Ayatollah Hermione

You’re going to have to narrow that one down. There’s loads of them that look like the baddies from the Ninja Turtles

Friend of my mates was talking to Edwards in a pub and he was saying he apparently gets really bad DMs about people raping his wife as a result of his tweets but he still carries on. It’s either the mark of a sociopath or a deranged attention seeker.

Also hungover but not from red wine so I can simply have a recovery can and go about my day. God bless recovery cans.

Fucking hell, it must be good if you’ve cracked a smile

Aye, get in a fight with a pissed up radge packet at last orders. That'll knock the pounds off you.

Like when two right nasty bastards team up to fight Spiderman (Fish can fill the blanks in). Except in this case, Spiderman is a total cunt as well.

Finished Snowpiercer. It reminds me of Murder on the Orient Express. In MOTOE, there’s a murder on a train and in Snowpiercer, there’s a murder on a train

Granted, I think one of them is a Bournemouth player so technically only just Championship Not to go ITK as well but apparently we’ve watched that Eze from QPR all season but will almost certainly be outbid

This is going to be messy for months, isn't it?

I definitely rated Rondon. FACTAMUNDO

Must have hurt when Sunderland thought they were friends with Man City after that embarrassing poznan away at Man United, only for them to join in with the rest of the country when they tumbled down the leagues.

Mind, I hope they go bust before our eventual slide into League One

Like when you wanted to plunge an entire league of clubs into debt on the off chance you could stop being fucking shit for five minutes to make the playoffs in League One, you mean? And then decided that was the moral high ground because that’s what worked for you? Like when you defended a nonce because he scored past us? You are out of your depth here. Quit while you’re behind, you tit

Actually don’t believe that tbh. If he’s desperate to sell, he’ll be as annoyed as the rest. Ashley moving the goalposts, I mean. Not Tim the Quim’s embarrassing effort there.

Aye, the sooner the “big” clubs fuck off to their little Super League, the better.

You weren’t impressed with Rondon over Joselu and that went well so #BringThemIn

Would love to hear the true story but doubt we ever will.

Game over says Sky

Would take Wilson or King on the cheap but we’ll be outbid and end up with Dan Gosling back

here man

Maybe we'll get lucky with our transfers. Never mind.

Just another day in the perfectly normal takeover saga. These are all routine proceedings.

Apologies to Peter Damage for getting this news incorrect. He could never fill Neil Redfearn’s shoes.

Welcome our new Under 23s manager Thats Shola sorting the loans and Ramage coaching the kids if you’re keeping track.

Time for the sobering reality of Chris Basham. Cheap Sheffield United cast-offs who they’ll be hoping will take low wages because he’s a Geordie.