Jump to content
Craig

The Bad Taste Joke Thread....

Recommended Posts

WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get

married again?"

HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"

WIFE: "Why not - don't you like being married?"

HUSBAND: "Of course I do."

WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?"

HUSBAND: "Okay, I'd get married again."

WIFE: "You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)."

HUSBAND: (makes audible groan).

WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?"

HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?"

WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?"

HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do."

WIFE: "Would you play golf with her?"

HUSBAND: "I guess so."

WIFE: "Would she use my golf clubs?"

HUSBAND: "No, she's left-handed."

WIFE: - - - silence - - -

HUSBAND: "Sh * t."

 

Not really bad taste, but made me smile :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest Sima

What's pink and makes women scream?

 

Stillborn.

 

 

 

Why can't Stevie Wonder read?

 

Because he's black.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
What's pink and makes women scream?

 

Stillborn.

 

 

 

Why can't Stevie Wonder read?

 

Because he's black.

30123[/snapback]

 

:D

 

Reminds me of that one Kevin Bloody Wilson track, when he's talking about his guitars:

 

"Do you like this guitar? This is a really interesting guitar in as much as I've just had it repainted, but it's got a very interesting pedigree. This used to belong to Stevie Wonder <long pause>. Fuckin' still does. He's probably crawling around his dressing room lookin' for the fuckin' thing."

Edited by Elric

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
What's pink and makes women scream?

 

Stillborn.

 

 

 

Why can't Stevie Wonder read?

 

Because he's black.

30123[/snapback]

 

:D

 

Heard a similar one of "Why does Stevie wonder smile all the time?

 

Cos he doesn't know he's black.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest alex
What's pink and makes women scream?

 

Stillborn.

 

 

 

Why can't Stevie Wonder read?

 

Because he's black.

30123[/snapback]

 

:dancing:

Heard a similar one of "Why does Stevie wonder smile all the time?

 

Cos he doesn't know he's black.

30205[/snapback]

 

To use your own phrase, 1985 just called, it wants its joke back. :D

Edited by alex

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

not offensive unless you're offended by bad jokes bu here goes anyway

 

guy in a restaurant gets the waiters attention "Excuse me, this chicken is rubbery"

 

The chinese waiter smiles "ahhh thank yo ver much" bows and walks off.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

How do you make a young girl cry twice?

Wipe your bloody cock on her teddybear

 

What do you call a Welshman with a sheep over both shoulders?

A Pimp.

 

What do you call a sheep with a runny nose?

Full.

 

Whats the best thing about an eight year old girl?

Turn her round shes an eight year old boy.

 

Whats dangerous and eats nuts?

Syphilis.

 

Whats the difference between a clit and a mobile phone?

Nothing, every cunts got one.

 

How do you get a gay, to fuck a women?

Shit in her cunt.

 

:D

Edited by Sargey

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Quentin Tarantino is making a new film in New Orleans. It's called Resivoir Wogs.

 

If New Orleans is the home of Jazz, then what the fuck are Katrina & the Waves doing there!?

Edited by WubbleUC

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
The police spotted four black men floating face down in the flood waters of New Orleans.

 

 

 

 

 

Apparently it was The Drifters.

31498[/snapback]

 

:lol:;)

 

:razz:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
The police spotted four black men floating face down in the flood waters of New Orleans.

 

 

 

 

 

Apparently it was The Drifters.

31498[/snapback]

 

:lol:;)

 

:nufc:

31500[/snapback]

 

"Let's do "up on the roof" i said. but no, you had to pick "Under the fucking Boardwalk" didn't you!!!"

31529[/snapback]

 

:razz::razz::rolleyes::nufc:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
The police spotted four black men floating face down in the flood waters of New Orleans.

 

 

 

 

 

Apparently it was The Drifters.

31498[/snapback]

 

:lol:;)

 

:nufc:

31500[/snapback]

 

"Let's do "up on the roof" i said. but no, you had to pick "Under the fucking Boardwalk" didn't you!!!"

31529[/snapback]

 

:razz::razz::rolleyes::nufc:

Class! :nufc:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Fucking quality!

 

I've just had the Mayor of New Orleans on the Phone, says this years Mardi Gras will have more floats than usual.

 

Skipping away from all the Orleans talk for a minute, I went to a Muslim Birthday Party last neet. Fucking hell man, fastest game of pass the parcel I've ever seen!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now


Recent tweets

Toontastic Facebook

Donate to Toontastic

Keeping the lights on since... well ages ago
TT-Staff


×