Jay Jay Sea

good enuff for Dot Cotton.......good enuff for me.....and she smokes proppa tabs.....people smoke right.........fact. let them enjoy it.....they know the beef.....

Where you been all my life chap? The images you have conjured up have brought on a kind of semi-on, almost pre-cum like state from the depths of the old nether region. Your use of language turns me on big time........I think, with me carrying a hammer and you tied to a chair, wearing nothing but a gimp mask and my mams knickers with a ciggy in your gob (or arse even for that matter), we'd make a lovely couple.

I'm sorry, I just don't believe that. A claw hammer would be used to 'pull' their loved one's teeth out, not batter them out. Believe it man, believe it. Who want's to use a claw-hammer in the 'conventional' way? Where's the thrill? In the same way, why get ya chick to smoke through her mouth when you (regardless of whether she wants to or not) can use her fanny? It's the same with a chicks back-eye. What's the point of not getting amongst it and it just being used for having a plop? I'm sick of hearing that the back-eye is solely for plopping, things coming out. Make use, it's for insertion, cocks and tools, butt-end of a claw-hammer maybe or tab butt for that matter. A lit tab butt. Cool. That is cool. A back-eye with a lit tab butt hanging from it. Burns the nicotine fanny concept off. Arse smoking is where it's at.

Smoking might not be 'cool' as that it can reduce you're life expectancy but those that do smoke are cool because they look cool. I'd rather have a cool pose, tab in hand, birds sucking on my cock, than not smoke and wank myself off all day. The best smokers are the chicks that will light a fag (cigar even better) and smoke it with their fanny. A fanny full of nicotine being licked out is heaven. In fact, a fanny full of nicotine per day keeps the non-smoker away. I've always got my women to smoke using there fanny. They've had no other choice really, once I've battered their teeth out with a claw-hammer and their jaw is wired-up. Rather fanny smoke that have to take some random bloke up the back eye who's smoking on a super skinny rolly like they do in prison, strolling round the yard at break-time. So yeah, smoking is cool. I smoke. Marlboro.

Good riddance. He is massively to blame for his own demise. I'm of the opinion that he never had any real service but then his attitude, for a long time, has been 'put the ball less than 10cm from my feet and I'll score, but, to be in a scoring position, I must be taken by helicopter from the half-way line to get into the box but remember this also, do not deliver me the ball until that nag has ran in the 3.30 at Chepstow as I can't concentrate on the game and if the horse wins wins, i'll think about having a shot at goal otherwise give the ball to someone else. Make sure i'm paid £105,000 per week for doing nothing except pleasing myself and fck you lot over, the fans, who pay my wages, I'm Micky Owen, too good for NUFC, Just be grateful I pulled on your black n' white shirt and delivered fck all in the proceed. Right, where's me copta, I got horse to feed and Dettori is coming over to ride out a couple of nags that I have purchased at the sales, courtesy of NUFC. Fckn hate the twat.

Just received this off my cousin, a fckin family memeber, who is a Mackem season ticket holding scum loving c*nt. I think there are times when murdering a family member is acceptable. Anyway, he's a little c*nt and It would be easier to get someone else to give him a little 'going over'. Got to the 2nd sentence and knew what was coming. Hull have been charged with fielding an unregistered player at the end of January '09. When they signed Kamil Zayatte from Young Boys for £2.5M on 23 January this year, there had been some irregularities with the transfer and he was not formerly registered when Hull drew 2-2 with West Brom. West Brom have been awarded 3 points for that game instead of 1 but it has made no difference to them, they are still relegated. However Hull have been stripped of their point, which puts them on the same points as Newcastle but with a poorer goal difference. Newcastle have complained immediately and if their claim is upheld, Hull will be relegated retrospectively and the Toon will stay up! Carlsberg don't do emails for delusional Geordies, but if they did, they would probably be the best e-mails in the world!

This. My little girl is 5 and it's just unthinkable, unimaginable, that they are no longer going to be around. If only, in such tragic circumstances, we were able to exchange places, I'm sure everyone would, at the drop of a hat. I watched the 'Tyson' film at the weekend and I'm there was a small bit of footage for a minute or so with Tyson and one of his little girls. The interaction between them was real father/daughter stuff (hope that makes sense) and she was a diamond. RIP.

Jonas - fucking bottler. Hanging himself on the eve of our biggest game for years. Should've done it months ago. RIP

I'm gonna watch this game, snooker ball in a sock, The Ivy House in Sunderland, speeding off my nut, in the corner of the bar and then gonna go fucking ape shit, win, lose, draw, relegated or staying up. Car waiting outside pub 5.45 p.m. (well up the lane). Some 10 miles from home. Fuckinn yeeha chaps. Yee fuckin hippidy hop ha. When I was a bairn, I could lob onions, picked straight from me fathaz sorry excuse for an 'allotment', for what seem like miles and found them a sturdy weapon. No difference to snooker/pool ball in a sock. May Satan be with me that day (and my fellow bretheren).

I remember being in the 'corner' (at the front) when Gates stuck the ball in the net.....i was about 14.....and some fans ran onto the pitch (NUFC that is) and ran, i guess, as far as the half way line and then retreated, saving themselves for the kick off that ensued outside of the ground at full-time, in town and down at the Central Station. Mid-week if I recall which I supposed softened the blow from those wanting to do an all day sesh but couldn't because of work. Still didn't stop some mind.

You're right chap but I think that there's going to be a few thousand more packed into the bars and not St James' and it'll go off.....then we'll have the old Chelsea brigade passing through the Central Station no doubt....and never the twain shall meet........and then there will be the ones that turn on their own.......and to make matters worse.......it a bank holiday weekend......dark weekend ahead all round.....

It's been a while since the toon witnessed any major kicks offs but if we go down on Sunday, can you see it happening and if so, to what extent? Personally I see it happening, bars in Newcastle kicking off, shop windows going out, some skirmishes here and there but to what extent I'm not sure. Likely to be the 'youngsters' with some older heads scattered about for good measure. I think the town might not be the best place to be drinking (or shopping for that matter) if we are relegated. I could be wrong here but I don't recall too much k-o in the past with teams being relegated but I just can't help but feel 'we' are a different beast all together......and the 'high' for some will be to go out in a massive blaze of shit.

Working on obtaining the chap's IP address right now Chez. If I get a hold of it then it will be the equivalent of a human finding a winning lottery ticket, the exception being that I'd get more excitement cutting this little fcker up than have £10 million winning ticket. Pliers and teeth Chey, pliers and teeth. You feeling it Danny Boy? You will be one day soon, you with no teeth, just a pretty mouth, semi-open, and your gums carressing my bellend.

I have been successful. I was parking up at Tynemouth last summer (evening) on the front to walk the dof along the beach. Was heading back to the car and spotted, what at first I thought was an intruder, a parking attendant fixing a ticket to my window. I told him that I had seen a group of kids assault an old man so I ha jumped out of the car to help and the kids ran off. Parking attendant said 'sorry mate, that's the way she goes'. I said to him, 'look mate, mate, mate you don't understand, I've just tried to help this old fella to his feet'. Then he says 'yeah ok man, just doing my job'...I was livid. I put the dog into the back of the car and as he was fixing this ticket, I opened the passenger door and opened the glove compartment. 'No hard feelings matee' said the attendent. He didn't finish he sentence. I clobbered the fcker with a crow-bar and bundled him into the car withhim almost fully unconcious. The dog was tearing away at him and I sped of toward Blyth, turning off for Plessy Woods. I knifed the fcker to death nad remember repeating over and over 'fcking tixcket you leech, parasite, blood-suckign hell fiend...I'll fcking ticket you', whilst knifing him. I tied the dog to a tree and got stuck up the old attendant whilst stuffing an old handkerchief into his mouth. Shot the old muck, cut him up, fed him to the dog and buried some left-overs in the woods. What a night that was.

FREE PEACE are the quality. They are the best band I have heard since.....well I can't even compare.........Cream, Hendrix Experience , Led Zep (ish), The Stones.......there's a little bit of all of the afforementioned in FREE PEACE. The very best and I mean that. I will resurrect this thread when they make it. Get amongst it. They are supporting OASIS at their up and coming June gigs. They are 4th on the bill. Check them out.

I must deliver the message. Parkster, would it be unreasonable for me to 'suggest' that The Eagles were a better group i.e. songs alone, than The Stones Roses? I'm 100% of the view that the Eagles kill the Roses right now. I know they are two entirely different groups.......and I am not joking.

Killing is the discouters way to heaven. 'I found out a long time ago.....what a woman can do to your soul'. Learn from that boy Parky...... The Eagles.....they know.... Sweet. Yeah? Your back on side you sexy beast. I love you (and you know it)....no fcking messing....... It's one of those givens in life, like when you talk to someone (after 11 pints) who cuts trees for a living in a big dark forest and you have so much respect for him you want to go out first light and buy a jacket like his. But if you have real bollocks, you will get up 'first light', skin the cunt and wear his skin, not settle for second best like wear his 'jacket'. Keep up man chap. You are good but have slipped lately.....not sure you have learned from the master.

I'm in the same camp. I am much more worried by the thought of losing Shearer than going down. I'm assuming that losing Shearer means the return of JFK and the extinguishing of any hope for the next few years The one good thing that could possibly come out of that would be the last few lunatics there are in this world who believe that Ashley has the best interests of the club at heart must finally realise the truth. There this fuckin speccy four-eyed season ticket holding cunt who, I engaged in converstaion with about the toon qt work earlier this week. Basically the lads a diamond, late 40s, good chap. Told him I thought Ashley was a fuckin dick (using recent events as evidence) and he told me I was a 'fcukin mug', that 'Ashley will get it right'. Fuckin cock-eyed prick made me want to fuckin chin him there and then........he's pro-Ashley.....and for that...you gotta have a screw loose....I mean, what the fuck do people who think Ashley is good for NUFC, see that we do not? I must be missing something (and I am a fckin brainy bastard, make no mistake about that)? JJ you've clearly gone gay. The golden rule is hit first (after the mandatory 7 pints) think laters. Isn't it? You gay fuck!! Listen you fuckin queer self-adopted German queer fuck, you know the score. You know I'm right. Your typing shit on this forum and I bet your wife is geting fucked by that Serb/Croat or whatever he is right now. My wife? At least I know she's cleaning mopping her own blood up from the floor where she tok a clean left from me. Yeah, the fucker dared to ask me this, 'you came home at 9.25 a.m. this morning, you watch the boxing I take it? Who won and how was the fight won?' My response? This....'Manny Paqu........' then I fuckin threw a solid punch into her jaw. Why would I want mince and dumplings for tea when the weather has been semi-warm? As the mist clears from the lake, you are often the only grain of sanity in Chrisendom. Fuck....I never, ever respond with something so lame as this but.............

Seems to me, taht is life replicated itself in Parky's posts, then naturally, the authorities would take the appropriate action to 'decommision' him. Expel him from his adopted country. Parky, he is but an imigrant. Bit of water on his leg? Fuckin he should have be executed by now......cat with 9 lives if you ask me.

Killing is the discouters way to heaven. 'I found out a long time ago.....what a woman can do to your soul'. Learn from that boy Parky...... The Eagles.....they know.... Sweet. Yeah? Your back on side you sexy beast. I love you (and you know it)....no fcking messing.......

Killing is the discouters way to heaven. 'I found out a long time ago.....what a woman can do to your soul'. Learn from that boy Parky...... The Eagles.....they know....

I'm in the same camp. I am much more worried by the thought of losing Shearer than going down. I'm assuming that losing Shearer means the return of JFK and the extinguishing of any hope for the next few years The one good thing that could possibly come out of that would be the last few lunatics there are in this world who believe that Ashley has the best interests of the club at heart must finally realise the truth. There this fuckin speccy four-eyed season ticket holding cunt who, I engaged in converstaion with about the toon qt work earlier this week. Basically the lads a diamond, late 40s, good chap. Told him I thought Ashley was a fuckin dick (using recent events as evidence) and he told me I was a 'fcukin mug', that 'Ashley will get it right'. Fuckin cock-eyed prick made me want to fuckin chin him there and then........he's pro-Ashley.....and for that...you gotta have a screw loose....I mean, what the fuck do people who think Ashley is good for NUFC, see that we do not? I must be missing something (and I am a fckin brainy bastard, make no mistake about that)? JJ you've clearly gone gay. The golden rule is hit first (after the mandatory 7 pints) think laters. Isn't it? You gay fuck!! Listen you fuckin queer self-adopted German queer fuck, you know the score. You know I'm right. Your typing shit on this forum and I bet your wife is geting fucked by that Serb/Croat or whatever he is right now. My wife? At least I know she's cleaning mopping her own blood up from the floor where she tok a clean left from me. Yeah, the fucker dared to ask me this, 'you came home at 9.25 a.m. this morning, you watch the boxing I take it? Who won and how was the fight won?' My response? This....'Manny Paqu........' then I fuckin threw a solid punch into her jaw. Why would I want mince and dumplings for tea when the weather has been semi-warm?

Fckin PM me, seen a million shit threads/scenarios like this on these here NUFC fora and it ends up with the same shit repeaeed by me. If you don't want to kill the slag, i will. For free. Just PM me with address details. Don't want to be incriminated? Get some other human to PM me. Wrong section by the way.

I'm in the same camp. I am much more worried by the thought of losing Shearer than going down. I'm assuming that losing Shearer means the return of JFK and the extinguishing of any hope for the next few years The one good thing that could possibly come out of that would be the last few lunatics there are in this world who believe that Ashley has the best interests of the club at heart must finally realise the truth. There this fuckin speccy four-eyed season ticket holding cunt who, I engaged in converstaion with about the toon qt work earlier this week. Basically the lads a diamond, late 40s, good chap. Told him I thought Ashley was a fuckin dick (using recent events as evidence) and he told me I was a 'fcukin mug', that 'Ashley will get it right'. Fuckin cock-eyed prick made me want to fuckin chin him there and then........he's pro-Ashley.....and for that...you gotta have a screw loose....I mean, what the fuck do people who think Ashley is good for NUFC, see that we do not? I must be missing something (and I am a fckin brainy bastard, make no mistake about that)?