ChezGiven

Nevermind my geordie accent, my french accent is fucking atrocious.

Are you talking about getting sucked off under the table?

That hotel looks lush, is it the one near central station? Best time to go is June 21st or thereabouts for mid-summer. Everyone heads out to the islands (the archipelago) and gets twatted on schnaps for 2 days. Goes down nicely with the raw fish. (thats not a euphemism btw).

Switzerland.

Dubliner Southside on Södermalm (?) is a good Irish bar with all the football. Good starting place for a night out and there are loads of clubs in the city full of fit birds totally up their own arses. Heaven tbh. I can ask my bro for some proper advice if you decide to go. Benni from ABBA has a good hotel just along the road from there on that island (stockholm is basically 5 islands), the best feature of which is 'the honesty bar' . I wouldnt bother going in the winter, its fucking freezing and no one goes out. They all get SAD too as they only have 20 minutes of sunlight a day. The summer however.....

You should always wipe backwards, women in particular to reduce urinary tract infections. Or if you're manc-mag, just scrunch the bog paper up into a big ball, shove it in your crack and hope the shit sticks before strolling off laden with winnets. Does everyone look at every wipe? Or just towards the end?

Thats the whole point, standing up is a real brown eye closer tbh.

Would you shit standing up?

I used to stand untill i discovered the joys of sitting. I basically go to the bog for a bit of a rest and a read so standing up tends to ruin the experience. I also find that sitting down keeps the cheeks slightly splayed allowing extra purchase on my ring to minimise winnets etc. I sit down, i'm not proud of it but i am proud of my spanking clean ring piece. There, i said it.

Lippi > Capello

Classy.

Posh birds mancy, they're all twisted. It was Cristal anyway pleb.

Sole reason we used to walk past Central High Girls School on the way home! Although we had to drop Meenzer off first as he cramped our style and was simply far too gay back in the day! I bet he was like the kid who is the stylist in School of Rock back then. Back on topic though, i used to think a fizzy arse was what you got after 10 pints and too many peanuts until i met that posh lass.

Posh fanny is all licking caviar off your bell and spitting champers up your hoop. Nowt better.

Yeah what about it!? I was his Sixer in the cubs, took a right diva fit when I didn't promote him to Seconder!! You think you spurning him then meant he turned to the brown side?

SMO and Meenzer used to play a game called 'willies' in junior school.

The best kind.

I wouldnt wear them to work personally but you could give them a go. Ok, so they are fine when you wear them around the house though? Give them a whirl!

I wouldnt wear them to work personally but you could give them a go.

Lasses just pooping out of bushes throwing the lips on you all the time, I bet. 2 girls 1 cup style? A bit much on a first date iyam.

edit - btw, what the fuck kind of name is scatman john for a kiddy's pop star? what's next? rim job rick? Scat has more than one meaning. And he was a serious artist The fucking charvas next door to me played 'I'm a Scatman' for about 3 weeks non-stop in my 2nd year at University. And what the fuck did you think wasn't serious about my post like? Everything. Ski-Ba-Bop-Ba-Dop-Bop-Up-Yours! I'd go with Stevie Wonder or Al Green for the voice and with the OP for the performer.

Lankybellwipe? The mans a loon. He's a legend. Semi-regularly published in Viz. Still finding his feet on NO, a bit leftfield for most people on there. Nutter definitely.

Lankybellwipe? The mans a loon.

Freudian slip? You've got men on the brain.

Cool name, obviously a man of distinction.