Ayatollah Hermione

Maybe it's Cahill who is xenophobic and can't stand foreigners even talking to him? makes you think. namaste

He's only 30 so give him a couple of years. Just as Sammy is finishing up his glittering career at the Toon, in comes another Ameobi.

What if he just called him "a right fucking bender" and tried to flick his lug? Called him a "hairy kangaroo shagger" and farted on his bracket when he was on the deck?

Making room for Danny "Off the Line" Simpson

Had a nightmare with injuries as well, Roeder. Couldn't have done much worse than Allardyce, mind, christ alive.

They reckon the shock won't be with who is left out but rather who's going. Scholes out of retirement? Beckham? Perch?

New Mars Volta album. As always, it takes about 3 month for it to gel in my head. Well worth it if you like them; more straight-up alternative rock with some weird little time structures and song shapes. Nonsense lyrics as always.

England squad

No way it was racist like You can fuck somebody off without calling them whatever it is you can call an Australian.

Pardew sets up a news conference, flicks the v's at Cahill and the past-it knacker can fuck off.

The joy he's brought into our lives can't be doubted. Long may it continue.

She'll be reincarnated just in time for Christmas for a dramatisation no doubt.

Yawn. That run by a Man U fan by any chance?

Congrats, kidda.

Have you got Stevie's to post? I'd love to see the edited one

Henry and Cattermole would just keep their sterling disciplinary record against us going tbh. That's, literally, the first thing O'Neill needs to change; they just go on a proper blob strop against us in lieu of actually trying to outplay us.

Good move considering he is blatantly the problem. amazes me that Liverpool fans are willing to wait it out with him.

Fair enough. We've been out of Europe for a bit though, does that not knacker us a bit? Does it go off coefficient or how you entered?

Class. They obviously interviewed a few people and he stood out though. I think they've put a lot of new systems in place that, at least for now, are working nicely with one another. Whether they'll be enough to keep us in the top 5/6 season after season will be the test. It's a bit harsh to call them lucky but someone like Tiote for £3 million and having him settle immediately carries a bit of good fortune, no matter how comprehensive the scouting.

The playoff final and CL final don't overlap, do they?

As for Xisco and Smith, if we get rid of both of them in the summer, that's £5 million a year we're saving. Five million pounds.

I'm glad we're going to be playing some decent teams, rather than a bunch of postmen from Uzbekistan tbh. Gives us something to properly test ourselves with. As for the qualification, it's not going to be easy; there's a chance we can play Inter Milan, for example which could end our campaign there and then. We've got to hope the new players brought in can improve the squad enough where we can get through this qualifier no matter what, then it's just a case of juggling the workload. If the squad is big enough, you could very easily play the likes of Shola, Gosling, Ferguson, Marveaux, Perch, Taylor in midweek (or vice versa if we're playing a shite side in the PL) leaving others well rested for the PL game. I can't wait.

They'll have "World Class" Carlos Cuellar at the back, man. Shitting myself.

Steve Kean DRAMA BOMB

Will add you all tonight and send rude messages.