David Kelly

The Shape Of Water. What's not to love about a romance between a mute woman and a fish man.

I don't think 10 Cloverfield Lane was written that way either but I thought that worked really well. Apart from the fact that name of the film gave away whether Goodman's character was just a loon or whether his claims were true. I really liked it either way mind. I went to see The 15:17 to Paris last night which is the new film from Clint Eastwood about the attempted terrorist attack on a train headed for Paris which was foiled by (mainly) three American tourists, two of which were off duty military. The three real guys play themselves in the film rather than using actors. Unfortunately this is one of a couple of reasons why the film doesn't work. Instead of it coming across more real, it just shows them up as really bad actors. The other main reason is that the whole attempted attack lasts about ten minutes so for the rest of the film you have a pretty uninteresting story of the three guys meeting in childhood and them growing up and then taking a trip round Europe which eventually leads to them being on the train from Amsterdam to Paris. The guys (as well as one or two other who get short changed) are certainly heroes that prevented many deaths but unfortunately there's not enough in their story to last 94 minutes.

My dad was telling me at the match on Sunday that he'd read their match report in the Sunday Sun and they still had 2 or 3 players who they'd scored as a 2 in the marks and most of the rest of them were 4's and 5's. Overriding impression was that this wasn't anywhere near enough to paper over the cracks. Of course regardless of how they managed it, they did manage it and it is the type of thing that they could possibly draw on to lift things and take them forward. Or more likely they'll continue to be unable to defend and get twatted off Brentford on Saturday.

Difficult for the players we have to keep playing to that level. Consistency is what you get from top players not the type that we have.

Reserves played again. We’re clearly focusing on ODI’s ahead of the World Cup. Strange that you’re not really. But you’ve got a much better set up for T20’s. Looks like having Warner captening instead of Smith works well (well apart from his actual batting but he’s been pretty poor all summer). We were pretty shit though it has to be said.

Brilliant performance yesterday. Shelvey’s most complete performance since he’s been here. Diame alongside him continued his good form, Lejeune and Lacelles were excellent and Dummett is actually starting to win me over (defensively at least). Delighted for Dub’s start. It can be difficult for keepers to move to a new team but to have a debut like that is an absolute dream. I’m hanging today but well worth it.

I keep saying this to people. I don't know what they think we can do with the players available.

Slimani still not fully fit apparently. He's going to be checked on tomorrow. Can't see him starting.

I can't get away with Kendrick Lamar or any of that style of hiphop. It's much like R&B for my tastes. My tickets for Belle and Sebastian next month at the Sage have just arrived. And I've got Bjork, Beck and Father John Misty (among others) in London in May to forward to. Even in my 40's I doubt I'll be the oldest there for any of those fortunately.

Maxwell should have been given out today, even your commentators said so. Despite playing poorly and resting half our team we would have beaten you had that been given. Maxwell was pretty much your only good player today. Warner and Lynn went for nothing and the much vaunted Stanlake got smashed about the park. Fair play to Maxwell though, he was excellent against our reserves.

If the pay's right I'm sure he/she(?) will be. I mean, money talks.

As long as you continue to get the benefit of dodgy video umpiring decisions I wouldn't worry.

I quite liked it but I'd agree with that. Very derivative but entertaining. Not wanting to give any spoilers but I'm not really sure what they're doing trying to make a series of these films.

Can we go back to ODI's please.

Haha I've just reread the article I read on it when we discussed this a while back. He was charged with lewd behaviour on a child of under 14. I assumed that meant that was the age of consent at the time in California. Happily it looks like I was wrong on that score. Apparently it was 14 in Hawaii until 2001 which is more than a little alarming.

I said one of my favourite's not Fish's.

Hasn't she actually gone further than saying she doesn't want proceedings to continue? I'm sure I read somewhere that she basically defended him and said it's done her no harm in her life at all. Of course there's many reasons why she might have this view be it that she's been paid off or some form Stockholm Syndrome. Also wasn't the age of consent about 14 then as well? I'm in no way saying any of the above (if I haven't just imagined it) let's him off the hook for being a horrible predatory twat. Albeit one who made one of my favourite films of all time.

No end product from him. He looks good a lot of the time but usually achieves nothing. Can't see a big club ever going for him again unless he can change that.

I think the best chance we have against one of the top teams is usually Chelsea as they don't like coming up here. But as it's last game of the season I wouldn't be banking on that this year. I don't really fancy us against anyone these days but hopefully Slimani will come in and change that.

It wasn't a bad result but it's another game that's gone by without a win against one of the other teams that are down around us. I don't see us picking up points against the top teams like Swansea have managed to do recently and we have a fair few of those games left. Personally I think we will go down unless Slimani does something Cisse like.

Got a poor review in empire so I was about to write it off. I’ll give it a go now.

I’ll try that with the cricket through the week.

The last two episodes of black mirror were superb. For some reason the one with Maxine Peak has the worst rating of any on IMDb. I thought it was excellent. Especially since there was no explanation for what was happening. The last one had obvious similarities to the White Christmas episode in both tone and design and was also brilliant. I’d put black mirror up there with inside number 9 as by far the most interesting thing on tv.

He does look slightly backwards though.

It’s not realistic to say we should beat anyone. We could beat them but Luton are the only team we should have beat this season with this squad.