Dazzler

Fuck, someone beat me to it by half an hour

Only one man for the job

Well that's just incendiary language and I fully support it.

I'm sat watching what we do in the shadows to get over the match. If you haven't seen it you absolutely should. The film is great, but the series is even better. Anything with Matt Berry is pretty much nailed on to be mint IMO.

Except when he tried to end Lejeune's (I think) career. Not the first time he'd done that either. He's a boring cunt off the pitch but a complete dirty bastard on it.

Should have let Trippier give him a slap. It was a shit performance, but it's not like we were blessed with game changers on the bench.

It would be a longer suspension if he was on tonight. Straight red for knifing some cunt after this performance.

Are they kicking these extra balls on the pitch on purpose? Happening way too fucking often.

Just shows how important Bruno is. I don't think we've ever played well without him, even when he hasn't played at his best.

Longstaff back to blagging balls over the bar.

An actual child up front with zero senior experience says it all really. Still though, we've not been up for it at all.

We've shit the bed here. Bournemouth could get another one, quite easily.

Was just about to say I'm away to do the dishes

Stick Murphy on and go three at the back is the only obvious one. Or Diallo and go 442 with Gordon central again.

Watch him score now

Fucking hell man, I was only kidding.

Hoy Murphy, Diallo and Parkinson on. We're clearly going to lose so we might as well let the youngins have their moods battered too.

Fucking hell man. Might knock this off now and have a tug. Either way I'll be crying and ashamed.

The way these are playing here if we had a full squad we'd be 3 up by now. They are defensively suspect, but we don't have the quality on the pitch to exploit it, it seems.

Or if you're a corner flag or the back of mitros heed.

Good ball in. Shame we've no strikers in our squad.

Should be about 4-0 if we're being honest

And Ritchie is already on for Miggy