Monkeys Fist

Years ago, when I used to take groups to Corby Crags, on the Alnwick->Rothbury road, I’d fill them full of shite about Edlingham Castle, saying it was the worlds only castle built on a bridge. It looks like this when viewed from the east Incidentally, you can see it on the Hobbit Movie Poster , if you zoom in to the right of Gandaft.

Why would they put the Tyne Bridge on top of the stadium?

Gemmill getting his Robespierre wig on…

Woke up just as the 2nd half was starting. Should’ve had a lie-in THE SCENE- a woman hovers in the doorway of a home in London, just after her husband hears the full time whistle … HRH Mrs. Gloom- “ What was the score then dear?” HRH The King -“ It was a draw pet, 2 weeks until my next match thread… Long Live The King!” The woman melts back to the kitchen and sits down…

My favourite Blondie track Excellent as usual from Elvis Ramone.

Two absolute stone-cold classics… … and Errol

Renton, you’re in deep cover over there- how many posts have the Morlocks made about the obvious match fixing going on there with the Leeds keeper clearly being paid off by The Pocket Money Billionaire? Mag behaviour tbh.

Does the Throne not have lumbar support, Your Maj?

I pulled the intercostal muscles under my left tit the other day whilst digging out a new patio area in my garden. Random movements produce a feeling like someone has stuck a molten iron rod through my chest. I’m due to start my 4 day driving shift tonight too

My old man had a mixed history when it came to cars- he owned, at various times, a Triumph TR6, several Minis, a Saab 69, Ford Anglia, Lancia Beta, but he fucked it big time by buying not one, but two Austin Allegros.

Mrs. Gloom after nearly a week of “Royalty”…

Adam Pearson; Toonpack, if I tried to say the v-word, you’d drown and my tongue would strangle itself. Let’s say you had a jab, yeah?

Q;What does her minge smell like? A; Herbie.

Shift manager at Nissan gave it the thumbs up, so Plod was happy.

That’s a bit low- do you not think they’ve suffered enough?

5-0 A double hat trick from the Handsome Chook, with a bit of badge kissing to send the Scouse mackems home to their hovels in fighting mood. Extra-time winner from Ollie Bernard

If the Wimbledon fans don’t pick up all their litter at the end of the match there’s going to be hell on.

You’re not taking in to account that we’ll need a new Trophy Wing…

I think my old man took us to Washington when he went to the old hall? It clearly made a lasting impression

I aim for the little cunts.

He’d have to find a disabled good buddy to drive for him though.

“Mr. Fist , the tests show you have a degenerative neurological disease “ “Shit Doc, I only came in to have my prostate tickled. “ ” Don’t worry, it’s one of the good ones”

Give him a break- he’s had to attend his Coronation … … I think that’s what he meant when he said, ” Fuck me , I’m crowning! “