David Kelly

I certainly don't think it's his agenda to have us as a plaything unless he's like the neighbour kid on Toy Story who just likes to torment the toys. I think he got rinsed somewhat by Hall and his orginal idea of having us a quick moneymaker got fucked when he found out about the debt. Now his only interest is getting his money back out in the quickest way he can which means taking back a sum each year until he can sell it for a reasonable amount and get his money back. On that basis he wants us to stay up but won't finance an attack on the top of league as doesn't represent value for money for him. Working to that I think we will always be very tight on what we will pay for any player and we will always have a few on their resale value.

Remy and Bent would vastly improve our squad but I still think we are lacking out wide and that's the area I would have really liked to see us go for if we were really showing ambition.

Man of Steel. Not at all bad. I thought Shannon was good as Zod and Cavell certainly looked the part as Superman (although I didn't think he was given much acting to do). Sets it up decently for future parts of the franchise. The only thing that I thought was a bit shit was the action scenes involving the spaceships. They seemed exactly the same as the last transformers film and the Avengers. We've seen that now, come up with something original please! Premium Rush. Decent action thriller with Joseph Gordon Levitt as an adrenilin junkie bike messenger who gets chased around New York by Michael Shannon's dirty cop. Nothing particularly original or unexpected but a decent watch all the same.

We already had some sort of tie in with that bet butler didn't we? This just suggests that making attempts to increase our sponsorship revenue which is no bad thing at all.

Their chairman has apparently said he's going, we make what appears to be a perfectly good offer for a player in the last year of his contract and they're now taking the piss over the fee. I don't blame us at all for telling them to do one but by acting so slowly we've backed ourselves into a corner which is going to mean that getting any good deals becomes harder and harder. If we really want to sign anyone (and I'm far from certain we do) we are going to have to accept that we might have to pay more for them than we want.

Tbf, if we're going to have a gaming and betting partner, online betting companies are the ones to have!

I worry about how we're going to set up a team with two strikers now. Three of our main players are Sissoko, Cabaye & Tiote so I'f we're moving back to 4-4-2 how do we fit those three in? On top of that we have the problem of not really having any wingers (obviously I'm not classing Jonas as a winger any more because he seems to have lost all of his attacking inclinations and I'm not counting Obertan as he's fucking gash!).

Williamson is a better bet as a centreback than Perch like and now he's forth choice rather than third so the depth is better there. Our back up at leftback was Perch or Shane at the start of last season. Now it's Haidara or Dummet. Our back up at rightback was Perch or Tavernier. Now it's Santon and that's behind Debuchy rather than Wilson. Right and Left wing are exactly the same as they were last season. In the centre of the park we have Sissoko over Perch and we also have Bigi with a seasons experience and we've lost Perch. Up front we've lost Ba and gained Gouffran. The only position we're currently worse off is striker and even there we have had one in one out just not of the same quality. We do have better depth than last season clearly.

New contract to be announced in the next few weeks I bet!

You needed his IP address to know he's a makem? You're slipping Tom!

The fact that those players we signed in January are here does make a massive difference though. Simpson only had a couple of games after Debuchy signed, Gosling played fuck all, Harper barely got a run out (anyway you look at it he was third choice), Raylor didn't play all season, Ranger had two sub appearences all season, Fergusson had a few run outs but barely anything from January. The only players who have left that have any baring are Ba (who clearly needs replacing although I would still argue that a fair portion of the goals he scored would have been scored by Cisse if he'd played as a striker in more of those games) and Perch. And Perch only played because we had such a wretched time with injuries. Cisse shouldn't be included unless he goes. I'm not saying we're not short by any means as we clearly need two strikers even with Cisse and personally I think we desperately need someone to play on the left, but stats like the ones .com have put up are misleading.

You're spot on, footballers move for money that's it. Some of the very best who are already on a disgusting amount may make their descision based on challenging for honours and fewer still will shun a move to stay at a club they love (like Shearer or Le Tissier) but those players are few and far between. They do a job and they want to get the most money they can for doing it. Why people think they should show and any loyalty is beyond me.

Let's face facts. Pretty much all premiership players are cunts of the highest order. We pay them to play football for us not to be nice people. As long as they play well who gives a fuck if they're arseholes (obviously anyone's who's a rapist should be locked up and playing football but I'm working on the assumption that he's innocent at this stage).

Aye I'd recommend watching it any way that gets you to the important parts (ie Rosario's shaven haven) as quickly as possible.

The whole rape argument is fair enough. Altough none of us have any knowlege of what's going on there, it may be a nothing charge (it's hardly being given much attention in the press which I would think it would if there was much chance of him going down for it). I can also understand anyone who would have bad feelings towards him for fucking us about last time (although as JawD said he had no obligations or ties to us and they were offering him more money, life in London and at the time looked more like a club looking to move forward than we did). But I don't get anyone knocking how he played for QPR. He scored some good goals, looked threatening and was generally one of their only bright spots. For me he's shown that he can cut it in this league and I think he'd be a good player for anyone who got him.

Of the strikers we've been linked with recently, Remy is the best from what I've seen. The way he fucked us off in January does leave a bitter taste in the mouth but I'd love to see him try and justify it if he signed!

Oblivion. A shite hybrid of Independence Day and Moon (and not in the same class as either of those). Trance. Rosario Dawson full frontal nudity, professor x (young version) and the bloke from La Haine with a story something to do with a stolen picture and hypnotherapy. Needless to say based on the first part of my last sentance, it's the best film ever made!

I've watched most of the first season of IASIP and it's building up quite nicely. Danny Devito joins it in the second season if I'm not mistaken.

Gignac is also shite from what I've seen if him. He would be a totally underwhelming signing.

If we could actually bat we'd virtually have won this test already!

Definitely the first time I've heard that as anything against the fat cunt. My mate is terrified of Jews so if there'd been a hint of that mentioned he'd be straight on it. The fact is he's a twat we all hate because if what he's done to our club. If he'd led us to glory he could be a Muslim nazi and none of us would give a flying fuck!

Clearly this means you've see Kinnear as your father but would like to be involved in a sexual relationship with him and Sir Alex. Absolute text book!

From his goals on Youtube, he looks pretty strong, predominantly right footed, technically decent with good movement in the box.

Wiki says that we were after him under Keegan. His scoring records canny, not far off a goal every two games for Lyon over the past couple of seasons and a regular judging by the number of games he's played. I've only seen odd bits of him here and there for France though so I wouldn't like to say how good he is.

And that's only because our owner is a cunt!