acrossthepond

Tomorrow's Mirror: "Toon chase Anderlecht's Xherdan Shaqiri! Managing director Derek Llambias's extensive scouting network identified this player as a '125-pointer'."

Well according to you, after the weekend he'll be the 'bin-dipping scum' who's gonna rip Blackburn's defence apart with his delivery. Good luck, your gonna need it. And hope your not forgeting the scum you's have cheered for each week, Mssrs Savage and El Hadji-everyone hates me-Diouf. Jog On son! No need for that. He's entitled to his opinion, and it's nothing that many of our fans, myself included, weren't saying about him ourselves prior to this season. I don't think Barton will ever play again for England simply because of his image. He could score 15 and still wouldn't be selected - never mind that Stevie 'Mike Tyson's Punch-Out' Geeeeeeeeeeee has arguably been just as bad but continues to be one of England's golden boys.

Here, didn't I tell you? Look at his response (in red text) to Fish. Apparently Jonas is the reason Enrique's form has been on the 'wain.' (It's wane, you plank.) This thread was actually just another slightly more subtle anti-Jonas thread from CT. Jonas Gutierrez is not a good winger. I'm not sure what he is, but he's not a good winger; however, he is the best out-and-out winger we have available for selection. He's better than Routledge, Lua Lua, Ferguson, and any other kid and/or unborn fetus and/or pre-conception twinkle in a Geordie mam's eye that we have. The way you carry on about him and ascribe all of our team's shortcomings to him is cringeworthy. It's perfectly fair to say he's no good and we should buy a better replacement - some might say we already have in HBA, since Hughton dropped Jonas to play him on the left earlier in the season. It's not fair to suggest that he's at fault for Enrique's poor form (which is actually just a minor dip over the past two games coincident with when ALL of our team was playing like shit, viz. Fulham and Arsenal first half) or any of the other things you blame him for. We played terribly against WBA and Bolton? Jonas's fault. We sold Carroll? Jonas's fault. Meteor heading for the Earth? Jonas's fault. Change the record ffs.

Fuck off.

Don't think there's any doubt that Enrique is better than the shower of shite at left-back in this league, bar A. Cole and Evra. But after thinking about it a bit, I think this thread is actually about Jonas and how terrible he is and how he's causing Enrique to be poor as a result. Obsessed tbh.

Is this meant to be the very early "lowering of expectations" thread for when we sell Enrique in July? He had off games against Fulham and Arsenal (1st half) but name one player who didn't.

God willing though, we will potentially have four players who could play left wing in Benny, Kaz, Fergie and Jonas. I've like some of the clips ive seen of Nzogbia lately, but I still wouldnt want the whinging fuck back. Blows too hot and cols as well, with more emphasis on the cold. benny, kaz and fergie? tbh, i think ben arfa is the only one at the club who could play wide left better than nzogbia. but the lack of strikers mean he'll probably play mroe centrally anyway. i'm more concerned by the potential signing of aliadiare than re-signing a good player. he's dogshit. They've started up their own band now. Fergie wanted to be the lead singer but the other two told him to pipe down since his voice hasn't cracked yet and Fergie is a girl's name anyway, so they put him on drums since he's tough from gaelic. Speaking of Gs, Hatem, or to use his stage name "Benny Arfa Brain" lays down the sick beats in French-inflected Arabic or Arabic-inflected French (both unintelligible to anyone who doesn't already know what he's saying) and Kaz is the bassist since he can't prance about the stage (Mrs. Nolan's garage) with a broken leg.

Stoke-ing fires of Rivalry? Stokoe-ing, more like.

Larsson I think it was, but ofc Ashley was too tight to stump up the cash. For all that he's been ridiculed, even loaning Xisco out was a mistake. The squad was simply too thin to be letting players leave on loan.

I think you may be talking about Lee Trundle?

Spending money isn't what the current regime specialises in. I'd say they specialise in doing the opposite. I know what you mean like.

The only 'plan' is to run this club at a profit. Clubs ran at a profit will not be successful. Therefore, we will never again be a successful club with the current ownership. Signing some promising players and having a handful of good results do not and never will change the basic fact that our owner's priority is not to see NUFC succeed in the league, in cups, in anything. It is to make money, and all of his efforts are focused on attaining that goal. Many people on this board will be content to quibble over the definition of 'success' and how 'successful' the previous board(s) were, but in your hearts you all know exactly what I am talking about. We will never compete at a meaningful level as long as Ashley owns us.

Pardew said he was 4-5 weeks from fitness in the press conference today. I wonder what else he was lying about. if he does return for the next game he'll lose all credibility. i'd say the same for the club if it wasn't already the case. He has no credibility already. If he wasn't lying about Carroll, then he was the unwitting patsy of FMA and Diamond Dekka. Either way he doesn't have a clue what's going on above, just like Kinnear.

I'm not going to waste anyone's time cursing and blinding over what a terrible decision this was, what a pack of lies we've been fed, what a terrible owner Ashley is and how he doesn't have the club's best interests at heart, etc etc. It's been done to death already on this board. Ashley and his cronies are liars or puppets, end of. But I would like an Ashley apologist to explain the 10:30pm/10:45 pm bids for N'Zogbia - bids that we had to know would never be accepted, and even had they been, bids for a player who would never have come here, and even had he been inclined to, with whom we would never have agreed personal terms considering he knocked Brum back in the summer and we're apparently on a 35k p/w ceiling or whatever it might be.

No, but relying on Shola, Lovenkrands, Ranger and "Besty" is. This is it. I'm not really worrying about moaning about whether the replacement(s) we bring in are as good as Carroll, but we need to get at least decent strikers in now.

Ricky Lovenkrands?

I hope absolutely no-one is surprised. Been on the cards ever since this mystery 'injury' materialised, although I'll say I expected him to go to Spurs, not Liverpool. Gutted. He can fuck off, Pardew can fuck off, and especially Fat Mike can fuck off. Didn't they release some statement about how we let Geordie talent like Shearer and Carrick "slip through our fingers"? What do you call this, you swollen southern cunt?

It's far more than he's worth. Too bad we'll never see that money reinvested. EDIT: Milner all over again tbh.

Andy Carroll is... THE RUNNING MAN!

They've signed a 21-year-old LB from Espanyol, Vila I think his name is, so it looks like this one is a non-starter thankfully.

He's shite and I look forward to his inevitable string of shit performances, except the one against us where he scores five. HBA's full surname is "Ben Arfa", not "Arfa." If you called him that, you'd just be giving him arfa name.

He thinks he lives Goodfellas.

He'll never walk over this imo.

Yemen... http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-middle-east-12295864 I'm not picky, but Egypt atm is key in the buttressing of Israel. If that goes then the local politics and supplies for Palestine will radically improve. Don't count on it mate. Clinging to power is all that Hosni Mubarak knows how to do and he will continue to hang on until he falls down dead.