The Fish

Also when you look at their start They've had an easier start than most (Worrying news for West Ham and Villa though).

It'll likely be Ekitike that throws the first wobbler to be honest. He's played well and yet the first 'massive' game he's unceremoniously dropped to the bench for a bloke who's not trained properly or played a minute of competitive club football? And I'm here for all of it.

We've been lucky so far, the "away" games are at the same place as our "home" games

For what it's worth and I accept it's a small sample size and all that but... They're conceding a load of chances and not creating many. They're scoring significantly more goals than you'd expect from those few chances and ... They're conceding significantly fewer goals than you'd expect given the chances they give up. Again, it's a small sample size but I wouldn't be getting too excited if I were them.

If we win it'll be corruption, luck and Barcelona not being as good as they once were. If we lose it'll be because we're shite, we've overpaid for every player and Howe is a fraud. You can set your clocks by it.

Franchise clubs.

To be fair, these are rumours passed around by bored blokes in the Cheshire rain, so some/all of it might be bollocks

He was unreal even at 6. Not just the touch and technique, but even just the understanding of space. Like, he might never make it, but it was clear he was really talented and focused on the game. But some of the stories are pretty heartbreaking, like how on a play date he didn't know how to play with Lego or action figures and just wanted to play football all day, how his parents got him a private coach and all that. He used to have little strops when the other kids didn't pass to him, or if they miscontrolled his pass.

Oh fuck, are you going? Lumping my savings on a home loss then. You fucking Jonah

He has two chants, he needs a good one.

A new deal and a release clause is all well and good, what I think would really help is if we got him a better chant.

There’s a kid at my lads' team who’s now on the books for both Liverpool and Man City’s youth teams, but the word going around among the dads is that Chelsea have tapped him up—offering "a job" for the mam, a house, covering private school fees and all that good shit.

so, ~150 miles from wallsend?

There've been a couple of lads on my son's team who've been snapped up by the big academies. The difference between them and the other 6 or 7yr olds is wild.

The revisionism is ramping up. Spending £130m on a whiny cunt and making out like it's the Deal of the Century.

Phenomenal player. After the year of living dangerously, he's really become the first name on the team sheet for me.

I don't like that bet

"Snookered at Hotch Porch" is the name of a difficult second album for an extremist folk band.

And other clubs with the headroom to conduct business like Chelsea will just factor it into the cost of doing business.

Honestly, what's the fucking point?

You don't fancy a challenging wank?

And I'm the one least likely to be rendered by a police sketch artist