world is entirely fucked anyway. The UK doesn't need nukes - well, nobody does, but the big boys aren't ever going to give theirs up, so why not live under their nuclear umbrella and stop spunking billions of pounds of taxpayer money on pointless world-destroyers? They don't deter any other nation, nuclear or otherwise, because nobody is going to attack the UK (except maybe Argentina under cloud cuckoo land circumstances and we don't need nukes to beat them), and they don't deter terrorists, for obvious reasons. So really they do nothing except make certain paranoid loonies sleep a little better at night and cost an inordinate amount of money.

You forgot CabayeAye, Desmondtutu, a few other iterations along the way.

To be fair, West Ham are taking the piss with those ticket prices.

Do you reckon you could wear a burka while doing it?

Sky Sports on the wind-up with an "interactive feature" about Carroll's seemingly endless injuries: http://www1.skysports.com/football/news/15130/9713119/andy-carrolls-injuries-at-west-ham-interactive-guide

Brilliant. Good on him, Savage is a complete wanker. I liked Scholes getting stuck into that ridiculous dossier as well, ex Man U or not. Shades of Benitez's "facts" rant there. Van Gaal already losing his bottle?

Are we sure that was Pardew in the opposition dugout, not in ours? Two terrible defensive subs that killed off any chance we had of getting back into the game. Playing for a point against Pardew and Crystal fucking Palace? Do one you charlatan.