Dazzler

I mean, it's a bin wagon with his name on the side of it. It's more of a self-own than it is cool and edgy. He's also in the passenger seat because he's too fucking brain dead to drive it.

He's a chihuahua isn't he?

The Mackem Cewk Sheyt (one side of A4)

Page 5 That's it, marra if yeh still looking for something to eayt you'll either neyd to garn back to page 1, or have yeh tried eayting yeh sister mars beyf curtains?

Page 3 - Wey have Dicksons at home Garn to Lidl and buy the cheypest, shittest sausages. Whilst ya there chaw some stotteys, and peyse pudding. Once tha Nigereyin with the SIA badge stops chasing yeh, mak ya way home. Stick the sausages in the air fryer and cut yeh stotteys and lather them up in the hoistey peayse pudding. Put the chip pan on and stick some gravey granewls in the centuries old lard once it's melted. Put that mess in your best sports direct mug. Whack the under cewked sausages in the bun. Dip in the mug, and enjoy tha best savaloy dip money won't buy, marras.

THE MACKEM CEWKBEWK (HARDBACK) | alovesupreme "Page 1 - Homemade pink slices for ya marras. First get some flour, stick it in yeh mar's best pyrex dish. Hoy a few eggs in it and whisk it up peweh well. Next yeh neyd to get some sugar, stick loads in if yeh want - wa dinnit have any teyth to worry abewt. Finally, stick some 'pink' in it - Aah find it's best the yewse seyts from the stadium, but yeh can substitute the seyt for yeh best faded reg vardy shirt - but only the red stripes marra - dinnit tak the piss. Once yeh've done aal that stick the dish in the oven for a half hour on gas mark 6 - if yeh've connected up to ya neighbours supply to tak their gas then whack it up to a 7, but mak sheweh yeh tamper with that meyteh so tha dinnit find out. After a half hour tak the dish out the oven and let the horrible mess kewl down on the windeh sill for 20 minutes. Cut to serve. Garns well with: tha cheyse slices ya keyp in ya pocket."

Turning up in a bin wagon in a hi-viz to call his opponents and their supporters garbage after he's been gaslighting Biden for doing the same is peak Trump. Genuinely, hope he fucking snuffs it sharpish.

or Both valid.

"You said you weren't going to invest in the NHS and here you are, the lying fucking bitch that you are, investing in the NHS. Where do you get off?" The only appropriate response is: "Are you completely mental?"

Can you save up some chores or DIY projects for the weekend then, please? Thanks.

1-0 Arteta to blame the ref and cry - again.

My place isn't big enough to cause that kind of carnage tbf. I'd be on board with it if it literally put a stop to all emails for a while.

I get personally offended when people don't understand this simple concept.

At what point does Lara Ulrich show up crying about how badly napster damaged him personally as he cries into fresh $100 dollar bills that he subsequently throws onto a fire to keep warm?

I don't think I've even seen a fax machine since I left my first job and went to Siemens 14 years ago

I hate it when Simon Jordan says things I agree with.

"Scratch that lads turns out I had to sign off my leave requests with a quart of blood so I've wrapped it in." Fucking work shy cunt.

You've ensured that the predictions are even more fucking stupid moving forward.

RTG will have us sold to the Venky’s by Christmas.

I think he never recovered from that Declan Rice jealous rage tackle tbh. Once he got back on the pitch he was always nervous on the ball, and has gone down too easily. He looked head and shoulders above Rice for me up until that point.

"The stars are just specks of paint that our alien overlords placed there to fool us into thinking there was more." - Average Rogan guest. "That's crazy. Hey Jamie, pull up that one video of the gorilla lifting a tyre over his head and shitting on the spot." - Joe Rogan.

Basically Andrew Shulz, Shane Gillis, Mark Normand and Andrew Santino are the only ones I can think of who have had any form of success that have been regulars on his podcast and I'd argue in the case of Santino and Gillis it's in spite of their friendship with Rogan. Theo Von too but he's just mental, and when you extrapolate out from his highlight reel on tik tok he's canny shite - I blame Rogan for him. Shulz is one who probably would have made it on his own - he's effectively the American version of that ginger scouse cunt that's everywhere because he does mediocre crowd work. I think they all feel they owe Rogan a debt because he gave them a platform - and outside of his absolute mental opinions I think he's probably a half decent bloke, and a loyal friend but because he smokes too much tac and talks about the moon landings being faked he appeals to the thick and mentally unstable which is also who Trump appeals to.

Unless of course Howe and Ashworth really did hate each other.

I just remembered you were there. It all makes sense now.