walkinthedog

tbh I can't possibly see how anyone would get snakes on a plane in the current global climate, especially one with Samuel Jackson on. All seems a tad far-fetched to me.

I'll have to try that.....gimme a minute.

Think I missed that one, hopefully they might repeat it one day and the next and the next.

'So you don't know the way to France either?'

Hicks is, apparently, the comedians comedian. Huge balls and hilarious. He didn't just witter on about smelly people on buses and wanking with your wrong hand he made people think. Still missed. I've seen Noble twice and he is very clever, totally silly and absolutely hilarious. Not sure about his longevity though. An australian comedian called Dave Hughes, very dry. Bobby Thomson first comedian I ever heard, fucking great 'Whey man they're dropping bombs not pork pies!' Class. Jasper Carrot is a nobber. Saw Jack Dee once, I was in the front row in uncontrollable hysterics and he (sarcastically) asked me if I was alright. My sides really did hurt the next day.

Nice one Noelie, do you have a web cam you can point at the telly?

no worries, cut of the winnings though eh?

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Ashley Cole Arsenal £5.0m 0 104 Clichy Arsenal £2.5m 0 107 Cygan Arsenal £2.0m 0 110 Djourou Arsenal £2.5m 0 113 Eboue Arsenal £3.0m 0 119 Lauren Arsenal £3.0m 0 122 Senderos Arsenal £4.5m 0 125 Toure Arsenal £5.5m 0 128 Bouma Aston Villa £1.0m 0 131 G Cahill Aston Villa £1.5m 0 134 De La Cruz Aston Villa £2.0m 0 137 Delaney Aston Villa £2.0m 0 140 A Hughes Aston Villa £2.0m 0 143 M Laursen Aston Villa £1.5m 0 146 Mellberg Aston Villa £2.0m 0 149 Ridgewell Aston Villa £3.0m 0 152 Samuel Aston Villa £1.0m 0 155 M Gray Blackburn £2.5m 0 158 Khizanishvili Blackburn £2.5m 0 161 Neill Blackburn £3.5m 0 164 Nelsen Blackburn £4.0m 0 167 Todd Blackburn £2.5m 0 170 Ben Haim Bolton £4.0m 0 176 Hunt Bolton £1.5m 0 179 Jaidi (N/A) Bolton £2.5m 0 180 A Meite Bolton £2.5m 0 182 J O'Brien Bolton £1.5m 0 185 El Karkouri Charlton Athletic £2.0m 0 188 J Fortune Charlton Athletic £1.5m 0 191 Hreidarsson Charlton Athletic £3.0m 0 194 Sorondo Charlton Athletic £2.0m 0 197 L Young Charlton Athletic £2.5m 0 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Manchester City £3.0m 0 305 Dunne Manchester City £3.0m 0 308 Jordan Manchester City £2.0m 0 310 Trabelsi Manchester City £2.5m 0 311 Sun Jihai Manchester City £2.0m 0 312 Richards Manchester City £3.5m 0 313 J Arca Middlesbrough £2.5m 0 314 Ehiogu Middlesbrough £3.0m 0 315 Davies Middlesbrough £3.0m 0 316 Taylor Middlesbrough £3.0m 0 317 Queudrue Fulham £3.0m 0 320 Parnaby Middlesbrough £3.5m 0 323 Pogatetz Middlesbrough £2.0m 0 326 Riggott Middlesbrough £4.0m 0 329 Babayaro Newcastle United £2.0m 0 335 Bramble Newcastle United £2.5m 0 338 Carr Newcastle United £2.0m 0 341 Ramage Newcastle United £2.0m 0 344 Stephen Taylor Newcastle United £2.0m 0 346 S Campbell Portsmouth £3.0m 0 347 G Johnson Portsmouth £2.0m 0 350 A O'Brien Portsmouth £2.0m 0 353 Primus Portsmouth £2.5m 0 359 Stefanovic Portsmouth £2.0m 0 362 Matt Taylor Portsmouth £3.0m 0 365 Ingimarsson Reading £2.0m 0 368 Sonko Reading £2.0m 0 371 Shorey Reading £2.0m 0 374 Murty Reading £2.0m 0 375 Sodje Reading £1.5m 0 377 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↓Value↓ ↓Points↓ 501 Diaby Arsenal £3.0m 0 503 Fabregas Arsenal £5.0m 0 505 Flamini Arsenal £3.5m 0 507 Gilberto Arsenal £5.0m 0 509 Hleb Arsenal £4.5m 0 511 Ljungberg Arsenal £3.5m 0 513 Rosicky Arsenal £4.5m 0 515 Barry Aston Villa £3.5m 0 517 Berger Aston Villa £2.0m 0 519 Steven Davis Aston Villa £4.0m 0 521 Hendrie Aston Villa £1.0m 0 523 McCann Aston Villa £3.0m 0 525 Milner Newcastle United £2.5m 0 527 Bentley Blackburn £3.0m 0 529 Emerton Blackburn £2.0m 0 531 Mokoena Blackburn £2.5m 0 533 Gamst Pederson Blackburn £4.0m 0 535 Peter Blackburn £3.0m 0 537 S Reid Blackburn £4.0m 0 539 Savage Blackburn £3.5m 0 541 Tugay Blackburn £2.5m 0 543 Campo Bolton £2.0m 0 545 A Faye Bolton £2.5m 0 546 Q Fortune Bolton £2.5m 0 547 Stelios Bolton £4.5m 0 549 Nolan Bolton £4.5m 0 551 Speed Bolton £3.0m 0 553 Idan Tal Bolton £1.5m 0 555 Ambrose Charlton Athletic £2.0m 0 556 Bolanos Charlton Athletic £2.0m 0 557 Holland Charlton Athletic £2.0m 0 559 B Hughes Charlton Athletic £2.0m 0 561 Kishishev Charlton Athletic £2.0m 0 563 Rommedahl Charlton Athletic £2.0m 0 565 Thomas Charlton Athletic £2.0m 0 567 Ballack Chelsea £8.0m 0 569 J Cole Chelsea £5.5m 0 571 Duff Newcastle United £4.0m 0 573 Geremi Chelsea £2.0m 0 575 Lampard Chelsea £8.0m 0 577 Makelele Chelsea £4.5m 0 578 Mikel Chelsea £3.0m 0 579 Robben Chelsea £5.0m 0 581 S Wright-Phillips Chelsea £3.0m 0 583 Essien Chelsea £4.5m 0 585 Arteta Everton £3.5m 0 587 Simon Davies Everton £1.5m 0 589 T Cahill Everton £4.5m 0 591 Carsley Everton £2.0m 0 593 Kilbane Everton £2.0m 0 595 McFadden Everton £2.5m 0 597 P Neville Everton £3.0m 0 599 Osman Everton £3.5m 0 601 van der Meyde Everton £2.0m 0 603 M Brown Fulham £2.0m 0 605 Bullard Fulham £4.0m 0 607 Diop Fulham £3.0m 0 609 S Elliott Fulham £2.0m 0 613 C Jensen Fulham £1.0m 0 615 Legwinski Fulham £1.5m 0 617 Malbranque Fulham £4.0m 0 619 Gerrard Liverpool £8.0m 0 621 Gonzalez Liverpool £4.5m 0 623 Kewell Liverpool £4.0m 0 624 J Pennant Liverpool £4.0m 0 625 Riise Liverpool £4.0m 0 627 Sissoko Liverpool £4.5m 0 629 Xabi Alonso Liverpool £5.0m 0 631 Zenden Liverpool £4.0m 0 632 Carrick Manchester United £5.0m 0 633 D Fletcher Manchester United £3.0m 0 635 Giggs Manchester United £4.0m 0 637 Park Manchester United £4.0m 0 639 Ronaldo Manchester United £5.0m 0 641 Scholes Manchester United £4.0m 0 643 Richardson Manchester United £2.5m 0 645 Barton Manchester City £4.0m 0 647 Dabo Manchester City £3.0m 0 649 Hamann Manchester City £3.0m 0 651 Reyna Manchester City £2.0m 0 653 Sibierski Manchester City £2.0m 0 655 Sinclair Manchester City £2.0m 0 657 Ireland Manchester City £1.5m 0 659 Boateng Middlesbrough £3.5m 0 660 Cattermole Middlesbrough £3.0m 0 661 Downing Middlesbrough £3.5m 0 663 Morrison Middlesbrough £2.5m 0 665 Rochemback Middlesbrough £2.5m 0 667 Butt Newcastle United £2.0m 0 669 Dyer Newcastle United £3.0m 0 671 Emre Newcastle United £4.0m 0 673 Faye Newcastle United £2.5m 0 675 N'Zogbia Newcastle United £3.5m 0 677 Parker Newcastle United £4.0m 0 679 Solano Newcastle United £4.0m 0 683 Sean Davis Portsmouth £2.0m 0 685 R Hughes Portsmouth £2.0m 0 687 Mendes Portsmouth £2.5m 0 689 O'Neil Portsmouth £3.5m 0 690 Thompson Portsmouth £2.5m 0 691 Benjani (N/A) Portsmouth £2.5m 0 693 Harper Reading £2.5m 0 694 S Ki-Hyeon Reading £2.5m 0 695 Little Reading £2.0m 0 697 Sidwell Reading £2.5m 0 699 Gunnarsson Reading £2.0m 0 701 A Quinn Sheff Utd £2.0m 0 703 Ifill Sheff Utd £2.5m 0 705 Jagielka Sheff Utd £2.5m 0 706 Li Tie Sheff Utd £2.5m 0 707 Montgomery Sheff Utd £2.0m 0 708 Tonge Sheff Utd £2.0m 0 711 Jenas Tottenham £3.0m 0 713 Lennon Tottenham £4.0m 0 715 Danny Murphy Tottenham £2.5m 0 717 A Reid Tottenham £2.0m 0 719 Routledge Tottenham £2.0m 0 721 Tainio Tottenham £2.0m 0 723 Davids Tottenham £3.0m 0 725 Zokora Tottenham £3.0m 0 727 Francis Watford £2.0m 0 729 Mahon Watford £2.0m 0 733 Spring Watford £2.0m 0 735 Bowyer West Ham £3.0m 0 737 Reo-Coker West Ham £4.0m 0 739 Etherington West Ham £2.5m 0 741 C Fletcher (N/A) West Ham £1.5m 0 743 Benayoun West Ham £3.5m 0 744 Landzaat Wigan £2.5m 0 745 McCulloch Wigan £2.5m 0 747 Teale Wigan £2.0m 0 749 Kavanagh Wigan £2.5m 0 Striker ↓Code↓* ↓Player↓ ↓Club↓ ↓Value↓ ↓Points↓ 801 Adebayor Arsenal £3.0m 0 803 Henry Arsenal £8.0m 0 805 Reyes Arsenal £4.0m 0 807 Van Persie Arsenal £4.0m 0 809 Walcott Arsenal £2.5m 0 813 Angel Aston Villa £2.0m 0 815 Baros Aston Villa £2.5m 0 817 L Moore Aston Villa £2.5m 0 819 Phillips Aston Villa £3.0m 0 821 Jeffers Blackburn £2.0m 0 823 Kuqi Blackburn £2.5m 0 824 B McCarthy Blackburn £3.5m 0 825 Roberts Blackburn £4.0m 0 827 Borgetti Bolton £2.0m 0 829 Kevin Davies Bolton £3.0m 0 831 Diouf Bolton £2.0m 0 833 H Pedersen Bolton £1.0m 0 835 Vaz Te Bolton £2.5m 0 837 D Bent Charlton Athletic £4.0m 0 839 M Bent Charlton Athletic £2.0m 0 841 Hasselbaink Charlton Athletic £5.0m 0 843 Crespo (N/A) Chelsea £4.5m 0 845 Drogba Chelsea £4.5m 0 847 Kalou Chelsea £3.5m 0 849 Shevchenko Chelsea £6.0m 0 851 Beattie Everton £4.0m 0 853 A Johnson Everton £4.5m 0 855 Boa Morte Fulham £3.0m 0 857 Helguson Fulham £3.0m 0 859 John Fulham £3.0m 0 861 McBride Fulham £3.5m 0 863 Radzinski Fulham £2.0m 0 865 Bellamy Liverpool £4.5m 0 867 Fowler Liverpool £3.5m 0 869 Luis Garcia Liverpool £4.0m 0 871 Crouch Liverpool £4.0m 0 873 Rooney Manchester United £8.0m 0 875 Saha Manchester United £5.0m 0 877 A Smith Manchester United £4.0m 0 879 Solskjaer Manchester United £2.0m 0 883 Andrew Cole Manchester City £4.0m 0 884 B Corradi Manchester City £3.0m 0 885 Dickov Manchester City £2.5m 0 887 Samaras Manchester City £2.5m 0 889 Vassell Manchester City £3.0m 0 891 Viduka Middlesbrough £4.0m 0 893 Yakubu Middlesbrough £4.5m 0 895 Maccarone Middlesbrough £2.5m 0 897 Ameobi Newcastle United £3.5m 0 899 Luque Newcastle United £3.0m 0 903 LuaLua Portsmouth £3.0m 0 909 Todorov Portsmouth £2.0m 0 911 Convey Reading £2.5m 0 913 Doyle Reading £2.5m 0 915 Kitson Reading £2.5m 0 917 Lita Reading £2.0m 0 918 Akinbiyi Sheff Utd £2.0m 0 919 Shipperly Sheff Utd £2.0m 0 920 Hulse Sheff Utd £2.5m 0 921 Webber Sheff Utd £2.5m 0 923 Kabba Sheff Utd £2.0m 0 925 Berbatov Tottenham £4.5m 0 927 Defoe Tottenham £3.5m 0 929 Robbie Keane Tottenham £4.5m 0 931 M King Watford £2.5m 0 933 D Henderson Watford £2.0m 0 934 A Young Watford £2.0m 0 935 Carlton Cole West Ham £2.0m 0 937 Harewood West Ham £3.5m 0 939 Zamora West Ham £2.5m 0 941 Sheringham West Ham £1.5m 0 943 Ashton West Ham £3.5m 0 945 Henri Camara Wigan £2.5m 0 946 Connolly Wigan £2.0m 0 947 Heskey Wigan £3.0m 0 949 Johansson Wigan £2.0m 0 TEAM SELECTION RULES 1. Your team's value cannot exceed £50 million. 2. Maximum of TWO players from any one side. 3. Your team must have 1 keeper, 4 defenders, 3 or 4 midfielders, and 2 or 3 strikers. Scoring Rules; RULE POINTS Awarded seven or more in Sun Sport's player ratings 3 Star Man in Sun Sport's player ratings 5 Goal Scored 5 Scoring three or more goals per game 5 Clean Sheet (keeper/defender) 5 Clean Sheet (midfielder) 2 Conceded more than one goal (keeper/defender) -1 per goal Penalty save (keeper) 3 Booking -1 Sent off -3 in total Season's top individual points scorer bonus 20 Click here for more information on scoring rules [+] © The Sun Newspaper

I used to work for one of these pretentious maggots; everything was fucking 'Bigtime' this and 'vis-a-vis' that, even used to talk about 'hinterlands' FFS! He also liked to believe he knew something about computers so I deliberately used the term 'trojan-horses' in his office to see how long it would take him to use it in a big meeting (having nay idea what it meant). 2 fucking days, tbf I think he'd contained himself. Run it up the flagpole then hang yersel' off it, necker.

do we have any young strikers pumping them in in the reserves/academy/catering branch? Is there a proto-Theo Walcott bubbling under? Anything at all?

Mountain Man: What do you want to do now? Toothless Man: [grinning] He's got a real pretty mouth on him, don't he? Mountain Man: Ain't that the truth. Toothless Man: [to Ed] You gonna do some prayin' for me, boy. And you better pray real good.

I'm writing a musical about a turd floating in my drink. It's surprisingly good so far. May have to develop a love interest though.

The smilie is thataway! 175614[/snapback] tbh 175632[/snapback] Babylon 5 is without doubt the most ambitious tv series ever. 175637[/snapback] Fort Boyard, shirley?

Even though you're not asking, I'll contribute one of my hitching stories.. I once picked up this nutter who was travelling around the country sleeping on park benches and handing out badly hand-written flyers offering his services. He looked a bit like the comedian in Mancmags avatar. As I'd given him a ride he was kind enough to give me one (oo-er), it went something like this; 'Paynting, gardning, rubish remoofals, genrel od jobs, cheap. Have own tools' There was a phone number on there which was his home number in Bristol - back in the day before mobile phones. Nutter. I made the mistake of asking what tools he was carrying, and lo and behold he pulled this beastly curved 16 inch rusty blade out of his bag and maniacally grinned, 'I have this, but that's mostly for sleeping rough.' I was happy to drop him at the next junction. Still pick them up though, I've hitched round half of Australia and know the pain of waiting for hours and hours in the baking heat with no water, no hope and no dope. Actually when I come to think of it I have picked up a collection of freaks in my time. Just lucky, I guess.

Every time I see your name mate I sing 'bonnie bobby shafto' in my head and for that alone I give thanks.

Alan O. in the press box. 175706[/snapback] Oh it's a !! case closed.

my point exactly........

Lad: Nah, just a couple of slices.

I grew my fine blonde hair long for a year or two when addled by drugs and delusions. A sorry time in my history known as the Pfieffer years. skinheed ever since.

Robert could hit a fly on an elephants arse at 50 yards; do you think it was deliberate? lazy git should have been tbf

these go up to eleven..

No need to be fashionable with your diving skills from all reports. 175659[/snapback] Are you PADI or BSAC?

To be fair, people could ask the same about your INCESSANT HORRIDNESS. 175561[/snapback] lol

Marmalade - SoaD