Ayatollah Hermione 12767 Posted May 26, 2018 Share Posted May 26, 2018 The girth to length ratio has to be spot on. Or cock on, if you will. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38763 Posted May 26, 2018 Share Posted May 26, 2018 2 hours ago, Gemmill said: How would you describe a perfect cock and balls? What do you look for? Spoiler Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tdansmith 2107 Posted May 28, 2018 Share Posted May 28, 2018 On 25/05/2018 at 21:00, Monkeys Fist said: Somewhat stunned. My 7yr-old lad has just produced a shite that would put an elephant to shame. The fucking thing was monumental, I’d estimate if you stood the fucker on its end it’d be a third his height. He seems totally unfazed, but I’m poised and ready to run him down to A&E in case his hoop has a delayed reaction later and attempts to consume the nearest star. Proud as punch, if I’m honest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 26346 Posted May 28, 2018 Share Posted May 28, 2018 Creep. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted May 28, 2018 Share Posted May 28, 2018 Scat nonce Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawb 3659 Posted May 28, 2018 Share Posted May 28, 2018 Chemo starts in the morning. More worried about how bored I’m going to be in the hospital for 3 full days and overnight that owt else. I’m taking my laptop and iPad to read on. Might see if there is a telly I can hook my Xbox up to next time 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 26830 Posted May 28, 2018 Share Posted May 28, 2018 Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 26346 Posted May 28, 2018 Share Posted May 28, 2018 (edited) Aye, best of luck! Edited May 28, 2018 by ewerk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tdansmith 2107 Posted May 28, 2018 Share Posted May 28, 2018 1 hour ago, strawb said: Chemo starts in the morning. More worried about how bored I’m going to be in the hospital for 3 full days and overnight that owt else. I’m taking my laptop and iPad to read on. Might see if there is a telly I can hook my Xbox up to next time How long are you on hydration for ? Is it most of the three days ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tdansmith 2107 Posted May 28, 2018 Share Posted May 28, 2018 2 hours ago, ewerk said: Creep. I wasn't really serious you know. But you know that don't you. never mind Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tdansmith 2107 Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 (edited) 5 hours ago, ewerk said: Creep. You called me a creep because I joined in a thread talking about some 7 year old having a poo. Some of the comments were funny, his dad was proud, i thought I'd join in with the funny comments and a daft picture, seeing as the thread was full of cock and balls comments. I guess I made a mistake and my picture wasn't appropriate, well i'm sorry about that. But you felt the need to call me a creep..and as usual the gingerqueer jumped in after you with his usual snide comment. Sad cunts It's also kind of sad that you "liked" the post of someone telling us about having chemo.. you two faced fucking creep. Edited May 29, 2018 by Tdansmith 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rayvin 4964 Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 FFS Dan.. You made your first response post last night and this one at what... 3am? Was this literally keeping you up at night? You made a weird joke which everyone understood was a joke, and you copped some piss taking for it. No need to bring strawb's post into it and really no need to respond at all. In fact, you've probably now made sure that quiff will bring this up again in the future React less. For your own sake. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 26346 Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 30409 Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 Well he has got a shit sense of humour Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 At least got a couple of likes out of it so it'll save him doing it himself 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawb 3659 Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 Finally started chemo at half 7. Should be done by about 4am including fluids, rinse and repeat tomorrow. The boredom isn’t that bad yet but there is a complete whopper in my bay of 4 beds and I can’t be arsed with him already. He’s rude to the nurses and when I put my headset it to watch my iPad he said something snarky to the other fella about me not wanting to chat. Silly auld cunt, I hadn’t even turned the iPad on so heard every word. I’m going to get super petty with him if he carries on Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 34462 Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 Sounds pretty grim mate. Good luck with it. If that bloke carries on, put your headphones in and talk to him really loud as if you've got your music on full blast. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38763 Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 Have a massive, stinky shite in one of those cardboard pots, then slide it under his bed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawb 3659 Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 Tbh I’m just going to ignore him, will annoy him more because he’s one of them nebby cunts who wants to know everyone’s business. There are some class looking young nurses/doctors/whatever the specific colours mean, mooching about so im being kept entertained Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catmag 336 Posted May 29, 2018 Author Share Posted May 29, 2018 9 minutes ago, strawb said: Tbh I’m just going to ignore him, will annoy him more because he’s one of them nebby cunts who wants to know everyone’s business. There are some class looking young nurses/doctors/whatever the specific colours mean, mooching about so im being kept entertained You're not meant to be perving over the nurses man!! Although I feel like I can't tell you off given the circumstances. Enjoy, and we're all with you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawb 3659 Posted May 30, 2018 Share Posted May 30, 2018 12 hours ago, catmag said: You're not meant to be perving over the nurses man!! Although I feel like I can't tell you off given the circumstances. Enjoy, and we're all with you Aye course I am man! Feel remarkably chipper today, second dose about to start 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawb 3659 Posted June 8, 2018 Share Posted June 8, 2018 Dear diary. Been home a week, been dead spaced out and tired. Got fucking oral thrush cos my white blood cells died, nobody told me that was a possibility.. Going back in this morning for blood tests and another dose of chemo. Meant to be playing a in a charity football match this aft so if I feel well enough I’m going down to watch 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 12767 Posted June 8, 2018 Share Posted June 8, 2018 See if you can come on for the last 5 minutes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 26346 Posted June 8, 2018 Share Posted June 8, 2018 Fuck that. Start the match and arrange a guard of honour from all the players on the 26th minute. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew 4220 Posted June 13, 2018 Share Posted June 13, 2018 I'm fucking delighted! I'm directing a play in August and we've just got confirmation that the venue we've been after for weeks for it have accepted our application. I've wanted to do a show at this place for years! Oh man, I am so excited! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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