Bombadil

Must be the luckiest bloke involved in professional football. Cannot be arsed to come onto the pitch pre-match and watch the warm ups. I remember the game at Villa this season and as all the staff/subs are walking to the dugouts, he's on his mobile probably putting the bets on. Can you imagine him wired up with a headset? "Er one four for a copy Big Sam?"

For the record, I think Viduka would be a decent signing now that we've got a good manager. I was just indulging in some old-school jokes about Viduka. Dan, your turn now!

He's a good player. Excellent actually. Can play anywhere amongst the back four. Better than Anton Ferdinand. Actually to compare the two is an insult to Neill. Glad the Hammers didn't get relegated and Roeder is gone. Means we won't get shit like Ferdinand to the club, well we can only hope. You wouldn't be Australian by any chance? Why because he can see anton ferdinand is shite? Even a blind one legged hockey playing canadian can see that No, because Neill is "excellent" and Viduka is "not fat". Next he'll be telling us that Emerton is world-class!

I've taken this week off from work to prepare for a few university exams, and I simply cannot bring myself to do anything. Honestly, I wish I was at work. At least it's a bank holiday on Thursday.

He's a good player. Excellent actually. Can play anywhere amongst the back four. Better than Anton Ferdinand. Actually to compare the two is an insult to Neill. Glad the Hammers didn't get relegated and Roeder is gone. Means we won't get shit like Ferdinand to the club, well we can only hope. You wouldn't be Australian by any chance?

Viduka is so fat that when he steps on the weighing device, it says 'to be continued'.

This is exactly the sort of stuff we've been missing for years. Really positive to hear the new bloke talking about this sort of thing as a priority. Yes. Hopefully Allardyce can get the people he needs.

Agree.

I hope West Ham go down so we can get one or two of their players on the cheap.

7 goals in 37 starts in the league. And he is how old?

Speed has scored for Bolton, how many has he scored this season now? Amazing.

Pattison is completely and utterly out of his depth at this level.

Fact. Indisputable FACT.

True, I misread the article. £15m up front plus cash from player sales. That sounds far more realistic. I wouldn't mind if we sold Dyer as long as we can still get good money for him. £80,000 a week, FFS.

Assuming for a second it's true, that would be £12m plus compensation for Allardyce, £40m for new players and a fair bit of money for Allardyce's new backroom staff - where would all the money come from?

Saw him on Wednesday in Shepherd's Bush Empire, what did you think? I thought it was all right, nothing too special though.

By Alan Oliver, The Evening Chronicle Sam Allardyce will sign a four-year contract worth £12m when he becomes Newcastle United manager next week. United are facing a compensation claim from Bolton Wanderers regarding their former manager but Freddy Shepherd obviously believes that Allardyce is going to be worth every penny. Shepherd is clearly confident that he has got his man after a leading national newspaper was tipped off over their meeting in Claridge's in London. United could hardly have chosen a more public place to let the world know that they were meeting Allardyce, and it is in stark contrast to when they met Kenny Dalglish in a quiet hotel off the M6 when the Scot became their manager in 1997. The Chronicle reported on Thursday that Allardyce would be unveiled by United in the middle of next week and this will be the case. All that is needed is for Allardyce to mull over what happened in his talks with Shepherd yesterday and for his contract to be rubber-stamped at a board meeting at St James' Park on Monday. And the fact that United have offered Allardyce a four-year contract rules out any chance of Alan Shearer returning to the club as manager in the immediate future. However, what the immediate future holds for United is to see who Allardyce brings in as his backroom staff, although I expect him to offer Lee Clark the chance to stay as Reserve team coach. Big Sam has always had a large backroom staff at the Reebok Stadium but with the question of compensation still to be sorted out, the last thing United will want to do is upset Bolton chairman Phil Gartside. I have spoken to former United men Gary Speed and Neil McDonald this week, both of whom worked with Allardyce at the Reebok, and it would not surprise me if either - or indeed both - returned to St James' Park. One of the things that has impressed Shepherd about the way Allardyce has worked at the Reebok Stadium is the lack of injuries Bolton have had in recent seasons. Indeed, while United players have lost over 400 hours of playing time this season because of injuries, Bolton only lost 70. And this was because Allardyce (right) and his backroom staff came up with a formula to prevent injuries before they happen. United fans will wait to see how much Allardyce is given to spend but it will not be a lot as the club has never really recovered financially from spending almost £30m in one week on Michael Owen and Albert Luque. But Newcastle have not been letting the grass grow under their feet on the question of new players, and the Chronicle revealed yesterday that a delegation from St James' Park had a meeting with top European agent Mike Morris in Monte Carlo on Thursday night. Shepherd and Allardyce plus their back-up men met in Claridge's for three hours and it's a fair bet a lot of time was spent discussing Michael Owen's situation at St. James' Park. And I have to say there is a fair chance that Owen will not be a United player come the start of the season.

Get well soon, Greg.

I really loved the Get Ready album tbh.

Honestly, I thought you'd made that up! I had to check the official site to see if it was genuine!

DJ Bobo is representing Switzerland, isn't he? Jesus wept.

I've just come back from a few days away from the computer and I've read Oliver's and Shepherd's ramblings and honestly, it makes you physically cringe. What a pair of utter, utter tits.

Allardyce will be good for us. I'm really optimistic.

Ditto.