Billy Castell

Real name: Heywoisco or Tildo (the latter using my shortened first name) User name: Caston Santos Here are some more for you. Nile Ranger: Nilido Andy Carroll: Carreiro Sam Allardyce: Allardycisco Brian Shitwell (yes he does exist): Shitwisco Jan Vennigor of Hesselink: Vennigor Of Hesselinho Jermaine McSporran: McSporreta

I wondered why there was a 'Golden Bawls' headline. Anyway, Beckham getting a lifetime achievemnent award is a fucking joke. Good player, but not at the level of Phil Taylor, Ritchie McCaw, Pele, Michael Schumacher, Brian Clough, Alex Ferguson, Ross Braun or Tony McCoy.

Probably Lava Monsters chasing Michael Knighton's car down a lonely road.

Or like Sven, managing random African and Asian countries for a fat wedge of cash, before settling for some mediocre club career. Then finally managing a team in some oil-rich backwater called Al-Igater or Dinamo Turnip.

When we say earthquake in this country, its a mild wobble that you might just feel. And not some city-ripping lunacy with added liquifraction. However, I can guess what angle Sky News would be adopting.

Too late for an honoury mention for Vince Cable? I can imagine The Sun getting stuck into the Lib Dems tomorrow.

You seem to have sussed out the general perception of events. However, the next manager, as well as Kean are in a similar position to Keegan. For Llambias and Wise, read Jerome Anderson and Kentaro. Mrs. Desari, the big boss of the whole organisation had no understanding of football whatsoever, and the same goes for the Rao brothers who are the public faces of Venky's UK or whatever the British branch is called. Hence the presence of Kentaro and Jerome Anderson as advisors. The £5m may be a smokescreen so any players we're after don't get a Man City style inflation over fees. Or they really do know nothing. Time will tell. Oh, and I had thought that Rafa is a very over rated manager.

I think Venky's will offer a fat wedge in the summer for him to fuck up Blackburn. I doubt he'll come, but he's a 'big name' they think will bring success. News is that Steve Kean is manager until the summer at least.

He'd be too distracted by all the snow we're getting.

Is it official then? There has been a bit of confusion with conflicting reports recently. Have to see Sam's odds, if/when it happens.

Breaking News on SSN: Allardyce is settling down by the phone with an Irish coffee, waiting for Mr. Moratti to call. Obviously I'm making it up. Sam would be using one of those bluetooth headsets.

Are their wives/girlfriends hot?

Hope we are not 1 of those clubs. He was finished years ago.

So, he's got fans that have stuck with him and care about him...And this bothers you. This is the kind of attituede is why you've ended up with the Chiken farmers. Point proven. Thank you.

Some good tunes, but complete twats. I can't stand Morrissey or his hardcore fans who would use their tongues as his toilet roll and cry at the sight of him. Not very dignified way for a balding middle aged man to behave.

I now have this mental image of Brown doing a book signing in front of thousands of girls like he's in JLS, wearing some Kanye West style sun glasses and an updated Bay City Roller tartan attire in another misjudged attempt at being 'down with the kids.' And I won't mention the inpromptu rap in this vision.

Happy birthday. You've got the same birthday as my dad and one of my cousins.

I love the shrug of the shoulders at the end, as if to say "damn, nearly had her".

Carrie Fisher is going to be hounded by the Scientologists now. Firstly, she has stirred a shitstorm over of their star recruiters. Secondly, as a manic depressive, she has probably visited a psychiatist. Those scientology nuts have some odd views about that profession. And finally, they use all manner of dirty tricks and legal wrangling to silence opponents.

Blackburn Rovers-coming to a dodgy kebab shop near you!

In the words of Mills Lane, Let's get it on.

Gavin Peacock...............wasn't he a God botherer? I remember a call to 606 when Danny Baker hosted it years ago that said he was so offended by the rest of the team watching some bad porno film on the bus that he travelled in with the bags below decks.

I'd be happy with a decent manager, a creative midfielder................................. This is for Parky: The title makesme think of that Marilyn Manson song that goes 'white trash get down on your knees/It's time for cake and sodomy'.

A truely dire replacement for Colin Hendry.

WTF It was his protest at the club being fined because he saidthe ref had a bad game the previous match. Heiniken Cup rules are stupidly harsh about any form of criticism, so he was making a point by talking like a retard.