Ayatollah Hermione

It's great, man. If the weather stays nice, just leave it on in the background and lie about.

Looking at him, I'd say mid-30s but if you can figure out when he started at the Chronicle, you might be able to be more accurate.

I like to use Sporting Life as it has its own dedicated transfer page and lists the confirmed ins and outs down each side of it. SSN etc. are awful to follow on Twitter because they just throw any old shite out; at least with SL, it's presented in a nice, clean way. For instance, I had no idea Chelsea released Benayoun until I popped on there.

I'd put you through the coffee table, stare my mother right in the eyes and tell her that the game has changed, son.

Here's my current "Heard and Liked" list but, keeping in mind, I'm STILL struggling to get caught up since this year has been mental. Vampire Weekend - Modern Vampires of The City Uncle Acid and The Deadbeats - Mind Control Daft Punk - Random Access Memories The Knife - Shaking the Habitual Kurt Vile - Walkin on a Pretty Daze Jim James - Regions of Light and Sound Kanye West - Yeezus Justin Timberlake - 20/20 David Bowie - The Next Day William Tyler - Impossible Truth Disclosure - Settle (at least, half of it) Inc. - No World Vampire Weekend and Jim James jump out as my favourites with Yeezus growing on me with each listen. I think Disclosure runs out of steam halfway through but hopefully it clicks with me in time. My current "To-Listen" list: A$AP Rocky - Long Live A$AP Boards of Canada - Tomorrow’s Harvest Youth Lagoon - Wondrous Bughouse After Dark 2 Comp Colleen - The Weighing of The Heart Sam Amidon - Bright Sunny South Kyle Hall - Boat Party Autre Ne Veut - Anxiety Parquet Courts - Light Up Gold Villagers - Awayland Laura Marling - Once I Was An Eagle The Dear Hunter - Migrant Queens of the Stone Age - Like Clockwork Hopefully I'll have rattled through them in the next week. Anything I should just avoid?

I'd be exactly like Prince.

If my fatha tried to stop me doing anything at 21, other than smoking crack or something, I'd probably just laugh. And being 21, she'll definitely know more about routers than you, turn off any locks you put on and probably never trust you again. I hope you're satisfied. So, between internet friends, what's she been up to? Buying laughing gas off your credit card? Subscribing to dodgy Japanese porn sites? Has she blocked you on Twitter?

It's life insurance you want if you're stepping in the ring with me

I hope you post this every 5 pages

But, by gum, we'll sell enough players to make sure there is a place for him!

Leazes has taken this a bit too far now like.

Ha, and could Kinnear not have helped experienced Premier League footballer Kevin Nolan settle into a new club? EDIT: Whoops, HF got there first. And I wonder who didn't help any of that?

Looking at the recently released list makes for terrifying reading as I can easily see us poaching a couple to "add depth" in the last week of August. Pardew loves a shit big man up front and there's a lot of them going.

Typical of CT to bring up Nolan to defend Kinnear when it took Hughton to get him playing well. Selective memory.

I think the pair of you have cracked.

I know you wouldn't think it but HF's nephew is actually 6 foot 3.

Leave them on the bottom shelf of the oven, don't fry them.

Will be very unhappy if @YourService can't do anything with this.

Your technique looks shite, mate.

The Incredible Sting Band. Lots of Police songs rearranged in avant-garde style as the man himself sits and brings himself to tantric climax. **/*****

Changing the bed sheets for me is a right fuck on for me since one side of my bed is against the wall so if anyone would like to come in and change the sheets for me, I can always rustle you up a cheese toastie and a bag of prawn cocktail crisps.

Well, he's a midfielder but we can't speak for his personality. He could be defensive, he could be very open-minded.

The Muppets - I didn't like it. The pig woman did not respect the lizard

I'll add it to the list, ta. It's getting a bit out of control though; still not listened to Disclosure's album yet and I meant to get round to that at the start of the month. It's been a mad year for releases.