David Kelly

I haven't noticed anyone ask this and I'm more than a bit surprised at it so I guess I'll have to be the one who asks. Is he black or white?

Crap at his job by all accounts

You can expect a load of this propaganda coming out over the next few weeks.

Don't know why I'm laughing when it's true!

Was waiting for this like. No doubt we'll be seeing a load of shite over the next couple of weeks about how Fergusson's going to be the man to save us a load of money on buying a new left back. Which will be good because I hear the board room needs a new carpet!

None of the above play right midfield, one of them has been out for about 18 months and no one (including Ryder I have no doubt) has really seen the two frogs play. Even if you discount the fact that Barton was player of the year last season this beggars belief! What a wanker this guy is.

It will never happen. As I said elsewhere there's no point listening to Pardew at all because he's either in on everything with them or a moron who believes the same shite that we can see is utter bollox. You'll get nothing more from him that you'll get from Ryder tbf. qft. I go with the idea that he's just happy to have a top flight job again and he clearly has no say in who stays at the club. Aye, plus it's win-win really. If he does a decent job it's "a remarkable job under the circumstances" but if he doesn't he'll be able to argue he didn't have control of transfers, had no money etc. Surely it's just the money for him. If its as it appears and he has no say in things then whether he's managing in the top flight or conference makes no difference to him. He can't be getting any satisfaction from the job.

It will never happen. As I said elsewhere there's no point listening to Pardew at all because he's either in on everything with them or a moron who believes the same shite that we can see is utter bollox. You'll get nothing more from him that you'll get from Ryder tbf.

Has anyone read Ryders piece in the Chronicle today? The level of properganda is actually hillarious. Best bit for me is that part of the reason to get rid of Barton his the unfavourable impression hes giving the new players who have signed and the ones that will be signing and 'Could be in place soon'. It's ok lads we've lost yet another of our best players but rest assured, the next free transfer will be arriving any day!

More likely a combination of all the above tbh. I was about to add that myself but you beat me to it

Clearly it's not worth listening to a single word that Pardew says! He falls into one of three catagories; A. He's just lied to constantly by the pricks above him. B. He just lies to us. C. He's got less brains than your average makem! Whichever one it is the man is of no use to us.

We really have got fucking up down to a fine art now haven't we. Why any of us are surprised by this any more is completely beyond me. The one result we know in all of this is that we now don't have a right midfielder so that's another signing we need but won't get.

It's amazing how just over a month ago this looked like quite a promising pre season (well compared to what we've come to expect from this lot) and now its looking more like it's going to be copy of three years ago!

Don't think they're that hard to accomodate tbh. You've got Tiote, Cabaye, Barton and Gosling who would be genuine contenders for then centre then Jonas, Barton, Marveaux and Ben Arfa for the wings. That's only seven players for four positions and then there's a fair chance of either Ben Arfa being pushed forward or us playing with a five man midfield. I would say that's a pretty reasonable balance especially when Gosling can apparantly fill in at right back and Ben Arfa can be a forward.

To be fair plenty of people have been calling him shit right the way through. And they're right

What I can't understand is all of the talk about the money going on wages. Surely you pay wages out of your trading income not out of selling your assets. Call me thick but in any sort of business I've encountered that's how things work. And if the money we take in from ticket sales, merchandising, sponsorship, prize money and tv deals, isn't enough to pay our wages there is something seriously wrong. I can buy agent fees and even signing on fees as having to come out of transfer income but I can't buy wages. So therefore we can't have spent more than £10m so far (and there's the money for Nolan to add back) there should still be £25m left if the whole lot is to be spent on transfers. But of course we know that's bollocks anyway don't we.

He's crap for me like. He has absolutely no anticipation at all, he reacts instead and although he is reasonably pacey, he's not fast enough for that. The only good game he had for us was West Ham and they were so fucking hopeless it was unreal. I was amazed he scored against Birmingham after he was so inept against Blackburn the week before. He (just like Shola, Lovenkrands and Ranger) is a championship player which is why he isn't good enough for us.

Transformers 3. I don't usually go mad for this stuff but I saw this on imax and thought it was brilliant. Of course the lass was shite (and not a patch on Fox for me) and you could probably blow a million and one holes in it but it was just great fun. X Men First Class. Was more than a bit sceptical of this after Wolverine was so poor but I thoroughly enjoyed it. Don't know if it's because unlike a lot of comic book adaptations, I didn't know too much about the origins on the x Men (don't even know if this is the true origins), but I enjoyed it much more than most series openers. I would put it up there with Batman Begins. It may not have quite the qulity of Nolans first but it was certainly as enjoyable.

Don't want him wasting money on Routledge when Guthrie is waiting for him!

Ngog has always looked shite and I've heard Gibson gets a shit load of stick from the manure fans. I wouldn't be at all surprised to see both Brown and O'Shea be shown up as very average players once they're out of a quality team.

I think our improvement in the championship with him in the midle had more to do with us getting him off the wing and Routledge there. Admittedly he did much better at that time though.

Please let this be true. The kid has been shite since day one. He's slow, has no engine or heart and whist he can pick out the odd decent ball, most of his passing is shite. I cringe whenever I see his name on the teamsheet. He's a championship player and only a decent one at that. He may be cheap but there's a reason for that!

Don't think much of him tbh. Looks like his brother but not as good. Maybe he could become useful in time but i think he'd be more frustrating

When Barton and Nolan go we'll be left with Tiote, Cabaye, Guthrie (an average Championship player), Smith (assuming we can't get shot of him) and kids. That's not much in the way of options at all. Not saying that Reo Coker is much more of an option like.

Glad I never got round to putting that bet on Clarkie going there now!