Dr Gloom 19837 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 I learned there was something scary called a cassowary. Then I googled it and found out it's a fucking bird! http://io9.com/the-absolute-worst-way-to-die-in-the-wild-is-death-by-c-638534080 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Kelly 1117 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Ok so it's a fucking big bird. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 14060 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 34592 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 The cunt that knocked me over didn't stop to see if I was ok either. I hope whoever did it is haunted by nightmares of the day he took an innocent life for the rest of his days. Fucking low life Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38791 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 A few hairy moments in my climbing days, mainly due to holds snapping off and that. Worst one was canoeing, I got pinned by a swamped canoe in an undercut cave by my legs. As I was dragged under the water and down, down, I was thinking "is this it?" Beers were on the daft twat that tipped and caused it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Park Life 70 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Think it would be close with this bird. It's got that look.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom 13872 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 A few hairy moments in my climbing days, mainly due to holds snapping off and that. Worst one was canoeing, I got pinned by a swamped canoe in an undercut cave by my legs. As I was dragged under the water and down, down, I was thinking "is this it?" Beers were on the daft twat that tipped and caused it. Holy shit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38791 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Think it would be close with this bird. It's got that look.... Climb a tree Then throw shit at it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38791 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Holy shit. Aye, those words went through my mind. Still got the scars down my shins from it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom 13872 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 I bet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 3997 Posted July 7, 2015 Author Share Posted July 7, 2015 I once choked on a bacon sandwich. I spluttered and coughed for a bit then dropped to my knees. Really thought I was a goner but somehow managed to hook a bit of it with my finger and pull it out. Always chew your food! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38791 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Cause of Death: Om Nom Nom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 34592 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Oh wait, I've remembered mine. Bar Oz, probably 2000. It was I think Christmas Eve or the day before. I was eating one of their massive burgers, took a bite that was too big to even chew properly, so I just swallowed it. It got halfway down and got stuck, but it was so big that it was blocking my windpipe too. I was just sat there with this thing stuck, too embarrassed to let people know I was choking and thinking "I'm gonna die on Christmas Eve. This will ruin Christmas forever for my family". I kept swallowing loads and nothing was happening but then it gradually started to move. It felt like millimetres but I just get swallowing over and over again and it gradually went down and I could breathe again. I didn't say anything to the people I was at the table with, but it completely ruined my lunch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 34592 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 I once choked on a bacon sandwich. I spluttered and coughed for a bit then dropped to my knees. Really thought I was a goner but somehow managed to hook a bit of it with my finger and pull it out. Always chew your food! "I eat my bacon sandwich like James Brown, how do you eat yours?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 9007 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Me too. I once took a toy off a kitten. It wasn't pleased. I would not fuck with a Cassowary. Bad tempered birds with a leg breaking kick. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 34592 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 I would not fuck with a Cassowary. Bad tempered birds with a leg breaking kick. Can confirm. Source: played Far Cry 4. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38791 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 They're a fucking pain in that game. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 9007 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Can confirm. Source: played Far Cry 4. You also discovered that Honey Badgers are bastards then? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 34592 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 They're a fucking pain in that game. They're fucking INSANE. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 34592 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 You also discovered that Honey Badgers are bastards then? Are they in it? I need to get back on it actually. I got laced by one too many cassowarys and turned it off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 34592 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 By the way, if it was real life I'd just jump on its back and choke it out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38791 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Bested by an overgrown spuggy. the SHAME! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howay 12460 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Oh wait, I've remembered mine. Bar Oz, probably 2000. It was I think Christmas Eve or the day before. I was eating one of their massive burgers, took a bite that was too big to even chew properly, so I just swallowed it. It got halfway down and got stuck, but it was so big that it was blocking my windpipe too. I was just sat there with this thing stuck, too embarrassed to let people know I was choking and thinking "I'm gonna die on Christmas Eve. This will ruin Christmas forever for my family". I kept swallowing loads and nothing was happening but then it gradually started to move. It felt like millimetres but I just get swallowing over and over again and it gradually went down and I could breathe again. I didn't say anything to the people I was at the table with, but it completely ruined my lunch. The politeness of your choking to death. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawb 3660 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Remembered another, quite young playing with my M.A.S.K figures, obviously put one of the figures in my mouth because why wouldn't you. Part of it come off and I started choking, me mother picked me up and ran across the road to a neighbour who was a nurse. She was carrying me upside down and battering me on the back, the part came out in the middle of the road, but I couldn't tell her cos she was hitting me so hard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 34592 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 The politeness of your choking to death. One doesn't like to create a fuss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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